The Flights of Fate
by mizbiscuit
Summary: Jasper returned to Forks only a week after Bella's fateful birthday party only to find her well into the change and all alone. Eventual J/B story, Rated M for language,and possible lemons, AU.
1. Chapter 1 Finding Bella

**AN: Welcome to The Flights of Fate. This is my first venture into writing fan fiction so please let me know how you like it. Just in case you missed it in the summary, this will be a Jasper/Bella story. **

**For this chapter and all other following it, I own nothing having to do with Twilight, my best friend stole my books so I don't even own those.**

**Chapter 1 – Finding Bella**

**BPOV**

It was worse then what they said it would be. The pain, the burning, it was blinding. I wanted to die, to give up and fade away into blackness, but I knew that wasn't what would happen. Oh I would die but the fading away into blackness wouldn't come. No, I would die then wake up, never to rest again.

I was surprised just how aware I was of what happened and what was around me, even through the pain. I would have thought that all I could focus on was the burn, that is what they always told me anyway. But I knew where I was and that I was alone. _He_ moved me inside, to a bedroom and then left. I heard his whispered _I'm sorry_ but I really didn't need to. I heard him, the fight he had with himself in his mind, the moment he bit me. I didn't know if that was normal but I heard it none the less. In a sick way I was proud of him for stopping, for choosing change, for not draining me of every drop like he really wanted to. I couldn't even bring myself to hate him for killing me even if my new found knowledge ripped a hole in my heart. I heard a lot in those few moments where my life hung between meal and change. I know now he never really loved me like I loved him. Sure I opened up his heart and showed him how to love but what he felt for me wasn't near what I felt for him. I can only hope that I at least allowed him to open up enough so that when he did find his true mate he could love her with every bit of his heart and not just the fraction he allowed me to have.

I feel a hot drip fall from my eyes and down my cheek. First loves never last my mother told me. They are rarely true. I am sad to say that I now believe her.

~*~

It has been two days now since Edward bit me and left me to change. I can not move and it still hurts, a lot, but at least I am able to think around the burning. I have run through all my memories that I want to try and keep twice now. Its with noting else to occupy myself with that I start in on round three. I make it to the age of 12 when I hear the front door open then shut. Did he actually come back? And why is thinking that he did scare me to death?

Whoever it is stopped just inside the door and is just standing there. My senses are stronger but not to full strength yet so I have to strain my ears to catch any hint of who is here and where they are going. They haven't moved yet and I start to worry. It's not Edward. Edward knows where I am, hell, he is the one who put me in this bed. If it's not Edward though who is it? If a human finds me they wont have a clue as to what is going on with me and a hospital would be the worst place for me to wake up. Its with that frightening thought that I hear them slowly walk to the stairs and start to climb.

The closer to the landing they get the more upset I become. I can not have the wrong person find me. That would destroy everything, the secret can not get out.

The steps stop outside my door. I can hear a hand on the door knob slowly turning and the creek of the door as it opens. Whoever it is on the other side is being very cautious.

"Oh, fuck. Bella..." It was barley a whisper but I heard it. Then I felt the air shift around me as he ran to my side, placing a hand on my forehead. The cool of his skin was a welcome relief to the burning inferno that was my body. "Oh, Bella. What happened to you? Have you been alone this whole time? Who would leave you to go through this alone? No one should go through this at all much less have to do it alone." He sounded so sad. So broken as he moved his hand to cup my cheek. I didn't know what happened to make him sound this way but I didn't like it. I felt him move, sitting and pulling his legs up onto the bed to sit indian style on my left as he removed his hand from my face. I couldn't help the whimper that escaped my lips at the loss of the cool feeling. "It's ok Bella. I am right here next to you. This is Jasper, honey. I'll be right here until you wake up. I promise. I wont leave you to be alone again."

Jasper. It felt good not to be alone. I hadn't let myself be scared or hope that Edward would come back. Deep down I knew that he wouldn't and because of what he said during our fight I didn't dare hope that one of the others would either. I wouldn't have been able to cope with the change, the pain of Edward leaving me, _and_ the disappointment of the Cullen's not coming to help me. But one did come back. I don't know why he, out of all of them, was here but I wasn't one to complain. I could hear him next to me pull out his phone and press a key. Please don't be calling him, please.

"Carlisle," oh thank God, he didn't call Edward. "I'm at the house in Forks...No, Edward isn't here but...Look Carlisle I don't want to talk about that right now..." He sounds angry but that broken tone is still there. I wonder what has happened in the short time since my birthday to break him so. "Either way Carlisle, you should know that I am sitting next to Bella...Ugh! Would you please let me finish a God damn sentence?...Thank you. Is everyone else there?" I heard him take a deep breath as he tried to continue. "Ok, please try not to interrupt, I will tell you what I know and will try to answer questions when I am done. I am sitting in Alice's old room in Forks with Bella who is about two days through the change. I just got here about 10 minutes ago, the freshest sent other then hers is Edwards and it is also about two days old. As far as I can tell she has been alone for that time. She has made no sounds thus far aside from a whimper or two but her emotions relaxed significantly once I spoke to her. I believe she not only knows that I am here but who I am."

Well he was right about that, I do know that he is here and that he is Jasper. It is also good to know that I am going though everything on schedule. I will admit that I was worried that with the way Edward bit me I wouldn't get a lot of venom and it would take longer. Wait. He can feel my emotions. So he feels my pain too? Oh no! I don't want him to feel that! No, no no! He shouldn't have to deal with my pain, that is not fair! I heard the phone drop to the floor.

"Bella? BELLA? Whats wrong? Calm down honey, I am right here. What is going on sweetheart? It will all be ok, you are almost done. It will all be over soon sweetheart" He was scared. I tried to take a deep breath and calm down. I guess my panic threw him off. I heard him pick up the phone again.

"Carlsile? Sorry about that...Yeah she is fine but I can't feel her anymore..." What?!? He can't feel me at all now? What happened? "No, nothing...I felt a huge spike of panic and guilt then it all went away, if it wasn't for seeing her breathing and hearing her heartbeat I would swear she was dead...Yes, that might be a good idea. How long?...Ok, see you then...I will...Goodbye." With that I heard him let out a breath and close the phone. I got the feeling that this telephone call was harder on him then it should have been, and not just because he found me changing. I feel so bad for him, I am sure that this isn't what he came back for. Although I wonder why Alice didn't call him to warn him, or for that matter, why she didn't come earlier. Shouldn't she have seen this?

I felt Jasper put his hand back on my forehead and stroke my hair. It was so soothing for such a simple gesture. I felt more relaxed then ever before even with the constant burning of my flesh. Then he began whispering encouragements to me. Just small phrases of hope. I could hear in his voice he was scared and worried about me, for me. I wanted nothing more in that moment to be able to open my eyes and let him know I was ok but somehow I knew that by opening my eyes it would break down the wall around the pain and I would no longer be able to control it or think around it. So I did the only thing I could at that moment. I reached out with my hand to find his and took a hold of it. I heard his quick intake of breath and his other hand that was on my head paused its movement. I gave his hand one small squeeze and then relaxed. I heard him exhale his held breath and move our joined hands to his lap but he did not let go and neither did I.

23 hours, 42 minutes, and 7 seconds later I felt my heart beat its last beat as I finally opened my eyes.

**JPOV**

I turned and looked once more at the window where my wife, excuse me, ex-wife stood. I really wanted to hate her for leaving me. Especially right now, when I need her support the most. Sometimes I think she took my attack on Bella harder then even Edward did. But try as I might to hate her I couldn't. She saved me from the darkness and became my light, my reason to live, to try and be a better man. Even if she no longer returns those feelings I couldn't hate her. She had given me to much.

She was standing at her window just looking out at me. I could see the pain in her eyes. I knew she was lying when she said she didn't love me anymore but I could also feel her resolve and determination. For whatever reason she felt like she needed to do this, to break us apart, so I let her. With a sigh and a small smile for my first real love I turn around and take off into the forest.

I had no idea where I was running to I just knew that I couldn't stay with the family right now. It hurt Esme that I was leaving but she understood. I promised to keep in touch and come back to them and I fully plan on it. I just need a bit of time to find myself again. For decades I was part of something, half of Alice & Jasper. Now I am just Jasper and I don't really know how to be _just_ Jasper.

After draining a few of the random animals I crossed paths with I came across a small clearing ringed with tall pines and a low flat rock in the center. It was so peaceful here. I settled down on the edge of the rock to think out where I was going to go, what I was going to do. Pulling my knees up I wrap my arms around my legs, lay my head on my arms and close my eyes. I sat there like that, not moving, for two days just thinking. It was twilight at the end of that second day when it happened.

I heard a rustle right in front of me. I scented the air but could catch nothing but a deer. Normally animals shy away from us, knowing we are the predator, so I open my eyes to see what had made the sound. It was a small fawn, his spots just starting to fade. He tentatively took a step from the cover of the trees into the clearing. Glancing around he lowered his head to graze on the lush grass that the break in the forest ceiling allowed to grow. Not moving I watch the fawn make his way around the clearing, nibbling the grass and weeds as he goes, until he was standing so close all I would have to do would be to reach out and I could have touched him. Never since I had been turned have I been this close to an animal except to feed from it, as none would ever have allowed it. I watched him with awe for what felt like hours.

I don't know why this little guy wasn't afraid of me. Maybe he was just as alone and lost as I was. As true darkness started to take over he finally lifted his head and looked directly at me. Animal emotions were very different then human or vampire but they still have them. They were just a lot simpler and more basic, just a step above instinct. I marveled that this little one was able to hold my stare and show not an ounce of fear. All I felt from him was safety and contentment. His big rich brown eyes were so expressive and deep I found myself getting lost as I continued to stare into them. I don't know how long we stood like that but when he finally broke the stare I felt oddly at ease, like he took all the tension away from me. He walked to where I was sitting on the rock and laid down at my feet. I reached out and slowly began to pet his head, scratching just behind his ears. The emotional roller coaster that I had been on for the last two days forgotten as I closed my eyes and reveled in the company of this tiny baby deer who was radiating nothing but happiness and trust.

The next morning dawned early when the young deer left. With slow movements he stood and turned to look back at me, his expressive human like eyes once again meeting my own for the briefest of moments before turning his back on me and leaping into the forest. As I watched him go I looked into myself and found that I was very content. The emotions of despondency and loss I had been circling around the previous days were gone, to be replaced with happiness and hope. It was then that I knew Carlisle was right. There was something or someone out there, watching over us all, vampire or not. It was also at that moment that I knew I needed to let go of my past in order to be true to myself and I knew just where to start that.

Standing I took stock of where I was. Best I could figure I was in the middle of Canada. I needed to run southwest to get back to Washington, where I would find Edward and Bella and apologize to them both before going on my way. It should only take about a day and a half for me to get to the old house, if I hurry. Now I just needed a plan,. Bella, I can imagine, would be terrified of me. I guess I shouldn't surprise her then. I wonder if I talk to Edward first that he might talk to Bella to see if she would let me apologize. Not that good a plan but I guess its a start. I was broken out of my thoughts when my cell rang. Looking at the display I was surprised to see Alice flashing. She promised not to call, to let me be for a while until I felt I could just be friends with her, just family. With a deep breath I open the phone.

"Yes Alice?"

"Jasper, I'm sorry to call, I really am but I am so scared! Bella disappeared Jasper!"

"What do you mean she disappeared? She ran away?"

"No, I mean her future just went black. I saw her and Edward taking a walk in the forest by the old house and then it all just went black. Not even the fog I get when there are multiple decisions that haven't been made. Just darkness." She was getting frantic, although I could understand why. I was a bit upset and scared myself.

"Its ok Alice, calm down for me please babe. Take a deep breath." I could hear her intake and attempts of calming herself down. "I was just getting ready to head back there when you called. I will find out whats going on and let you know, ok? Just sit tight. I am a little over a day away." She is quiet as I finish my thoughts. She probably slipped into a vision to see how things turn out. When she finally speaks it is just barely a whisper.

"I see you get to the house fine but I can't see what happens. I don't know whats going on. I....Jasper...Just be careful ok?"

"Sure thing Alice. You know me, always over thinking things, it will be fine. I will be fine and so will Bella. I will call when I get there." With that I hung up and took off towards Forks.

~*~

I was just about to the house when I first heard it, a faint but erratic heartbeat. I paused just at the bottom of the front stairs and looked around. The house looked the same as when we left just a week prior. I couldn't even catch any fresh scents. Edward's was around but it was a few days old and Bella's was very faint but fresher and...off. It was the same freesia but there was something else with it, something almost fresh, like the first few moments after a heavy rain. With one last look around I was satisfied that no one else was around so I went to start climbing the stairs when my phone buzzed in my pocket, I had a new message from Alice.

**Your entire future just went dark. Be careful, call when you can.**

**-A**

So whatever caused Bella's future to go black is inside the house. I carefully make my way to the front door and walk inside, shutting it behind me. I just stand there and listen. The heartbeat, that I can now tell is from Alice's old bedroom upstairs, doesn't change, for better or worse, and there are no other sounds in the house. Scenting the air I find nothing different from outside. Slowly I make my way to the second story of the house and to Alice's door. Its strange but I never really considered this my room even though it was. I had a study on the third floor that was much more me and this room was really for Ali.

Taking a deep breath I reach for the knob and slowly creep open the door. Nothing could have prepared me for what was inside.

Bella was laying on the bed. About two days through the change. "Oh, fuck. Bella..." I couldn't help but whisper out to her as I ran to her side, lightly placing my hand to her forehead. This would explain why her sent smelled off. The change will have started to affect it."Oh, Bella. What happened to you? Have you been alone this whole time? Who would leave you to go through this alone? No one should go through this at all much less have to do it alone." I just couldn't help but ramble aloud. I felt so bad for her, having been alone all this time. I mean, where the hell was Edward? He was staying here to be with her until the family came back. Why the fuck would he just abandon her, especially when she is going through the change? I know he knew she was going though it, his sent leads right here then out again. He brought her here and then left. Damn-it! Is the entire family falling apart? With a deep breath I try to get a handle on all my emotions and speak to Bella in a soothing voice. She doesn't need to hear my pain or anger right now. "It's ok Bella. I am right here next to you. This is Jasper, honey. I'll be right here until you wake up. I promise. I wont leave you to be alone again." I have to call Carlisle. Maybe he has spoken to Edward. Moving slightly I sit up on the bed next to Bella and cross my legs while digging out my phone. I don't know if she can hear me or not but I won't leave her, not even to make this call, as hard as it might be to talk to them all again so soon after my departure.

With a deep breath to seal the hurricane of different emotions swirling around inside me I press the speed dial key for my father.

"Jasper, my son. How are you?"

"Carlisle, I'm at the house in Forks" I am met with silence with that statement. I could almost hear the worry come through the phone with his next sentence though.

"Is Edward there with you?" I can't help but roll my eyes. Cause if I wanted to do anything Edward would have been able to stop me.

"No, Edward isn't here but..."

"Jasper, son, do you think that it is wise for you to be there right now? After what happened with Bella at her party..." Ugh! I so do not have time for this shit right now.

"Look Carlisle I don't want to talk about that right now..."

"Well you might not want to talk about it but Edward asked that we not come back for a while and I think that it is important that we respect his wishes on the matter." Oh he is so trying my patience right now.

"Either way Carlisle, you should know that I am sitting next to Bella..."

"What happened Jasper?!? Where is Edward?" Why wont he just let me finish a fucking thought! Oh, and thanks for the confidence there Pops, really.

"Ugh! Would you please let me finish a God damn sentence?" I heard a mumbled _yes, sorry_ so I just kept talking. I was done with this game. The family needed to know what was going on. "Thank you. Is everyone else there?" I hear a chorus of yeses. Good. I didn't want to have to repeat myself.

"Ok, please try not to interrupt, I will tell you what I know and will try to answer questions when I am done. I am sitting in Alice's old room in Forks with Bella who is about two days through the change. I just got here about 10 minutes ago, the freshest sent other then hers is Edwards and it is also about two days old. As far as I can tell she has been alone for that time. She has made no sounds thus far aside from a whimper or two but her emotions relaxed significantly once I spoke to her. I believe she not only knows that I am here but who I am." Pausing to take a breath I felt Bella's emotions spike to panic and guilt. The force of their strength just about caused me to run screaming. I did drop the phone as I turned to Bella.

"Bella? BELLA? Whats wrong? Calm down honey, I am right here. What is going on sweetheart? It will all be ok, you are almost done. It will all be over soon, sweetheart" I couldn't help but be scared for her. She hasn't made a sound and...wait a second. I push my gift out to get a gauge on her emotions but there weren't any. I have never _not_ felt someone. Phone...what happened to the phone. Looking around I see it next to me and hear the family on the other end going crazy asking questions over each other.

"Carlsile? Sorry about that."

"Jasper, is she alright? What happened?"

"Yeah she is fine but I can't feel her anymore..." Why can't I feel her? I hope nothing is going wrong. Please God, if you are there and listening, don't let anything be going wrong with her change!

"What do you mean you can't feel her? Can you feel anything, if nothing else you should be able to feel her pain." He sounded worried. I can't say as I blame him. I hear Alice in the background saying something about having just lost everyone's future now.

"No, nothing." Taking a deep breath to try and calm the panic I could still feel I try to calm myself down. I can't help Bella if I can't get in control. "I felt a huge spike of panic and guilt then it all went away, if it wasn't for seeing her breathing and hearing her heartbeat I would swear she was dead."

"We are on our way there Jasper." As much as I am not ready to see them yet I am so happy they are coming and I didn't have to ask.

"Yes, that might be a good idea. How long?"

"We should be there in about 15 hours. We should be there before she wakes up, we will hurry."

"Ok, see you then."

"Oh, and Jasper? Take care of yourself and call us if you need anything. Anything, son. Keep us updated."

"I will. Goodbye." Closing the phone I set it next to me. Reaching out I slowly run my fingers through Bella's hair hoping to bring at least a small amount of comfort to her. I softly whisper positive thoughts of friendship and family, letting her know that I was here and that the family loved her while thinking about the situation. It was so strange, I felt her pain when I first got here so I knew she was going through the change normally but she was so quiet. Normally someone going through the change would be screaming their fool head off. I know I did when I had to go through it. And then to suddenly have all her emotions cut off? I didn't like it. I could understand why Edward was so fascinated by not being able to hear her mind now. It was just....wrong not to feel emotions from her when she was clearly feeling them.

Suddenly her left hand grabs a hold of my own and I freeze. She then gives me a gentle, reassuring, squeeze. She shouldn't be able to move let alone control her motions! Moving our hands to my lap I start stroking through her hair again. I feel her relax just a fraction so I keep talking to her. She never made another move but for whatever reason I could tell she understood every word I spoke, so I talked to her about just about everything. We covered what few memories from my human years I could remember, I told her about Maria and the years after my change (although I might have left out some of the really horrible things I did) and of meeting Alice and the Cullens. I told her of my travels around the world and the little things that have changed since my human years. I told her about Peter and Charlotte. I told her about my struggles with the animal only diet and how sorry I was for her birthday party. I told her about Alice and our breakup. Anything and everything that I could think of I talked to her about, including many things that I had not even spoke to Alice about. It had been 16 hours that I had been talking to Bella almost constantly when I heard cars pull up the drive.

"Bella, sweetheart, the rest of the family is here. Well, everyone but Edward, we don't know where he is." I felt her hand tighten on mine. "Don't worry, I won't leave you. I'll stay right here next to you until you wake up, just like I promised." I heard the front door open and in a half a second the bedroom door was next. Alice was first followed by Esme and Emmett. Rose and Carlisle not far behind. Looking into their shocked faces I knew that they really hadn't believed me when I told them what I had come home to. Shock was the main reaction but that was quickly followed by anger. Sending some calm out to the room I just let them have their moment to come to grips with the situation. I saw Carlisle pull his phone out and quickly type a message before he looked to me and slowly walked towards us.

"Son, she is so quiet. Can you get any read on her at all?"

He sat on her other side and reached up to brush her cheek when she flinched away. "Nothing emotionally although she did tighten her grip on my hand when I told her you all were here." His eyes snapped to mine as he lowered his hand. "Bella, honey, it's just Carlisle. There isn't anything to be afraid of. I am here with you, I won't let anything happen to you." She relaxed and I nodded to Carlisle. She let him touch her this time.

"How...?"

"I don't know Carlisle. She doesn't move often and it seems to be a great effort when she does. She doesn't really respond to anything I have said but I have a feeling she has understood everything. She has not made a sound outside of a few whimpers since I arrived. I felt her pain and fear when I first got here so I know everything was progressing normally. Then I was able to feel her trust and happiness when I first spoke to her but since our telephone call I have not felt a single thing from her." And I didn't like it. I have watched over countless newborns and none have ever acted like this. Or even close to this. I just hope that everything is fine and she isn't stuck in some limbo.

The family filtered out of the room at this point and just kind of milled around the house waiting. Esme tried to relieve me of Bella's side once but she would not let go of my hand so I just smiled at my mother and let her know I was fine. And surprisingly I was. My verbal purge, to an all but unconscious, Bella helped me more then I would have thought possible. I still want to make my way back to Texas but the need to go now wasn't as strong. As I was reflecting on this Alice popped her head in. Waving her over she sat across from me on Bella's other side and started to stroke her hair. After a few quiet moments she looked up to me with unshedable tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry Jasper. I know you don't want to be around me right now..."

"Alice, stop. I am fine." Again, I surprisingly was. It still hurt, a lot, but I somehow felt like it would all be ok in time. I was where I was needed at this moment. "Don't get me wrong, it still hurts that we aren't together but I think I can agree with you now. We ran our coarse and it was time to call it. Please, lets just try and be friends, Bella is going to need us both I think."

"Your right, she is. Just know that I never wanted to hurt you and a part of me will always love you."

"I know." We sat there in silence for another few hours until I finally heard Bella's heartbeat speed up. Her last moments alive were upon us. In moments her heart would cease to beat and she would open her eyes to a whole new existence. Quietly the rest of the family came into the bedroom as Alice got up to go stand with them.

As we heard the final beat of Bella's heart she opened her eyes and turned to look directly into mine.


	2. Chapter 2 A New Vampire

**AN: Thank you all so much for the reviews and alerts!! I am blown away at how much response just the first chapter has received. You all made my weekend. This chapter is still some of the set up/background type stuff but will hopefully answer a few questions re: Alice and Jasper. I promise there will be Bella/Jasper interaction in Chap #3.**

**Let me know how you like it and as always I own nada.**

**Chapter 2 – A New Vampire**

**BPOV**

My first thought as I open my eyes was that there are far more colors in this world then we are ever taught about in kindergarten. They were everywhere and were so bright and sharp. I started to feel a bit overwhelmed and my instincts were telling me to run and hide, even though, intellectually, I knew I was safe. I could now understand why I was always told a new born vampire was unpredictable. Especially if they didn't really know what was happening to them. Even without taking a breath the smells around were overpowering, I could hear things miles away, my instincts were running all over the place and the new sharp vision was just beyond words.

I knew Jasper was still on the bed with me. My hand was still in his, although his had tensed up the moment I opened my eyes. Looking over at him my eyes are met with his amber ones. Only the amber is broken with a large swirl of bright blue. I never noticed that he had any color in his eyes, Edward's never did but then I guess I didn't exactly spend a lot of time staring into Jasper's eyes. Looking into them now though I feel only security and trust and I realized the need to run and hide had lessened. Taking in the rest of him with my new sight I can see the many scars that my human eyes missed. I was glad he had told me his story while I changed, he is very intimidating and I can only imagine my reaction if I hadn't known what to expect.

Feeling better about the situation I go to sit up. Before the thought is even finished I had already moved. Hmm, that vampire speed will be something that will take some time to get used to. The moment I had moved Jasper dropped my hand and stood up. He was backing away from me with his hands up in the air, I guess to show he didn't mean me harm, but I already knew that. I could see it in his eyes he wouldn't hurt me, that I could trust him.

"What's wrong Jasper?" My hand flew to my mouth at the sound of my voice. It was the same but different. It was the same tone I guess but now it had a musical inflection to it.

"I didn't want to scare you Bella. I can't feel your emotions so I don't know really what to expect, which I admit is a bit new for me. Do you remember what happened? Do you know where you are?" He was speaking slowly, like I was a small child. I was irritated by it. I wasn't a kid and I wasn't some fragile human in need of constant protection anymore. I also had this pesky pain in my throat that was not going away, which wasn't helping my attitude any. I thought the burning was supposed to stop with my heart.

"I am in your house in Forks and just finished going through the change." I tried to not sound like I was irritated; I knew he only wanted to help and was feeling a bit lost without his empathy working on me. By the look on his face though my irritation leaked out. Feeling a little guilty for snapping at Jasper I take this opportunity to look around having realized that I really didn't know where I was except for the Cullen's house. It was Alice & Jasper's bedroom. I see the rest of the family in the corner on the other side of the room. I catch Carlisle's eyes and see that his gold orbs have a streak of white in them. He really does have a pure heart. I wonder if they all have a bit of color to their eyes and if they do what it means. I look next to Esme, who looks like she would be crying a river of tears if she could, and she had a bright green halo around the black of her pupil. Alice was bouncing in front of her as excited as ever and she had a blue halo in her eyes. Rose was next and her eyes held a dark green streak through them. Emmett's eyes however had no additional color, just the golden that I first expected. I couldn't help the frown that crept onto my face. It bothered me that everyone else had some color except him, even with something inside telling me that it was ok, it just meant that he never hid who he was inside.

Still frowning I shift my eyes away from everyone and look at my hands in my lap. I didn't understand why everyone had different colors in their eyes. I knew that it wasn't a coincidence and I know they were not like that when I was human. Or, at least, I couldn't see it then. It didn't make any sense to me. The more I thought about it the more uncomfortable I became. The feeling to run from them all started to come back. Something was wrong, their eyes weren't normal, even for non-human eating vampires. Looking up I find Jasper's eyes again, maybe I was just seeing things. No such luck, the blue is still there, as bright as ever. As I continue to look into them the security I felt earlier started to come back. The urge to run started to fade.

"Are you doing that? Making me feel safe?" I need to know if it was his power. My body and mind were torn. My mind knew I could trust him and trust the strange feelings I got from looking into his eyes but my body still ached to run from him, was telling me that he was dangerous. If he wasn't using his power then I knew that the urge to run was nothing more then my new born jitters.

"No Bella. That's not me." He looked confused. And he was still tense. His shoulders were stiff and with the way he was looking at me it was like he was waiting for me to do something. What, I wasn't sure, but he was definitely waiting for me to do something.

"How are you feeling Bella?" Carlisle had stepped forward as he spoke to me. My reaction was instant and nothing but instinct as I found myself peering around from behind Jasper, who seemed rather startled himself. Carlisle stopped moving, throwing his hands up and looked to Jasper who was turning to look at me.

"Bella? It's alright sweetheart, it is just Carlisle. He wouldn't hurt you. He just want's to make sure you are alright." Shifting my gaze to Jasper then back to Carlisle where I could see his concern for me. I gave up and just looked at the ground. I felt bad for being scared of him. Of all the people in this world Carlisle wouldn't hurt a fly if he could help it.

"I'm sorry Carlisle. I was just...I didn't mean..." I was speaking so quietly I knew that even with the enhanced vampire hearing he could barely hear me.

"No Bella. I'm the one who should be sorry. I should have known better. You were just acting on instinct, which is perfectly understandable. I won't come any closer until you're ready." Looking back up to him and then past him to the rest of the family I realize that is why they were all in the corner and being so quiet. Aside from Alice's bouncing they weren't even moving. I guess they didn't want to startle me into running away. But I wouldn't run away. I knew that behind Jasper I was safe. I don't know how I knew that but I did, what ever happens Jasper would take care of me.

Looking back to Jasper I put my hand to my throat. "It hurts Jasper. Why does it still hurt?"

Jasper had fully turned around to face me. He slowly put his hand on my shoulder, leaned down to be eye level and cocked an eyebrow at me. "Is it like a burn, just in your throat?" I nodded. "That is thirst Bella. You need to hunt. Would you let Emmett and I take you?"

Looking from Jasper to Emmett and back I nodded. Emmett broke out into a boyish smile and started to bounce in an Alice like fashion. I couldn't hold in the giggle that grew in my chest at the sight of huge Emmett bouncing. He was like a big kid, he really was. Jasper just smiled and shook his head. "Come on, lets go hunting." He turned me to the window as he looked back to Emmett. "You coming Em, or are you just going to stand there all day?"

That one statement finally broke the tension that had been slowly filling the room as everyone broke into an easy, light, laugh. Emmett stopped bouncing and looked deep in thought for just a second before a huge grin crept onto his face and he took off and running though the still closed windows. Everyone but Esme broke out into full laughter at that. Esme's jaw just dropped in shock. Jasper looked at me with a grin before following Emmett out the shattered window. Shaking my head at them both I quickly follow, jumping gracefully from the second story as Esme recovers from shock and begins to yell threats of manual labor at human speed to Emmett. With the thought that I was glad not to be Emmett at the moment I began running towards the forest and my first hunting trip.

Emmett and Jasper had run with me far out into the woods. They made me hold my breath for most of it, just in case a hiker happened to be close. While I knew they were just being careful and I appreciated it, I was still annoyed. I wanted to smell the forest, the trees and the dirt. The forest was one of my favorite smells. Something about it was just cleansing to me. Once they finally allowed me to take a breath it didn't disappoint though and I was in heaven. I was even able to pick up the subtlety in the sent of the different kinds of trees thanks to my enhanced senses. The only thing that could have made it better was if it had just stopped raining.

"Bella? Why don't you try and see what kinds of animals are around. Open your senses, listen and smell what is around us." I closed my eyes and did what he asked. I could smell animals, I just didn't know what they were or if they were good to eat. I could hear thousands of heartbeats, some loud, some so quiet that I wouldn't have realized they were even there had Jasper not told me to look for them. "What do you sense Bella?"

"It's all so much. It's hard to pin it down, maybe if you took me to the animals that are good to eat I can hear how they sound and how they smell so I can pick them out of the mess I smell now easier?" I wasn't sure if I was just supposed to know or if this whole hunting thing was a learned skill.

"That's a great idea Bella, I have forgotten just how much there is out here and for a new born it would be hard to pick it out." Jasper said as he closed his eyes and scented the air. He frowned and looked a little...sad? "Come on, there is a herd of deer this way. That is really the only thing around." That's strange, he sounded a bit sad and the broken tone that I heard when he first found me had crept back. It was subtle, but I caught it. Yet again I was left wondering what had happened to him over the past week but before I could say anything he and Emmett took off towards dinner. With a sigh I take off to follow them, not like I wouldn't be able to easily catch up with my new born speed, but I still didn't want to be left behind.

Once we got near the herd we slowed to a stop and I took note of how they smelled and sounded. I opened my senses again and was able to easily pick them out of the mess, although that might have just been because we were so close. Only time will tell though how well my plan worked.

"Alright Bells, have at them!" Emmett could hardly contain his excitement. I, however, was scared. I don't know why but figured it was because I really had no clue what I was supposed to do.

"Can you guys show me how you do it first?" Jasper stiffened and looked at me with a nervousness in his eyes that I did not think showed up there often. Jasper did not seem to be the kind of man to ever really get nervous.

"It is instinct Bella. You just need to let the vampire out and let it take over. We will be right here but really, there is no wrong way. We each hunt and drink a little differently." I was still scared. Biting my bottom lip I tried to give the biggest, most pathetic, eyes I could imagine. I just wanted to see them do it first. Jasper gave an exasperated sigh. "Oh, alright. Who can say no to that look? Em, why don't you do the honors and show our Bella here how it's done?"

"Blech, dude, you know I don't like deer that much. Why don't you show her, you never minded the taste."

Looking back and forth between Emmett and Jasper I could see that Jasper was having some inner fight with himself. He was just staring at the deer with this odd look in his eyes. I wonder why he didn't want to hunt in front of me. It's not like he could lose control and kill me anymore or maybe it was the deer he didn't want to hunt. Just as I was about to ask him though he looked up at Emmett and spoke even more quietly then our already whispered conversation, "I won't kill the deer Em. I can't. Please, just show her?" Jasper was almost pleading with Emmett, who looked just as confused as I was.

"Alright, no biggie. It's probably good that she watches me anyway. You know, learn from the best and all. Watch the master and learn little sis!" With a wink to me he closed his eyes.

I saw Jasper chuckle and shake his head as he stepped up behind me, put his hands on my shoulders, and lean my back into his chest. I couldn't help taking in his sent, which surprised me when it reminded me exactly of the forest after a rain. I was immediately calmer but before I had time to think about it he leaned down to talk directly into my ear. With a whisper he said, "Watch how he chooses what deer to take down first by sight then by sent..." He continued to whisper everything that Emmett did and walked me through the entire hunt. He warned me about the instinct to protect the meal and warned me not to ever sneak up on a vampire mid snack. He also said that they would do their best to give me a wide circle as well since my instincts would be on high but still stay close enough to intervene if a human wandered past. He stressed that because if I did go after a human and they didn't get to me in time there would be nothing they could do to stop me once I bit. Then he let me go to hunt for myself.

After a few deep breaths to get over the worry Jasper put there about killing people, he could have skipped that part and I wouldn't have minded, I was able to kill and eat three of the deer and only got a small amount of blood on me. Less actually then Emmett had with his one. Jasper had a good laugh about that as Emmett chased him around the forest. I couldn't help but roll my eyes at them. Silly boys....

Back at the house Esme showed me to a spare guest room up on the third floor. Alice and Rose had run to my house to get some of my things and leave a note for Charlie that I would be staying over for a few days, until we got a cover story figured out. After my shower I just kind of sat on the bed and sunk into my own thoughts. Carlisle came by a few times to check on me and try and question me about what happened but I didn't think I could tell him right now. So far no one could really get close to me except Jasper and on occasion Emmett. I knew it had to do with the fight with Edward, not my new born jitters, as I have taken to calling it, but I couldn't really tell them that without going into what happened.

Rose came by and told me her story. My heart broke for her, it's no wonder she didn't like me that much when I first met them. She also told me not to let Carlisle badger me into talking, that it had to be on my own terms, but she also said that I would never get over it if I didn't talk. I promised her I would talk eventually to someone but first I needed to come to grips with everything that happened.

Alice had stopped by a few times trying to get me to go shopping online with her. I felt bad for turning her away but I just really wanted to be alone for a while. Being around anyone just added to the stress I was feeling about the entire situation. She didn't really get the hint though and decided to sit in the chair in the corner and ramble on about who knows what. The only thing I got out of the conversation was that she was no longer able to see my future or Jasper's. She would get bits and pieces of everyone else's though. I could tell it bothered her a lot more then what she let on. She had come to live by her visions and to be without them, especially when one of the people that couldn't be seen was her husband, would be quite unsettling I imagine.

It was with thoughts of why the special powers of three of the Cullen's now did not work on me that I decided I needed some fresh air. It was dark out and clear so I knew the stars would be shining bright. Getting out of the house without running into anyone though would be difficult. Everyone but Jasper it seemed was keeping an eye out for when I ventured out of this room. Jasper was the only one I really haven't spoken to, he has yet to come check on me. I am not quite sure what to think about that. On one hand I am grateful for someone in this house trying to give me space but at the same time it would be nice to know he cares enough to check in.

With a quiet sigh I looked out the window with thoughts of sneaking out and running to the woods when I saw the small lip of the roof above. I knew that it would be easy to climb up with my new found grace so I quietly opened my window and scale the outside wall up to the roof.

As I stand up I was surprised to find I wasn't the only one who came up here for air.

**JPOV**

Our eyes met and I couldn't look away. It was like her bright red eyes were looking straight through to my very soul. I can admit it was a bit unnerving but I still couldn't break the stare. It wasn't until she suddenly sat up that I realized being so close might scare her so I quickly got up and backed away. I know I told her about my scars while she changed but I don't know how much of that she really heard. If she doesn't remember I would be nothing but frightening.

I had to hold in my laugh at her reaction to hearing her voice, which was hard, but I managed to reassure her and ask if she remembered anything. I really wanted to know what happened to her, why she was not only going through the change but was doing so alone. Where was Edward? He had told us that he was going to stay here to be with her and keep her safe. At the moment I would be willing to bet my entire library that this was not a planned or even a consensual change. Her response to my questions was curt; she was irritated. Well that is at least a normal thing for a new born to feel, even if she is in amazing control of it.

Not being able to read her emotions was really messing with me. I used to handle new borns all day everyday but little Miss Bella was throwing me so far off that I ended up just standing there not really knowing what to do. When she asked me if I was making her feel safe I almost lied since that is what I _should_ have been doing. I might not be able to feel her but that didn't mean she couldn't be influenced by my power, it would have been worth a try anyway. In the end though I just could not bring myself to lie to her, even if it meant admitting that I was just standing here like a fucking lump on a log.

When Bella suddenly appeared behind me after Carlisle tried to talk to her I was surprised and just a small amount of confused. I hadn't even seen her move she was so fast! She was clearly startled by Carlisle's movement and her instincts took over but why on earth would her instincts take her to me? Looking back at her I can see the worry in her eyes as I tried to reassure her that Carlisle, who was also having trouble with how to act around New Vampire Bella, did not mean her any harm. As she tried to apologize I could see the quilt creeping into her face. Even without my power she was so easy to read.

Carlisle was sending out just as much guilt as I could see on Bella's face. Sneaking a glance at the rest of the family I could feel the general nervousness and uncertainty along with curiosity. Rose was also sending out a good amount of jealousy. I was brought back to Bella though when she asked about her thirst. Of course she would be thirsty. I should have remembered and been ready to take her hunting as soon as she woke up. One lump on a log, right here. Thinking about it quick Emmett and I would probably be the best to take her. She was clearly comfortable with me, Emmett was always able to make her feel laid back and relaxed, and the two of us should be able to keep her in check if we come across a human.

She agrees with an amazing sounding giggle that did nothing but make me want to hear her laugh and gives me a small smile. It was that smile finally breaks me of the haze of confusion I had been in since she woke up and I was able to break the tension with a joke. About time too, it was getting thick in here and I think I was starting to grow moss along with just being a lump. Then when Emmett ran through the fucking window I thought I might fall out of the damn thing I was laughing so hard. Not hard enough though to miss Bella's laugh, which was just as wonderful sounding as I thought it would be. Finally jumping out the now shattered window with Bella following close behind we start out to her first hunting trip, leaving a laughing family and a rather upset Esme behind. With a quiet chuckle I think to myself that I am so glad I am not Emmett.

Running through the forest I was able to finally take a long look at Bella. The change suits her. Not that she wasn't beautiful before but now she was down right breathtaking. No wonder Rose was sending out jealousy. Her hair had grown a few inches more and her natural red highlights were enhanced giving the color a dark cherry look. Her skin, already pale, was now almost a pearl white. She had grown another few inches and with her muscles more defined she looked like she just walked out of a magazine. Stopping before I was caught ogling her I suggest she find something nearby to eat. We should be out far enough not to worry about humans.

I was yet again caught unprepared when Bella tells me though that she can't sort through everything her senses were picking up. Where the hell has my brain gone? I should have known she would need help. I really am a fucking idiot today. Scenting the air I am sad to find that the only real edible critter around is deer.

After finding them I couldn't help but think of the little fawn from Canada that spent the night at my feet. I know he isn't one of these guys but still, I saw him when I looked into each of their eyes. When she asked we show her what to do I tried to convince myself I could do it. I used to eat deer all the time. They were plentiful and I needed to hunt quite a bit but deep down I knew I just couldn't kill one.

Finally getting Em to agree to take one down to show Bella I stepped up behind her and pulled her into my chest. I couldn't help but notice the change in her scent. The freesia was still there although it was now very faint. It was more mint and vanilla. It was an interesting and intoxicating mixture that reminded me of home. I couldn't say why but I was instantly comforted by it. Without any time to really think on it I began to explain the hunt to Bella, who turned out to be a natural at it. Feeling better then I had in days I joked and played around with Emmett all the way back to the house.

~*~

It was a rare clear night here in Forks. The air was cool with a slight breeze, really it was the perfect fall night. Looking up at the stars I reclined on to my back, not having to worry about the roughness of the shingles that lined the roof. It had been a long time since I felt the need to be up here. The roof was normally the spot I run to when I needed to get away from my family for a bit. It was a small part of my human years that I brought with me to this life. Growing up the roof was always the escape from two very tired parents and two younger sisters who never seemed to shut up. The roof was the one place they wouldn't follow me to and I had spent a lot of time up there.

Tonight though I just needed some fresh air to breathe. It had been two days since Bella woke up and the house had been tense, most likely because of Alice and I. No one really knew how to act around us. We were trying to be friends or siblings or something other then awkward but it was hard on the both of us. I still didn't understand why she wouldn't at least try to work things out but she insisted.

My mind drifts back to the night of Bella's birthday. I still can't believe I forgot to go hunting that day. I had been so good up until then to always hunt on days she would be at the house. Naturally the day I forget she would spill blood, even if it did begin with only a drop. Afterward Edward had asked that we all leave until I could be controlled. We had went rounds, Edward and I, about that, or well, about how he worded what he wanted. It wasn't until I had gone hunting that I could see things from his point of view. I left with out argument after that, even though I still thought he was way wrong for wanting us gone. Alice was very quiet the entire drive up there. That was very unlike Alice. When ever I would ask if she was ok she would just nod her head that she was fine and continue to stare out the window. Then once we got to the house in Alaska she finally opened up, only it wasn't what I was expecting.

"_Jasper, we need to talk."_

"_What is it Ali?" I asked looking up from the trunk of the car. We had just arrived at the house and I had wanted to get all Alice's clothes in before dark, not like it really mattered, but I wanted the entire night to relax after the drive._

"_Jasper, I, um, you see the thing is..." She was stumbling over her words, that was strange. Alice was a strong, confident, woman. She didn't stumble over what she was going to say, hell she had probably seen what she would say, what the hell could be making her stumble? With a deep breath she closed her eyes "Jasper I want a divorce."_

_My jaw dropped. I stopped breathing. I just froze. She wanted WHAT?!?_

"_Jasper?" She had opened her eyes and I didn't need my power to see the worry in them. "I'm sorry." She all but whispered to me. _

"_Alice, what...what..." I took a deep breath and it was my turn to close my eyes, cut off the connection between us. "Why?"_

_I felt her come and sit next to me on the bumper of the car. With a deep breath she began. "I'm not happy Jasper. I don't think I have been for a while now. When we left now was when I realized it though. I was more worried about Bella and to an extent Edward then I was you. That's not fair to you. You should have been my main worry, my main concern. But you weren't. You hardly crossed my mind." I felt her hand on my forearm and opened my eyes to look at her. "I looked into the future Jasper and no matter what I did today I did not see us together for much longer."_

"_But Alice, you are my world. If there is something I could do differently you just need to tell me. Baby, I don't want to be with out you. We can work this out, I know we can. I had been doing so well before, and up until the party I didn't even have the desire once to try and kill Bella. We have already been through so much, please Alice, don't give up on us." I turned around and sat next to her I felt like I was in a haze. I looked into Alice and felt a great sadness but also a strong determination. I wasn't going to win this fight and that scared the hell out of me. Could I live with out Alice?_

We had sat out at the car for most of the night just talking things through but my first feeling was right. I did not win that fight. I promised to sign the paperwork once Alice had it together and we would try to be friends for the family. Everyone was understanding and had done their best to keep out of our discussion and give us space. After a day of being their though I knew I needed to leave. It was just to hard to be there with her right then. I had been a part of Alice & Jasper for so long and always while with the Cullens that I just didn't know how to act, how to be me, especially around them. Now that we were thrust back together after such a short time apart it was proving to be just as difficult. Everyone it seemed was walking on eggshells when ever the two of us were in the same room except Bella. Bella just treated us the same as before, that is, when she was around.

After her first hunt Bella retreated into one of the spare guest rooms on the third floor and has hardly come out. She has made sure to go hunting every day but other then that she just quietly sits in her room. She hasn't spoken to anyone yet about what happened. Rose went to her and told her story hoping to get her to open up and Carlisle has tried several times to get her to come out and talk to him but all she says is that she didn't want to talk about it yet. He even tried to get Esme on her once to see if maybe Bella would talk to her instead. Emmett and I just hid around the corner and tried to be quiet as we listened to Esme rip Carlisle up one side and down the other. We made it to just after the "you need to be respectful" line before we lost it and started laughing. Our laughter didn't last long as we were the next targets of Esme's wrath.

Smiling at the memory I couldn't help but laugh. Esme was still angry with Emmett about breaking the window and didn't bother to reel that anger back any when yelling at me for eavesdropping. Sure we could have heard them from anywhere in the house but apparently that was besides the point. Still quietly laughing to myself I heard someone behind me. Turning around I was surprised to see it was Bella.


	3. Chapter 3 Memories

**AN: This was a hard one for me to finish and it didn't end where I wanted it to but it just felt right to cut it where I did, anything more just ended up feeling to long winded and I don't need any help with that. **

**Let me know what you think!**

**As always, thank you to all readers, reviewers, and alerters, I figured out how to respond to reviews with the last chapter and tried to respond to everyone, if I missed you I am sorry, please believe your review was important to me. Also I own nothing.**

**Chapter 3 - Memories**

**JPOV**

She was just standing there looking startled. I guess she wasn't expecting anyone else to be up here. Can't say as I blame her, I wasn't exactly expecting anyone else to show up here either. I watch as she opens her mouth and looks like she is going to say something but then just shuts it again. After the third attempt I start to feel bad for her and with a flash of a smile I made the quick decision to invite her to sit with me. She and I were never close but not because I didn't want to be. More that I did, I just couldn't trust myself not to eat her; it might be nice to spend some time with her now that her being my dinner was no longer an issue. If I was honest with myself though, I just really wanted a friend and Bella always seemed to make friends with everyone. Hopefully I wouldn't be the exception.

"Needed some fresh air as well Bella?" She returns my smile with a nod of her head and I pat the spot next to me, a silent request for her to join me. This side of the roof has the best view after all. She sits next to me, curling up into herself, and we just sit in silence, each lost in our own thoughts, staring at the stars. Hours passed before the silence was broken.

"Why did you come back Jasper?"

Startled by the question I looked over at her. She was still all curled up in a ball, her chin resting on her knees, with her arms tight, locked around her legs. A full on defensive position. It wasn't hard to tell that she was feeling vulnerable and probably a little scared, although I wish my power worked with her so I knew for sure. I guess the truth would be the best regardless of what ever it is she wants to hear. I bring my eyes to hers and take a deep breath. "Honestly Bella, I came to find you and Edward." Her eyes flashed at his name but she did not flinch, I was still trying to get clues as to what happened to her, even if those clues didn't actually tell me anything. Finally looking away from her and back to the stars I figured now was as good a time as any to do what I first set out to do. "I was leaving the Cullens and wanted to apologize to you both before I made my way south. The way I behaved at your party, well, I wasn't at my best and I feel horrible about it. I hated the fact that I was, yet again, the reason the family had to pull up steaks and leave but for once the person I attacked was still around for me to ask forgiveness from. I know that I don't deserve it but..."

"Stop Jasper. Please, it's fine. It wasn't your fault, I forgave you before you were even out of the house." Looking back to her I saw her pull her bottom lip into her mouth, slightly biting it, as she thought something through. Then I felt it. I felt her forgiveness and trust. My eyes widened and I couldn't help the sharp intake of breath and she flashed a grin. "It worked then? You felt that? I figured that it was when I didn't want you to feel my emotions and pain that you couldn't anymore so if I did want you to feel them then you could!" With a smirk she sent out smugness. My laugh was out before I even realized it.

"That's a pretty impressive gift Bella. You know Alice can't see your future anymore or anyone who is around you. You think it's the same thing that kept Edward out of your head?" She just shrugs but couldn't help the smile when I whispered, "Carlisle is going to want play around with that you know."

"Well he will just have to wait, I don't feel like being a test subject just yet. How long do you think I can use being a new born to hold him off?" She was full on grinning now and had relaxed her ball form to stretch her legs out in front of her.

"I don't know. But after your new born stage you can always just go for the rebellious teen attitude." And that got her to laugh. She needs to laugh more, it is an amazing sound. Light but so full of emotion at the same time.

"Well if that is the next stage I must already be there. I've already started sneaking out my bedroom window to hang out with some boy on the roof all night."

"Some boy? So I'm just some boy to you, huh?" I pretended to be offended but the smile I was fighting won. She just bumped her shoulder into mine with a mutter that sounded suspiciously like _shush you_. With a chuckle I decided to bring the conversation back around to more serious topics. "So why did you come up here tonight?" She took a deep breath and pulled her knees back up but didn't lock her arms around her legs. That was at least progress. She wasn't completely shutting me out, even if she didn't end up opening up to me tonight.

"The fresh air helps me to think. I would have rather gone for a walk in the woods but I didn't think you all would let me do that alone." She shot a small smile to me to let me know she was, at least partly, joking. "But really I just needed to relax a little. It has been a bit stressful in the house, in case you've missed it."

Shaking my head at her I replied, "No, I have not missed that. Actually that is the same reason you found me here. In reality it is probably my fault it is so bad in there. Sorry."

"Why on earth would it be your fault?"

"No one seems to know just how to act around me these days, add Alice to the same room and it gets even worse. Ever since...well, lets just say that the past few weeks have been a bit rough for me." With a sigh I broke off our eye contact, looking down to the roof as I prepared myself to continue. "When Alice asked me for a divorce I didn't really take it well. It kind of came out of left field for me; no one else seemed as surprised however. Today was especially difficult because I had to sign the paperwork. Make it official. I had also received my new paperwork with my name change. Carlisle had asked that I take my original last name for a while." By the time I was finished I was speaking at barely a whisper. I knew why he didn't want me to carry the well known name of Cullen while I wasn't with them and his lack of faith in me hurt. A lot. Even if it was, at least somewhat, warranted. Still looking at the roof I started to pick at the shingles between my feet, resting my arms on my bent knees. "I just don't really understand I guess. I know that I am far from perfect but to not even try...it just seems like she was tossing me aside when her visions no longer showed me in them. Like she lived for her visions more then for me." I could feel the burn in my eyes at this point. Very few times have I ever wished for the ability to cry but this was one of them. I felt Bella slowly reach over and put her palm on my back as she started to rub large, calming, circles across it. Glancing over she gave me a small, sad, smile as I placed my hand on her knee and gave a squeeze to let her know I appreciated the touch. "If I am honest with myself though Bella, it hurts just as much, if not more, that the rest of the family could see that things were different between us and no one said anything or even just asked if we were ok. Or, at least, no one ever asked me."

I was fighting sobs so hard by this point that I just couldn't continue. Closing my eyes I tried to take deep breaths to try and force myself to calm down. I don't know why I just unloaded all that. And on Bella no less. I wasn't one for sharing personal stuff like that, much less to someone I hardly knew. My fight to rein in my emotions was all for nothing though when I felt Bella reach over and pull me to her. Wrapping her arms around me she tucked my head into the crook of her neck and let me feel her sorrow and understanding for me. I lost it. There was just something about Bella that made me so comfortable I could just let it all out and not worry about her judging me or giving me a hard time about it later.

I don't know how long we sat there like that, me, an emotional wreck, wrapped up in Bella's arms as she rocked slowly back and forth, whispering encouragements, and never ceasing to rub those circles on my back, but when the sky began to brighten with the next day's dawn I pulled back. Looking up into a pair of glistening red eyes that would clearly be crying as well if they could, I tried to give her a small smile. "Thank you Bella. I'm sorry I broke down on you."

She responds with a smile of her own as she sent me another wave of understanding, but this time added friendship and hope. "Anytime, after all, what are friends for?"

She want's to be friends with me after that? She really is something else. "Friends huh? I thought I was just some boy..." Her laughter rings out just as the sun peaks over the horizon causing us both to break out into our diamond like sparkles.

"Well alright then _Boy_. Why don't you take me hunting before we are both get caught sneaking out?" With a smirk and a wave of mischievousness she stands up and turns back to me, "Are you game or not?" With that she jumped from the roof and took off to the woods. I see her pause at the forest line and look up to me. With a grin I follow her lead by jumping off the roof and take off after her.

~*~

Bella had gotten better at picking out what animals were what and where they were. After we each got a bear I managed to goad her into trying a squirrel. It was worth the payback of getting pushed into the river after she realized it was a set up. She will be tasting that nastiness for hours! My only regret was that Emmett wasn't here to see the look on her face. I got pushed back into the river after I was stupid enough to tell her that.

We laughed and joked around for most of the morning out in the woods. It was great just being able to let go and have fun. I can't remember when I have laughed this much. I was really enjoying this side of Bella, her playful, childish side. I can see why she and Emmett get along so well, they each can find great amusement in the simplest things. I had a feeling that being friends with Bella would not just be emotionally rewarding but also a lot of fun.

Our relaxing morning was all cut short however when my phone buzzed from my pocket.

**Keep Bella away from the house. Charlie is here and he is PISSED. Thanks to Em's big mouth he thinks Bella ran away with Edward and that we helped them get away. Will keep you updated.**

**~R**

My jaw just dropped after reading that. What the fuck did Emmett do? When Bella realized I wasn't following her anymore she wandered back over to me. "What's up Boy?" I just handed her the phone as I ran a hand though my hair. It would be easier the explaining it. "WHAT?!? He thinks I ran away with EDWARD?" Before I could stop her she threw the phone through the woods, thankfully missing any trees. With a sigh I just looked between her and the direction of the flying phone. After a few breaths she realized what she did I guess because she looked to the ground and mumbled an apology.

Turning to where I hoped we could find the stupid phone I looked over to Bella and reached out to take her hand. "Whats up sweetheart, why the harsh reaction? It would be an understandable assumption if Em mentioned Edward was missing as well as you." I asked while tugging her up next to me. Once she was close enough I dropped her hand to wrap my arm around her shoulders, pulled her close, and started walking.

She sighed and I could tell she was trying to figure out how to say what she wanted to. "I just don't want Charlie to think I ran away to be with..._him._"

"_Him _nowhuh?" I didn't want to push her but I did want to know what happened. Ok, so I really wanted to push and even beg her to tell me what happened to her but I knew that pushing would get me no where but further away from the truth. So far I have pretty much decided that it was Edward who bit her but why is still a mystery. Em and Rose agree with me. Alice, Esme, and Carlisle though are holding out and don't think he could have, not only bit her, but then just leave her behind. However, they didn't have an answer for me as to who else it could have been. She hasn't said a word yet though to anyone about it and sneaking a sideways glance at her now she looks nervous. Stopping our forward progress I push her in front of me while spinning her to face me while I bring my hands up to frame her face, basically making her look at me. "Bella, sweetheart, listen to me. If you don't want to tell me now, or ever for that matter, that is fine. Just know that if you ever do want to talk about whatever he did to you, I will be here for you. All joking aside I really want to be your friend, and just like you said earlier, friends are there for each other." I pulled her into my chest for a hug and felt her shaking in silent, tearless, sobs. Holding her in my arms I realized just how long it had been since I had hugged someone. I mean really hug someone. It felt good. Really good.

I was interrupted from trying to figure out just how long I had gone with out giving a decent hug by Bella's soft voice.

"I'm worried to tell you what happened. I don't want to be the reason the family is torn apart. I am afraid that by telling you what he did that is what will happen and then I will be alone again."

"Don't worry about that Bella. We will work it out one way or another, I promise. And I promise that whatever happens, I won't leave you until you get tired of me. Ok Sweetheart? Anyway, I kind of already took care of tearing the family apart thanks to my divorce." I gave her a smile to let her know I was trying to joke with her about it. She just looked up at me with glossy eyes and let out a deep sigh. I guess it really wasn't a good joke but she must have at least realized my attempt at breaking up the tension a little because she next used her new nickname for me, the one that I am rapidly growing to hate.

"Alright Boy. Here it goes, try not to interrupt, you hear?" With my nod she began. "He was acting different ever since the party. He didn't come to my room that night. When he picked me up for school he was distant and distracted. When I asked about where Alice was all he said was that she was out with you. He wouldn't say anything else about the rest of you. He never even told me you all had already left. He wouldn't hold my hand at school and hardly even spoke to me. I gave him his space that day thinking he just needed to process what happened. Then he didn't come to my room that night either. When he was still distracted the next day I got angry. I yelled at him before school. He didn't even say a word to me. I ignored him the rest of the day, or at least I tried. How can you ignore someone who was already ignoring you?"

By this point she was barley whispering. I hated the heartbroken and lost tone in her voice. Looking around quick I spy a log that was the perfect height to lean against while sitting on the ground. Pulling her with me I sit and tug her into my lap and rest her head on my chest while I lean mine so that my cheek is on her forehead. Taking a cue from what she did to comfort me last night I start rubbing large circles on her back. After a few deep breaths she continues, a little stronger.

"By the third day I was done with what ever game he was playing. He wouldn't look at me and hardly spoke to me. After school he asked if he could come over to the house to talk. I was excited. I thought maybe he had finally realized that everything was ok, that nothing had happened to me, and I was fine. Charlie was working late. He said that he would probably have to stay overnight working on an animal mauling so we would have the house to ourselves to talk things out. It turns out that his version of working things out was to break up with me."

It took everything I had to hold in the growl that was forming and not to interrupt her story. I knew she needed to get it all out now that she had started and my interruptions would not help her any.

"After me trying everything I could think of short of agreeing not to be changed, he left. I tried to follow him but he ran into the woods and it was already dark. I ran in after him anyway and soon got lost. It was around 3:00 in the morning when I found my way out and back home. I was soaked and shaking, probably had hypothermia at that point, but I didn't even notice. I just needed to see him, had to find a way to get him to stay. So I jumped into my truck and drove to your house. He was still there, packing up his stuff to leave. He was furious at me for letting myself get so cold and wet. His temper flared. It was the first and only time I was ever really scared to be close to him. He really looked like a vampire at that moment.

"We were on the front porch and I had tried to back away from him but the stairs were behind me. I fell. It hurt but surprisingly I didn't break anything. I tired to stand up but he just pushed me back down. He pinned me to the ground and started yelling at me. He told me that everything was my fault. That if I hadn't been so clumsy and stupid you all wouldn't have had to leave. He said that the worst mistake he ever made was bringing me home to the family. He said you all hated me and only pretended to like me to try and make him happy and that it was worse now that I forced you to leave. He also said that it was a plan of Alice's to get rid of me by you attacking me at my party. That's why she never said anything, why she claimed not to have had a vision about it"

At this point I couldn't hold in the growl. That asshole! How dare he say those things to her, the mother fucker! The family loved her; beyond a doubt they all loved her so much. Especially Alice. Bella lifted her head from my shoulder and cupped my cheek with her hand, moving my head so that I was looking into her eyes. "Jasper, listen to me. I don't believe him. I kind of did when he said it, I won't lie, I always thought I wasn't good enough to belong to your family, but I knew the moment you spoke to me while I was changing that it wasn't true." She sent me a wave of gratitude, trust, and affection. I quieted down and gave her an apologetic smile, I really had tried not to interrupt. I must have been projecting my guilt because she gave me a true smile, trying to cheer me up. "No worries, I know you were holding back for a while. Really, I'm not surprised that it came out then, but just to warn you, that wasn't the worst part." My eyes must have gotten larger because she just gave me a pointed look. Right, she still needed to be bitten by someone. "No more interruptions. I don't know if I'll be able to stop again." I nodded and she tucked her head back into my chest. I felt oddly comfortable sitting here with her like this so I resumed my position, leaning my head on hers and began rubbing the back circles. She took a deep breath started to speak

"He picked me up by my neck and threw me then, all the while yelling at me, telling me that I was nothing more then the family pet. Like a stray dog that you take pity on and feed. He had thrown me, hard, towards the garage and my back collided with the workbench along the back wall. I heard a sickening crack before I saw a flash of bright white and felt the pain. The term 'blinding pain' really isn't made up, pain really can blind you. I tried to move and couldn't, he had broken my spine." I closed my eyes, the venom yet again pushing against them in a vain attempt to escape. No one deserved to be treated like that much less Bella who had nothing but a true, pure, soul.

"I was screaming in pain by then. When he came into the garage he was walking very slow. I was scared Jasper. So very scared. I didn't know what else he would do, what else he would say. I was frozen, crumpled, there on the garage floor. Even without the broken back I would have been frozen in place. When he got up close though he seemed torn. I saw flashes of emotions run across his eyes, each fighting for dominance. When he spoke to me next it was a whisper. Thinking back on it I wonder if he was even talking to me. He said 'Why couldn't you have just let me go? Why did you have to fight me, fight for us? It would have been so much easier.' Then he reached up and brushed my hair from my face, tucking it behind my ear tenderly. However as his hand moved around and cupped my cheek his anger came back. I saw it flash across his eyes as the darkened. His grip became painful and I couldn't help the cry that escaped my mouth as he broke my cheek and jaw.

"Up until this point none of my injures had broken skin. When he broke my cheek however a fragment of bone broke through where he gripped my face. I watched his eyes as they became an even darker black and saw the pure hunger in them. I knew what was coming before I felt his tongue run across where the bone had poked through my skin following the blood running down my cheek and then down to my neck. With as deep a breath as I could take at that moment I closed my eyes and accepted that I was going to die, that Edward was going to kill me. As I felt his lips pull back and his teeth bear down onto my neck I whispered my love to Charlie and my goodbyes to Renee."

I felt Bella sob in my arms and I instinctively tightened my grip around her. My own emotions were fighting each other. Anger was winning out. Edward had better hope not to cross my path anytime soon, I didn't think I would be able to wait long enough to have him answer me why before I ripped him apart and took a zippo to his ass. I felt Bella fist some of my shirt as her breathing evened out. We remained silent as she collected her thoughts. When she did start to speak again I had to strain to hear her.

"As soon as his teeth broke through and he began to drink I could hear him. It must be like what he hears from everyone else. I heard him fighting with himself, trying to reason with himself. My Edward and the Vampire Edward. Vampire Edward was rejoicing at having finally been able to taste me, the girl whose blood sang. My Edward however was all but yelling inside his head, that he couldn't kill me, that I was his first love. It was that thought that really caused me to pay attention though, to what I could hear in his mind. He called me his first love. Meaning he was planning on having a second. Looking deeper my fears were confirmed. Edward did in fact love me but the love running though his mind paled in comparison to the love that I felt for him. I had never captured his whole heart, he only allowed me to have a fraction of it. I think I must have whispered his name then because he stopped drinking from me. I could still hear him fighting with himself but My Edward finally won out. He let go of me and bolted out of the garage. The burning began almost as soon as he let me go. I couldn't move, I just lay there, still crumpled on the garage floor. I just closed my eyes and prayed for it all to end, for the burning to stop and for my heart, the one that once held my love for Edward, to stop ripping open.

"A few hours after he ran off I heard someone come running. I was worried but somehow I knew that it was him and that he was to late to try and kill me, that I was to far into the change. I felt him pick me up carefully and walk me outside the garage and into the house. I felt him climb the stairs and then lay me down on the bed. I heard him whisper to me, a quiet but heartfelt 'I'm sorry' before I heard the bedroom door close quickly followed by the front door. I heard no other noise until you showed up two days later."

I remained quiet. What could I say to make it better, to help? There wasn't a damn thing. I felt Bella tense in my arms so I tightened my grip on her just a little more, knowing I couldn't hurt her but that didn't mean being crushed was comfortable. After an unmeasurable amount of time she began to sit up. Relaxing my grip I let her stand. Reaching down she offers me her hand. As I grip it and stand up she pulls me into a hug and whispers, "Thank you Jasper. Just telling you has helped me so much."

With a small kiss to the top of her head I can't help but repeat her statement from earlier. "Anytime, after all, what are friends for?" Tilting my head so I can see her face she rewarded me with a small smile. It might have been small but I would take what I could get after all that. I was impressed she was able to smile at all. "Come on Bells, lets go find my phone." With a wave of guilt but a small giggle she turned around and began walking to where she threw my phone.

**BPOV**

I felt so much...lighter after being able to get what happened off my chest. I knew I needed to talk about it but I had no idea just how much I was holding back. I could never thank Jasper enough for being there for me and for just being quiet, well, mostly quiet, and letting me get it all out. I still didn't think that I was ready to tell the rest of the Cullens yet but for some reason I just felt so comfortable around Jasper that when he looked me in the eye and told me that he would be there for me whether or not I told him, I just could not hold it in.

A quiet buzz to my right broke me of my thoughts. Looking over I carefully follow the sound until I come across Jasper's cell. "I got it!" Flipping it open I read the last text from Rose as Jasper runs over to my side.

**Charlie left, it is safe for now. Will give you the full story when you get here, hurry.**

**~R**

"Alright Bells, lets head back. You need to hunt on the way."

"But I just ate. I don't feel thirsty hardly at all. I just want to get back and figure out what the hell Emmett did." He laughed at my whiny, childish, tone.

"I know you want to know what Emmett did, trust me, so do I, but Bella, this will be the first time you will have come across the sent of human. It would be best to hunt on the way so that hopefully you don't go all crazy new born on me." With a look that clearly said, 'I might be joking but you don't have a choice so just agree now' he started to run towards the house. I have to agree with him anyway, I don't want to risk hurting anyone.

I run to catch up and as I fly past him I yell back, "Alright Boy, lets go."

"Ugh, hey Bella!" I slow my pace so that he can keep up. "If you insist on giving me a nickname can we _please_ find a new one for me? I hate Boy." I couldn't help but laugh, now who was whining? It didn't surprise me though, I was wondering just how long he would put up with that.

"No problem Jas. I was surprised you let me use it this long." His response? A mature move of sticking his tongue out at me. Laughing I pull away from him and head to the closest prey on the way to the house with the thought that being Jasper's friend was going to be fun if nothing else.


	4. Chapter 4 Red

**AN: This is not the chapter I had set out to write but things just kind of happened and here you have it. Please let me know what you thought!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own it.  
**

**Chapter 4 - Red  
**

**BPOV**

Red. That one color took over all my senses. I could smell it, taste it. I couldn't get enough of it. A small part of my now larger brain power realized that something wasn't quite right, that red did not have a scent or flavor, but that part was pushed so far back from my conscious mind I paid it no heed.

Red was all I could think of. The raw need that was invoked by it was staggering. I had to have it, I needed to feel it coursing, coating my tongue and flowing down my throat. My senses honed in on where this wonder was coming from. I could pinpoint the location with a confidence that I normally did not have, I knew down to the tenth of a millimeter where my meal was.

I was vaguely aware that people were around me. They were yelling and someone was in front of me, holding my arms, trying to stop me from getting to my meal. I couldn't understand why, why would you want to stay away from the wonder that was Red. It made no sense.

Just as I felt who ever was in front of me ripped away, someone else's hand pressed over my mouth and nose. I tried to bite them but they were to fast for me, took me by surprise from behind, their hand was in place before my teeth could connect. I was pushed to the ground and the owner of the hand pinned me down. No matter how much I thrashed around it did no good, I was held fast, my chest pressing into the ground, mouth and nose covered, cut off from the way to find my meal.

I do not know how long I was held to the ground before the red that had so consumed me began to fade, leaving me empty. First the sound, the thump thump thump began to fade. Then it was the smell, red fading away to be replaced with the smell of dirt, grass, and of the forest after a rain. My vision was next, the red tint fading away only to be replaced with a subtle shimmer, like looking through a bubble.

My brain was the last to catch up. I was being held to the ground in front of the house by Jasper. I could see the rest of the family, except for Carlisle, pacing around the yard about twenty feet away. They all stop their movements as I hear a car coming up the drive. The vehicle pulls up and Carlisle steps out. He looks over my head, at Jasper I guess, as he goes to stand with the rest of the family. He gives a small shake of his head and I feel Jasper relax just a fraction above me.

I feel Jasper leaning down and am soon met with the tickle of his breath as he whispers in my ear, "Bella? Can you hear me Sweetheart? Just nod your head if you can." I give a quick shake and he relaxes just a bit more. "Ok, Bella, Sweetheart, I need you to stop breathing. Hold your breath for me. Good. We need to move and get back to the woods. You need to hunt now." I was confused, I had already hunted. We hunted on our way back to the house. "I know you are confused but trust me, you will feel better after you hunted. I will explain everything then, I promise. Now I am going to relax my hold on your back a little and we are going to walk together to the woods. Once we are in the woods I will remove my hand. Ok?" I give a nod, since I didn't really have much choice but to do as he said, and true to his word he relaxed his grip and allowed me to stand.

Looking around I see the shimmer that had covered my vision fade away and I was left with the normal colors of the world. I see the family start to move forward and tense as I feel Jasper shaking his head. They all stop immediately. I feel Jasper steer my body, turning us both towards the woods and we begin to slowly walk towards them. Once we are a small ways into the tree line he stops.

"I am going to remove my hand now Bella. I need you to keep holding your breath though, can you do that for me Sweetheart?" I nod my head and feel his firm grip pull away from my face. Turning to look at him he takes a moment to stare into my eyes, looking for what I don't know. Finally he comes to some sort of decision because he tells me to follow him and reminds me to keep holding my breath.

Soon we come to a herd of deer and he no sooner tells me to eat that I have drained three of them. The satisfaction was not as good as I wanted it to be but I could tell that it took an edge off, an edge I never even realized I had. Looking up I see Jasper leaning against a tree, smiling at me. I go to walk towards him but he just holds up a hand to me, telling me to stop. Confused I just stare at him.

"You need just a bit more Bella. If you wait just a moment though a mountain lion is headed this way, I think you might enjoy those." I couldn't help the smile that crept on my face, even for the short time I have been a vampire I have found that the predators make for far better meals. I make sure not to move and open my senses to see if I could find the cat that Jasper claims is near.

Sure enough, within a few minutes a mountain lion comes creeping around where the three unlucky deers now lay. Letting it get comfortable around the carcases before pouncing on his back I make quick work of the large cat, which was instantly my favorite animal to feed from so far. Once finished Jasper was apparently satisfied that I had enough to eat and came over to help me bury the bodies.

"Follow me, I know where you can go to clean up a little. It won't be a shower but we can't go back to the house just yet. Once you are done I will answer any and all questions you have about what happened, ok?" With a nod of my head he turns and takes off, with me following close behind.

I could hear the waterfall before I could see it. That still didn't prepare me for the beauty of the clearing Jasper took me to. The trees were far enough back that there was a wide strip where the sun was allowed to shine. Wildflowers grew all over and the lush green grass had grown tall. The river was small but had a constant flow, allowing for a small pool at the bottom of the waterfall. I could see the many tracks from wildlife that came here to graze and enjoy the sun. There was a peace and sense of calmness that radiated from this space. Turning to look at Jasper he just smiled at me and pointed to the pool.

"Get yourself cleaned up as best you can. I will be at the top." With that he scaled up the small cliff and disappeared over the top.

Making my way to the small pool I couldn't help but smile. I was still confused and if I was honest with myself a little scared about what happened earlier but looking around it seemed so trivial, unimportant. Taking stock of myself I decide that my clothes needed cleaning up just as much as I did so I stripped down to my underwear, confident that Jasper wouldn't sneak a peek, and rinsed them in the water. Getting as much of the filth and blood out as I could I spread them out on a warm rock where they would hopefully dry a little. Having taken care of that I turned and jumped into the pool. The water was cool and felt incredibly relaxing. Dunking under I scrub at my hair, trying to dislodge the leaves that managed to work their way in, and finger brushed it. It was going to look horrible when it dried but there wasn't much to be done for it. Flipping to my back I lay out in the water and take the time to just swim around and relax. After what was probably a half hour I finally get out of the water and dress in my mostly dry clothes. I might not be able to get cold anymore but dressing in damp clothing? Still uncomfortable as hell.

Quietly making my way up the small cliff I pop over the top and look around. It wasn't very high up, only about 30 feet or so but the view was gorgeous. I could see the tops of trees and while the sun was in and out of the clouds it was warmer. Looking around I spy Jasper, sitting on a flat rock, a small ways upriver, just watching me. Smiling at him I walk over and sit next to him.

"It is beautiful here Jasper. Absolutely beautiful."

"Yes it is. Even in the rain this place seems to be bright and full of life. This is where I came when I needed time away from the family or just wanted to be alone. There is just something about this place that exudes..."

"Tranquility?" I guess. I must have been right because I was rewarded with a large smile.

"Yes, that's it exactly. Now, I am sure you have a lot of questions for me. I will do my best to answer them for you. First though I wanted to let you know that I can feel your emotions again."

With a quick intake of breath I do whatever it is I do and cut them off from him. I don't really know why I kept them to myself, it never bothered me that he could feel them, it just seemed so, personal. I guess that was the Charlie coming out in me, the need to keep everything to myself. I hear him give a small sigh and thought I caught a flash of sadness in his eyes before he looked down to the water flowing around the rock. By the time he looked up again it was gone.

"Alright so start asking away, what did you want to know first?"

Thinking through all my questions, and there were a lot, I figure I should know what happened to me first. Why my world was so consumed by red. "What happened to me?"

"That was your blood lust Bella. That was the wonder that is the scent from a human."

I feel my jaw drop open. "My blood lust? _That _is what you all have to deal with every time you smell a human? How in the hell do you handle it?" He just starts laughing. With a glare at him he quiets it down but doesn't stop. "I don't see where the humor is Jasper but I would like it if you could please explain it to me. Now."

"I'm sorry Bella, I really am. Oh, come on, stop glaring at me." When I showed no signs of letting up he rolled his eyes. "Fine, keep glaring. Yes, that was your blood lust but no, what happened to you is not what we have to deal with all the time. It was just that bad for you because not only are you a new born but that was also your first taste of a human's scent. If you ever come across your singer though it will be twice as bad. All but irresistible." He looked to me with a hard edge to his eyes. I nod my head, showing my understanding at what he was saying about Edward. Really though, I never blamed him for biting me; it was all the other stuff I was angry about.

"The burn of thirst will never truly go away and from my experience some days are better then others. Slowly though, over the next year or so, the lust will wane until it is more of an annoyance, if you hunt regularly. The all consuming _need_ to drink from someone you meet will lessen as well, even if the _desire_ to still remains. If you don't hunt often enough however the strength to resist humans becomes weaker and weaker."

"Why did it happen though? Rose's text had come an hour before we even got to the house and I never even stepped foot inside. Do the scents really stay that strong outside?"

Watching Jasper's reaction he starts fidgeting and acting nervous, looking anywhere but in my eyes. I didn't know if he was projecting or if his mood was just wearing on me but I found myself anxious and worried about what had happened to cause him to react this way. Suddenly his eyes flash to mine.

"Bella? Is everything alright? I can feel you again."

What the hell? I never had to work to keep Edward out and Alice still can't see me. Why can't I seem to block him?

"I don't know either but you have cut them off now." Huh, I must have spoken that last thought aloud. Oops.

"Alright Bella, back on track. This next part is going to be hard for you to hear so I want you to try and stay calm, ok? You asked about why you reacted when the scent should have dissipated, and you were right, you should have been fine outside with Charlie having left over an hour before. The problem was that Charlie had just come back as we were getting back to the house. A gust of wind whipped past, carrying his scent with it. Rose had just been about to send a text warning us to stay away but it was to late. You had already caught it and had taken off towards him."

"NO! Oh, god no! I didn't hurt him did I?!? Oh god." I was getting more and more upset. This couldn't be happening. "I would have remembered hurting him right? We remember everything, I would remember that too. I have to. I don't want to hurt him. I don't want to hurt anyone!" I feel my breathing increase as I slip more and more out of control. I felt it when Jasper took a hold of my shoulders and shook. I could hear him calling my name, telling me to calm down but it all felt so far away. I just shake my head. I didn't want to hurt anyone. I don't want to hurt Charlie!

It wasn't until I was enveloped in the cold water that I realized Jasper had thrown me into the river. Sputtering I stand and look at Jasper who is now standing on the rock with his arms folded over his chest. His eyes had a hard edge to them and were demanding. "What the hell Jas? Why on earth did you toss me in here? I think I have a right to get upset. You just told me I went after my FATHER! I swear Jas if I..."

"Bella! Listen to me God damn-it!" While his voice held a commanding tone I could hear the care in it as well. I stopped speaking immediately. "You did NOT hurt him. You didn't even make it close enough to try. Ok?" He unfolded his arms and stooped down so that we were eye level. Reaching out to take my hand I allow him to help be back up on the rock. Reaching up to frame my face his expression softens as does his tone. "Bella, Sweetheart, I told you before that I would do anything in my power to keep you from hurting anyone and I meant it. Now come on, lets sit and I will tell you the whole story." Nodding my head I retake my seat next to Jasper and patiently wait for him to continue when he sighs again. He runs a hand through his blond hair before whispering, "You got distracted again." I must have looked confused because he immediately continues "Your emotions Bella."

I wave my hand at him. "Oh fuck it. I am tired of trying to block you, just deal with them." His eyes grow large at my choice of language but he recovers quick with a huge grin. It really must have bothered him that I was cutting them off. Still, I wonder why I was having such a hard time with it, I blocked Edward before I even knew what he was and I started blocking Alice the night I was bitten.

"Ok Bells, try not to get upset this time." I take a deep breath, closing my eyes, and just nod my head. I will feel so much better just knowing what happened. "When we came out of the forest Charlie was getting out of his car. The wind chose that moment to gust, carrying his fresh scent right to us. I tried to grab a hold of you but you were to fast. You took off right for him. Running to catch up I see Emmett step in front of you, trying to block your path. You ran right into Em, knocking him to the ground. He jumped up just before you got past him though and grabbed a hold of your arms. I finally catch up and am able to get my hand around your nose and mouth just as Emmett appeared to be ripped away from you, landing about 20 feet away. Knocking you to the ground I manage to pin your arms and hold you there.

"While all that was going on Carlisle had taken Charlie back to his car. Tossing him in he drove him...away. I am not sure where he took him now that I think about it, but it doesn't matter. He got Charlie away. I do not know what he was told so don't ask, Carlisle will have to explain that one, but I do know he saw you.

"Now, I have some questions for you but first, do you have any more about what happened?"

I felt a relief that Jasper and Emmett had managed to stop me. I don't think I could ever forgive myself if I had hurt Charlie, out of it or not. Thinking through the explanation I could only think of one question. "What made Emmett go flying away? It felt like he was being ripped away from me."

I hear Jasper sigh. "Damn, I was going to ask you if you knew. After it happened we were in some kind of bubble. Do you think it could have been this mind shield that you seem to have? You were always able to block Edward and seem to be able to block Alice without effort. If it blocks your mind it stands to reason that it could also manifest into a physical shield as well. That is my theory anyway."

Thinking about it a shield, both mental and physical, would make a lot of sense except for...

"That sounds great Jasper, but what about you? I can't seem to block your power with out thinking about it and you were in the bubble with me while Emmett was thrown back."

"I don't know. We should ask Carlisle about it. Maybe he has an idea. Either way that is a pretty cool power to have."

I just shrug, something was telling me that a shield wasn't quite it, that there was more or maybe that it was just different. Before I could really think on it though Jasper's cell rings.

"Hello Carlisle."

"_Jasper. How is Bella doing?"_

"Much better now. I just got finished telling her what happened. Is it safe to come home now?"

"_Yes. There is quite a bit we all need to discuss. How long before you can get here?"_

"About a half hour. See you in a few."

"_See you then. And Jasper? Make sure you hunt on your way back as well. I have a feeling that we will be needing your power quite a bit for this."_

"Uh, ok. I will. Is everything alright, did something happen?"

"_Edward called." _


	5. Chapter 5 Stories

**AN: Thanks again to all the readers and reviewers! Hopefully you enjoy this chapter. As always, please review and let me know what you think!**

**For everyone who celebrates Thanksgiving, have a good holiday! To everyone else, have a good Thursday!!  
**

**Chapter 5 – Stories**

**JPOV**

The tension in the room was palpable. Everyone was just sitting here, looking around at each other. It would seem that no one wanted to start, or maybe no one knew where to start. The whole fucking day was just nothing but one issue after another. About the only good thing that came from today was my friendship with Bella. I wasn't sure what it was about her but I felt so comfortable around her I was actually able to let go, be more of the me that I can remember from my human years. I can't remember the last time when I had smiled so much, even in the middle of all the drama. Especially in the middle of the drama.

Feeling a pair of eyes watching me I look up to see that it was Alice. She was looking between me and Bella, who was sitting on the floor in front of me, between my legs. She was sending out curiosity, hope, and affection. I really wanted to know what was running through her head right now, why she was feeling that combination of things. Sometimes I really hated being able to feel others emotions and not knowing _why_ they were feeling them; I always just ended up with more questions than answers. Honestly, it was annoying as fuck.

Finally, feeling some determination from Carlisle I look away from my ex-wife, who was now smirking at me, and look towards my father, who I suddenly realized, probably doesn't know that I think of him as one. I really should actually tell him that someday soon.

Thankfully I was broken from my random thought train before it could go to far off track. I was having issues focusing for some reason. "Alright, I really don't know where to begin. It has been a rather eventful day." With a sigh he looked around at all of us. I had to stifle a laugh, eventful doesn't really seem to cover it. "If no one has any objections I guess we should start at the beginning, lets try to leave any questions for the end, again, we have a lot to cover." When no one objected he continued.

"Bella, Jasper, you two had been gone for a while when Chief Swan arrived. He was rather angry because Bella had been missing school. He was under the impression that she was staying here with Alice while he had to work overtime on the animal mauling case. Alice had been in the living room when he arrived playing video games with Emmett. When they overheard Charlie ask to speak with Bella, Emmett yelled out that she wasn't here, which just made him even angrier. Because Alice had been seen we were unable to us her as an alibi so we claimed that you, Jasper, went with Bella to Port Angeles, to a book store there and we didn't expect you back for quite a while.

Charlie didn't believe us. He was saying that we were acting strange, hiding something. Then he asked where Edward was. Emmett, again without thinking before speaking, exclaimed that we had not heard from him since just after Bella's birthday. Coincidentally that also happens to be the last time that Charlie had seen Bella and the last time Bella had attended School. He jumped to conclusions and assumed we were hiding the fact that Bella and Edward ran away together. When Emmett began laughing and said _'That would so be something they would have done!'_ however, was when he stormed out, having taken Emmett's statement as confirmation of his thoughts."

I had been watching Bella's emotions through the entire story. What had started out as annoyance had quickly turned to anger as she processed just what Emmett had said to her father. She had finally reached her breaking point with his last comment though. Looking at Emmett, he was cringing down in his seat, shame and guilt rolling off of him. When he didn't hear Bella's yells however he looked up and met her eyes.

Looking between the two of them I was glad not to be in his shoes. I never want to be on the receiving end of the ice cold stare Bella was giving him. Then she spoke and I couldn't stop the shutter that ran through my body. Never make this woman mad. Ever.

"How could you have said that to him Emmett. He is my **_Father_**. How would you expect him to take that kind of statement?" She spoke so quietly you had to strain to hear her. Her voice was even and solid however, never once hesitant and it commanded you. It was a voice you wanted to run from but that had you frozen in place.

Emmett's emotions were just flowing out from him in torrents. I tried to send some calm out to him but he was to wrapped up in his guilt and shame to take much notice.

"I'm so sorry Bells. Really I am. I was just nervous because he was here looking for you and I didn't think. I...um...I..." He was barley whispering by the end. I knew Bella would forgive him, it was Emmett after all, and I could feel the deep love she felt for him. He couldn't feel that though and his fear rose as Bella stayed quiet, just sitting there, staring at him.

"Emmett, I forgive you," Emmett's head shot up and he went to talk. Bella just held her hand out to him, palm forward, stopping him. "That doesn't mean I am not still mad at you, just that I forgive you. Give me a bit of time to cool off about it though." Emmett relaxed back on the loveseat next to Rose and nods. Bella dropped her hand and nods to Carlisle to continue. Her emotions were still in a torrent, never settling on one for more then a fleeting moment. Putting my hand on her shoulder I give her a gentle squeeze, hoping to comfort her at least a little, the drama isn't over yet.

"It was about a half hour after Charlie left that Rose sent you the text to come home. It was about an hour after that when we heard a car pull up the drive and everyone rushed outside. As soon as we realized who it was Rose was sending you a text. He was getting out of the car when we hear Bella's growl. Emmett was quick enough to step in her way as I grabbed Charlie and ran to my car, which was parked facing out. I was not fast enough that Charlie didn't see or recognize Bella however. By the time we reached his house he had put today's events together with all the other little interactions he has had with us and figured it out. I asked him if he would be alright to stay alone if I promised to come back with Esme in a short while to answer all his questions. It took some convincing and I allowed him to call Billy Black from the reservation but he did eventually agree to stay at the house. Immediately returning home I find Bella pinned to the ground by Jasper, both in some kind of bubble that the rest of the family couldn't even get close to. After confirming to Jasper that Charlie was safely away you two got up, the bubble slowly retracted back to you both and you ran off into the forest."

He looked to me as he finished. I guess he wants to know our side. I hated having to speak at these stupid family meetings. I always feel like I am on trial. Weird? Yes but whatever, that is just how it feels. I clear my throat and get on with it, telling them of our rather uneventful time in the forest, which took all of three minutes. I don't know what they were expecting but really. I took her hunting, explained what happened to her, she freaked, I got to toss her ass in the river, which I can admit I probably enjoyed more then I should have, and then we got the call from Carlisle.

At this point I was having to push calm out to everyone. Everyone was feeling some level of anxiety and worry. It was making me kind of jumpy but no one really knew what to expect so I could understand. The family knew about Edward's phone call and, based on the strength of their worries, it was not a pleasant one. I knew Bella's story. Both were about to be disclosed.

Bella and I had discussed it on the run home and agreed that she needed to tell them her story, ready or not. I had made sure she knew she didn't need to necessarily go into the detail that she did when telling me but that they needed at least the cliff notes. We had also agreed that she should wait to hear what the phone call was about before telling them and then, based on that, she could decide just how detailed her story should be. I had also told her that I would support her as best as I could and wouldn't let Carlisle try and strong arm her into telling first, not that he would mean any harm, he is just to curious for his own good sometimes. Not knowing what happened to Bella has been driving him up the fucking wall.

"Before we get to, um, Edward's phone call, I'm sure you want to know how Charlie is holding up Bella." Her eyes lit up and I felt her relief as Carlisle continued speaking. "Shortly after you two left, Esme and I went to return Charlie's cruiser back to speak with him. Charlie had indeed called Mr. Black who was there when we arrived. He had brought with him Sam Uley, one of the members of the tribe. Mr. Black was, well, lets just say he was less then thrilled about Bella having become a vampire."

We were interrupted by Bella's growl and muttering that sounded much like _fucking asshole needs to mind his own business_. She was feeling a lot of irritation and annoyance. What ever her relationship was with Billy Black, Bella was not happy with him now. Everyone was just kind of looking at her so I leaned over and whispered in her ear, "Bella? You ok Sweetheart?" I tried to send her some extra calm when she seemed to snap out of it, shaking her head and looking up.

"Er, um...sorry about that. Continue Carlisle, please." Carlisle slowly nodded his head and I went to lean back when Bella shifted and griped my hand, which was resting on her shoulder. Looking up at me I sense her apprehension and unease and see the slight look of fear in her eyes. Giving her a quick nod I scoot to the edge of the sofa and drape my arms on either side of her, lightly stroking her arms. I feel her lean back, relaxing just a bit, and send me a wave of thanks. I look up at Carlisle just as he picks back up.

"Once Billy had calmed down Charlie asked to know what had happened, if it was Edward, if this was what Bella wanted, why she came after him. I told them that Bella had been attacked and that turning her was the only way to save her. I explained why it was she had attacked him and that it would probably be at least a year before he could see her but that he was more then welcome to call. Charlie seemed to accept that but Billy looked to have doubts. Sam just looked uncomfortable to be there.

After some more general questions which I answered as truthfully and completely as I could, Charlie told us that there was a situation down at the reservation we should be aware of. Billy went off again about how it wasn't our place to know their secrets but Charlie was adamant. I had been honest with him so he felt they should be honest with us. Some of the boys down at the reservation had begun to turn into wolves."

There was a collective gasp at that news, including from me. I think the only person who didn't react was Bella, who showed only amusement. When I looked down at her, she just shrugged and said "What? If their legends were true about you that only stands to reason that them being wolves would be true too. Come on Jas, I thought you were smart." Shaking my head in quiet laughter I muttered '_smart-ass'_, which earned a smirk form Bella and a smack on the head from Esme. Before I could get myself into more trouble, I turned my attention back to Carlisle, who was waiting for us to pay attention before continuing.

"Sam is the pack leader and as of right now there are only three, including him. It was why Billy had asked Sam to come along. We spoke a little with Sam and agreed to keep them all in the loop about what we were doing and how Bella was adjusting as well as amending the treaty. Charlie asked to let you know Bella that he loves you and if you need anything to give him a call." I could feel Bella's love for her father and her sadness at not having been able to say goodbye. She held up pretty well though, all things considered. After we get this mess sorted out I will have to give her my phone so she can call him. Better yet, someone should run into town and get her her own phone. She is a Cullen after all and we all have a phone. It comes in handy and really, we are all gadget nuts. It comes with our never ending life and an all but unlimited bank account. I hear good things about the new Google phone, and they have fixed a lot of the issues the iphone. Maybe she would rather have a blackberry instead. Then again this is Bella, she would probably just want the simplest one available, that is if she even lets me get her one.

"What do you think of that plan Jasper?"

My head shoots to Carlisle. What was he talking about? Crap, I hadn't been paying attention. Why can't I seem to concentrate today? I never have this much trouble keeping on task, it is the solder in me. Especially at these family meetings. They are so much like debriefings that I can't help but pay close attention to...

"Jasper?" He sounded irritated.

"Shit." I hear Bella giggling at me, if I could blush I swear I would be reduced to it right about now. Sneaking a glance around the room, sure enough everyone is looking at me like I grew another head. "Sorry, Carlisle. I was, um, a bit distracted and didn't hear what you asked." Bella was still giggling, I caught Alice's eye and sent a silent plea for help but she just started laughing with Bella. Then Emmett and Rose lose the fight as well. Glad to see my being on the spot is so amusing to everyone. A loud sigh brings me eyes and thoughts back to Carlisle.

"Well, Jasper, we were just discussing that we need to have a plan to explain Bella's disappearance. We had thought that maybe an accident would work. It would give the town and Renee a chance to say goodbye. A car accident on the way home from Port Angeles was what was suggested."

"Hmm..." Taking a moment I think about it. It might work but Charlie would be put on the spot since he knows the truth and we would still have to explain her being missing the last week. No, a simple accident won't work here. We need something more..."I don't know Carlisle. That would probably have worked yesterday but Charlie knowing the truth kind of throws it off. He will never be able to act as grief stricken as he would have been not knowing. And him not being around for her funeral would fuel the rumor mill even more since she has been missing for a week now. Bella, I know you aren't going to like this, but what if we did use the 'run away' excuse?" Just as I predicted, Bella's growl filled the room.

"Let me explain it this way. No one but Charlie and a few guys from La Push knows we are back. Emmett, Rose, and I are all away at college. When we left last week Carlisle already gave the excuse of a job in California that was just to good to pass up so he was leaving immediately, taking Esme and Alice with him, and with Edward following a few days after. We could start a rumor and have Charlie follow it up that Edward broke things off with Bella, she got upset and ran away. It's not as clean a break as an accident would have been and will unfortunately leave Renee with some hope of seeing Bella again but in a few months we can arrange something. This would give Charlie time to be able to come to terms with Bella being a vampire, hopefully making the funeral not quite so hard to act through."

Carlisle looked thoughtful for only a minute before nodding and, while Bella had stopped growling, she still did not look very happy. "You bring up some good points Jasper. Does anyone have any better suggestions? I would hate leaving Renee some hope that Bella would come home." When no one said anything I heard a sigh from Bella and felt her resolve. She at least understands the reason behind the plan and will go along with it, even if she doesn't particularly care for it. Carlisle's voice cut through my next thoughts however, "Then when we are done here I will call Charlie and clear things with him. Now, we have one more big thing to discuss." He took a deep breath and I could feel that he was very anxious. Even Bella's story aside this must not be good. He looked to Bella before continuing.

"I know you have been reluctant to share what happened to you Bella, but I feel that it has come time for you to at least tell us something. Will you do that?"

She glances up quickly at me as I moved my hand up to her shoulder and gave a small squeeze of support. This is not going to be easy on her. "I will at least give you a summary, Carlisle. I do not think I am ready to retell it again completely, if I ever will be. Please though, will you tell me about his..." I could feel her anxiety and sorrow spike, giving her shoulder another squeeze I send out some confidence and the pride I have for her for being able to get through today's events and still have a rational thought left. I hear her take a deep breath and continue. "Will you please tell me about Edward's phone call first?"

"Of coarse Bella, if that is what you would like." He closed his eyes and took a breath. I felt his determination steel as his eyes opened. "Edward called as Esme and I arrived home from Charlie's. At first he seemed to have called just to let us know he was ok even if he was a bit, distracted. Then as the conversation turned from small talk he asked where we all were. When I hesitated to answer he began to grow angry. He was yelling, asking what I was hiding, when Alice yelled out to Emmett to find out if you were back yet. She used your names. Edward heard." Bella's breath caught. I could feel her fear grow. I tightened my grip on her shoulder as she reached up to grip my hand. If Carlisle noticed her growing fear and worry he didn't acknowledge it and just kept speaking.

"He became furious. He asked why we had come back, if everyone was here. I could hear the anger that laced his voice but under it I could also hear the broken, desperate, tones of someone who was scared. I told him the truth as far as I knew it. That Jasper had come back to find him and Bella only to find that a vampire had bitten Bella and that he, Edward, was no where to be found. Jasper then called us and we all rushed here and have been here since. After that he was quiet for a moment. Then I heard him scream some unidentifiable words in pure fury as the line was disconnected. Alice is still able to see his future and he is on his way here. He was in Europe when he called, last check he was in England, right Alice?"

She nodded and giggled. "That's right Carlisle! He was stuck in some small airport with all the flights out grounded."

I let out the breath that I had been holding. Looking down at Bella I could see that she was working through it. Her emotions were cycling through fear, understanding, anxiety, anger, and guilt. Slowly I push her out from the sofa just a small bit and slide down to the floor behind her. Wrapping my arms around her I pull her back as I rest my chin on her shoulder and whisper, "Bella, Sweetheart, you doing ok?" I feel her emotions sift to include determination and, thankfully, the fear lessened.

She nods her head as she whispers back, turning her head slightly towards me, "Yes, thanks Jas." I go to let her go as her hand stops me, pulling my arms back and hugging them to her. I squeeze her middle to let her know I understood and left my arms around her. She looked up and smiled at Alice. "How long do we have until he gets here do you think?

Alice's eyes glaze over as she looks to Edward's future, the only future she is able to see at the moment. "I would say a day give or take a few hours. He is running to London at the moment and will be able to book a flight tonight to New York."

Bella nodded at this information, took a breath, bracing herself to tell her story. Unfortunately she is going to have to go into more detail then I had hoped. With Edward on his way here they need to know exactly what he did. I wouldn't think he would lie to everyone but then, a week ago, I wouldn't have thought he would attack Bella so brutally either. I rested my chin on Bella's shoulder as she began to speak, hoping she wouldn't mind. I just wanted to be there for her, help her through this.

She was doing well telling her story. She hiccuped a bit in the beginning but was making it though. She wasn't going into detail and was glazing over some parts but she got her point across. Before she was half way through Rose was up and pacing, Emmett growling, Esme and Alice both looked like they would be crying if they could have and Carlisle, well, Carlisle just sat there silent, taking it all in. I knew how hard this would be to hear for him. Edward was his first companion, and he really did think of him as his first son.

Even with all the calm I was sending out, when Bella got to the point where Edward threw her, Rose reached her breaking point. "What the FUCK! How DARE he!?! He thinks it is ok to do THAT? I am going to KILL HIM!" Bella cringed back into my chest as I tightened my hold on her. Everyone else just sat there staring at Rose, not knowing what to say to her. I continued to send her calmness and tranquility but it didn't have an effect. Suddenly she stopped and bent down. Faster then I would have thought possible, even for a vampire, the end table that Rose had stopped in front of went flying through the picture window and crashed in the front lawn.

The sound of glass breaking seemed to wake Emmett up, who was up and hugging Rose to him before the table hit the ground. I could hear his calming words, his reassurances that everything would be ok. After a moment Rose seemed to calm down but before Bella could continue her story Rose spoke.

"Alice? Why didn't you see this happening?" I could tell that Rose didn't blame Alice for not seeing it but the question came out much more like an accusation.

Alice looked like she was about to lose it herself. I could feel the guilt and horror rolling off of her. "I'm....Bella's future...." She let out a sob. Esme moved over next to her, pulling her into a hug. Alice looked up at Bella. "I am so sorry Bella. Really I am. Your future went black, I couldn't see anything. Jasper was on his way so I called him as soon as it happened but I swear, I didn't see any of that happening. Last I saw was you and....and...Edward walking into the woods!"

Bella turned and looked at me so I loosened my grip around her. She slowly got up and walked to where Alice was tucked into Esme's side, looking more like a child then I had ever seen her look. The guilt that Alice was feeling was matched by the rest of the family. They all feel bad for listening to Edward and leaving. There was no way of knowing that this was going to happen but they still felt like they could have prevented it if they had argued and stayed.

Bella was kneeling down in front of Alice and was speaking softly to her. "Alice? Alice, Look at me please." Alice looked up to Bella while staying as close to Esme as she could. "It's not your fault Alice. Don't feel bad, please. There wasn't anything else you could have done. I went after him, I wouldn't let it go. Me, Alice. I don't blame you one bit, I don't blame any of you." She was looking around the room as she spoke that last sentence, her eyes finally locking with my own. I know she had told me she didn't blame me but I couldn't help but feel that my loss of control was the catalyst for this. Almost as though she knew what I was thinking she stressed her thoughts, "NONE of you."

Suddenly Alice launched herself into Bella, hugging her close. "I just don't know why my vision went when it did. He hadn't decided to do anything other then to break things off with you and leave! I don't understand."

Bella took a breath and said quietly, "I think I do."

Carlisle perked up at this point. Up until then he had just been quietly brooding in his own guilt, I assume from letting Edward control the family's decision to leave. "What is it Bella? Do you think it is your power? Your shield?"

Bella just furrowed her brows as she looked at Carlisle. "Shield? You think my power might be a shield?"

"Yes I do Bella. It would explain your ability to block Edward, Jasper, and Alice's powers as well as the strange bubble that you threw around yourself when Emmett was trying to restrain you."

She was feeling confused and disbelief, she didn't think Carlisle was right. "Bella? If you don't agree with Carlisle what do you think?"

"Well my thoughts on why her vision failed when it did is that maybe none of the choices anyone made after that point in time would have altered the outcome. Me following Edward into the woods was the last moment that any decision could change me becoming a vampire. Looking at it that way, if we assume that it is my power blocking Alice, it would make sense that since her power is based on others decisions, the moment I walked into the forest and sealed my fate in becoming a vampire that night, her vision went black."

Huh, that actually made a whole lot of sense. Why hadn't I thought of that?

"As to what my power is, I don't think it is shield. I can't really say _why _I don't think it is, something is just telling me that it is something different, more. Anyway I am not very good at keeping Jasper out, if I lose concentration he is back in. I have given up trying at this point. Add the fact that my bubble didn't throw him away like it did Emmett and then there is the issue of your eye colors, it just doesn't seem to fit the idea of being a shield."

Eye colors? What is she talking about? Looking around I can see everyone else is just as confused as I am. Bella though is just rocking Alice, seemingly unconcerned that none of us have a fucking clue what she is talking about. Since no one else seems like they are going to ask the question, I do.

"Bella? What the hell are you talking about, eye colors?"

Her eyes flash up to mine as she sends me a wave of confusion, quickly followed by understanding. She starts laughing. "I'm so sorry! I never said anything about the eye colors did I? No wonder you all looking at me like I just grew an arm out my forehead!"

We wait, not all of us very patiently, for her to calm down and elaborate. She quickly sobers however when Emmett started to wine. Her emotions suddenly shifted from amusement to trepidation. Shifting Alice from her arms she sat next to her and Esme on the sofa as she began to explain. "I see colors in your eyes now besides the amber gold that they were always. Carlisle for instance has a streak of brilliant white through them and Jasper, you have a swirl of blue. It was startling at first but somehow I knew that it was alright. I knew that I could trust Jasper immediately after looking into his eyes. Kind of the same feeling I have about my power not being a shield. I just, kind of knew. And Carlisle, I knew that you were pure of soul and heart."

Emmett was the first to speak. "So we all have colors in our eyes? Awesome! What color are mine?!?" He was bouncing and opening his eyes as wide as he could. It would have been a highly amusing sight if it hadn't been for Bella's anxiety and hesitation growing.

"Uh...yeah, Em, _most_ of you do have at least a splash of color." She flashed me a look that screamed _help me out here!_ but before I could say anything Carlisle spoke. Thank god, I had no clue what was going on much less what to say.

"You say you felt like you could trust Jasper and that I had a pure heart when you first looked at us, did you feel that with everyone?"

"Well, yeah I guess. I knew Esme was a born mother, full of love, and that Alice was a true friend. Emmett never hid who he was or what he was thinking and was the big brother I always wanted. Rose, well, Rose I felt that she could be cold and self-serving but that once you broke through her walls and she cared for you, she was loyal to the end." She looked nervously to Rose as she described what she had felt. Rose just smirked.

"Don't worry Bella, I'm not angry. It is completely true." Bella just gave a small smile, still a little nervous about it. I couldn't really blame her, Rose was hard to befriend and her and Bella never did get along very well.

"Your right Bella. That doesn't fit you being a shield at all." Carlisle mused, almost to himself. Then Esme spoke up for the first time.

"Bella, sweetie, was there more to your story? We never let you finish."

Bella just shrugged. "Not much. After Edward threw me, he bit me and then ran away. It was at least a few hours gone when he came back and carried me inside before leaving again. Next I know Jasper came in." She looked over at me and smiled. I couldn't help but return it.

Everyone remained quiet for a moment, each with their own thoughts about the day and Edward. Carlisle broke the silence, "Bella, I assume you would rather not see Edward right now if it can be helped?"

She nodded while quickly glancing to me and then back to Carlisle. "I had thought that maybe I would go into Canada. There is a lot of unpopulated area there I should be ok out there alone..."

"Alone? Bella, you won't be alone!" Esme sounded rather upset. I know why Bella was feeling insecure, thanks Edward, fucker, but really we need her just as much as she needs us. Hell, if the family disagrees she and I can go off on our own. All I knew was that I would NOT leave her to be alone.

"Esme is right Bella. We won't leave you to fend for yourself. Even if we knew nothing about you we wouldn't do that. The fact that you are family just makes that idea even more absurd." Thank you, Carlisle.

Bella at least had the decency to look somewhat ashamed at her thoughts, even if they were understandable. "I just didn't want to assume is all. I was hoping you would want me."

"Of course we want you Bella, you are like a daughter to me. I have thought of you as one since Edward brought you home. Don't ever think otherwise. A mother's love for her daughter never goes away."

Bella just sighed and I could feel the guilt and shame roll off of her. She looked at the ground and quietly asked, "What about the love for a son? As much as I would love to be a part of this family I don't think that I can right now. I don't want to come between you all."

It was Rose who spoke up this time. "Bella? Carlisle and Esme might still love Edward as their son but trust me when I say that he will not be allowed back into this family for some time. What he did....what he did to you was unthinkable. Oh and if for some reason he is allowed back? You can count me out. You and I can run off together."

Emmett let out a wolf whistle at that, breaking the tension that had quickly grown through my waves of calm and friendship. "Bella, in all seriousness, I would leave with you and Rose. And not just because I can't let Rose out of my sight."

Alice was next to speak up. "Visions of the future or not, I wouldn't be able to see you go either Bella. Who would I torture with dress up?" She was giggling but her emotions were strong, she would leave the family as well before she forgave Edward.

"Bella, Carlisle and I will always love Edward, and I hope that one day he might show that he is worthy of being forgiven, but he will need to prove that to us first." She paused and looked over to Carlisle, who nodded at her, agreeing with what she was saying. "We love you Bella and will do what ever is in our power to help you transition into this life with ease."

Bella was still looking at the ground. Her guilt had lessened but it was still there so I got up and walked over to her. Leaning down in front of her I tilt her chin up to look at me. "Everyone was telling you the truth Bella. They would all rather be with you then part of a family that allowed Edward to be forgiven so easily. And you already know where I stand on this subject. So no more second guessing us, ok? We love ya Bells and you aren't getting rid of us that easy."

I was rewarded with a smile as she nodded, venom glistening in her eyes. "Thank you, I love you all, so much. I really appreciate everything you have done. I don't know how I could ever repay you."

"No need for thanks and repayments Bella. We just want to see you happy." Esme's smile widened as Bella pushed me out of the way and to hug her.

"Well, now that we have that sorted out there are just a few more things to figure out before this meeting is done. Bella, you can't really continue to use your current last name, especially if we are going to be using the run away story for now. How would you like to be Isabella Cullen?"

Bella's eyes snapped from Esme's shoulder to Carlisle's eyes. "Really?"

Carlisle just chuckled. "Yes, of course Bella. I would be honored if you took the name of Cullen." Her smile grew and her eyes shone as she was nodding her head. "Then we will call in to get the paper work first thing and make it official.

Now, we just have one more thing. Bella, Edward is going to be here..." he glanced at his watch, "about this time tomorrow. Might I suggest that you and Jasper head up to Alaska? First, we were already planning on staying there for a bit so the house is cleaned up and ready for living in. Second, I have a friend that lives nearby, Eleazar, who's power is the ability to sense a vampire's abilities. I would like you to meet him to see if he can get a read on what your power is. I will admit that it intrigues me."

I look over to Bella who was turning to look at me. "Works for me Carlisle if Bella is ok with it." She just smiles and nods from Esme's arms.

"Alright then. Everything is finally settled. I suggest maybe taking the next few hours easy and leaving around daybreak. It would be easier to wait until dark but that would be cutting it to close to Edward's arrival for my liking." We both agreed and decided that we would leave shortly after sunrise so that Bella would have a chance to call Charlie with some privacy. The meeting over, the family was finally able to relax after the hell that had been our day. Everyone stayed in the living room talking and enjoying each others company.

I didn't need my power to feel the love in the room, it was swirling around us all, blanketing us in it's warmth. Looking around at my family I saw nothing but smiling faces and glistening eyes as they took turns giving Bella a hug and chatting with her. She had finally relaxed and opened up to them, having shared her story. I hung back a little, letting them have their moments, even though I really wanted to be there next to her laughing and joking. It was strange, I had Bella to myself for pretty much the entire day and, while it wasn't all fun, I had enjoyed myself immensely. If I was honest I was really looking forward to going to Alaska with her just because we would have a whole lot of time to spend together. As I was trying to figure out just how that revelation made me feel Alice came up beside me. We watched Emmett challenge Bella to an arm wrestling competition and then laughed as Bella beat him again and again.

"She is going to be good for the family I think." Alice suddenly said quietly.

I could feel the small smile on my face. "I agree. She draws people in and you can't help but want to be around her."

Alice was quiet as we continued to watch Bella and Emmett antics. After a bit though I could feel her gaze had shifted to me. Looking over at her I was surprised it didn't hurt quite as much to look into her eyes as it had, even just yesterday. She stayed quiet, just looking into my eyes, searching for only she knows what. Finally she must have found what she was looking for because a small smile crept on her face and she just quietly said, "No. I amend my statement. She will be good for you. The family will just be an added bonus." With that she skipped off to save Bella from a full on wrestling match leaving me with my jaw hanging open, still trying to work through what Alice had meant.


	6. Chapter 6 Road Trip!

**Chapter 6 – Road Trip**

**BPOV**

Turning as I follow Alice up the stairs I take a look at my new, official, family and I couldn't help the smile that grew. They not only wanted me to stay around they actually wanted me as a member of the family. Isabella Cullen. I once thought that I would have that name but under much different circumstances. I was surprised to find that I actually liked these circumstances better. I couldn't say why but feeling the love in the room, I wasn't about to question it.

Carlisle was on the phone, either with the document guy or my father, while Esme supervised Rose cleaning up the broken window. Esme did not appreciate her custom picture window being broken and since Rose had been the one to break it, she was the one to clean it up. Rose had already tried to bribe Emmett to do it for her but was caught, hence Esme's need to supervise. Emmett had made himself scarce, I presume because Esme threatened him if he were to help Rose. Jasper was still just kind of standing there with a far off, rather confused, look.

"Bella? Hurry up! We don't have much time to get you all packed!" Laughing at the pout Alice was throwing at me I run up the last half of the stairway and to my room, beating her there. "Hey! No fair. You shouldn't use your new born speed to cheat!"

We were both laughing by the time she ran into the room, with a bunch of brand new, designer, luggage. I rolled my eyes at her as I started walking to the dresser. "Alice, a simple duffel bag would have been fine you know. I don't need all that, I don't even think I have enough clothes to fill one!"

"Bella, have you looked in your closet yet?" She actually looked hurt. Truth was, even though I had been hiding in here for days, I hadn't even thought to look in the closet. I figured it would be storage or something since this was a guest room. Leaving the dresser I walk over and open the closet door.

It was filled, almost overflowing, with clothes. Walking down the aisle I take a quick inventory. Every piece was my size and, surprisingly, most of them were my style. There were a few dresses and skirts as well as a few pairs of heels but there were more jeans, flats, and tennis shoes. I should have known that Alice would have picked me up more then what I found in the dresser. I really was off in my own little world to not have realized that. Turning back and looking at the door, Alice was just standing there, looking nervous. Running up to her I gather the pixie in my arms and give her a hug to rival one of Emmett's. "Thank you so much Alice!" And I meant every word. It must have been hard for her to buy my style and not the most fashionable pieces.

I could feel her smile against my chest. "I tried to get you what you would be comfortable in. Esme said that I shouldn't try and dress you up to much right now, since you are still young, and I am still learning how to handle not being able to see what you will let me get away with dressing you in. But some of it I just couldn't help but buy!"

Laughing I think about just how lucky I am. They really do care for me. "No problem Alice. I am glad to have so much to chose from. I suppose it would be futile for me to complain about how much this probably cost you wouldn't it?"

It was her turn to start laughing. Thought so. "Don't worry about it Bella. We have more then enough." Shaking my head I just start packing my new clothes.

We were taking our time packing, just enjoying laughing and joking together, when we were interrupted by Esme. "Alice, would you please give Bella and I a moment alone?"

"Sure thing Esme." Alice turned and gave me a wink as she skipped out the door.

"Is everything alright Esme? I'm not being to much trouble am I?"

"No, no dear. You could never be to much trouble if you tried. I just wanted to make sure you were ok. You have been through a lot and I could tell you left quite a bit out of your story earlier." She gave me a pointed look while she sat on the edge of the large bed. I knew she just wanted to be there for me but I just was not up for going into detail.

Slowly making my way to sit next to her I try and figure out just what I want to say. I didn't want to lie but I was still just so torn over the events of the last two weeks. If someone would have told me before my birthday that all this would have gone down I would have laughed in their face.

"Thank you Esme but really I am fine. Or, at least, I will be." I tried to give her a genuine smile.

She nodded but seemed hesitant. "You and Jasper have become close the last day haven't you?" I must have smiled because she relaxed. "That's good. I am glad. He seems like he needs a true friend just as much as you do. He is such a gentle soul but he has been through so much that I think he gets lost sometimes. The breakup with Alice really pushed him over the edge. I haven't really ever seen him as relaxed as I have since we came back here though."

"He makes it so easy for me to be myself around him. I don't have to worry about not being good enough or saying something to make him leave. I wasn't lying when I said that the moment I looked into his eyes I knew I could trust him." My smile slipped and I whispered, almost hoping she wouldn't hear, "He knows the full story."

Esme just nodded. "I had figured that you had told him with how he acted when you were telling us." She paused, looking in my eyes, before a small smile crept on her face. I must have looked confused because she just shook her head. "Lady Fate is a flighty thing Bella. You never know what she has in store for you. Don't fight her on it, even if she surprises you." With a light hug she gets up and smiles at me. I just stare back, unsure of what she was talking about but trying desperately to figure it out.

It wasn't until I hear Jasper trying to talk to me that I realize I had just been sitting on the bed staring at the space Esme had long since vacated. Then he poked me, hard, right in the forehead.

"What the hell Jasper!" I yell as I was jumping up from the bed, rubbing the spot he poked finding that he had left a dent. I knew I was spaced out but there was no need to go denting my forehead! "Stop laughing at me you ass! You DENTED my forehead!" He laughed harder.

"Sorry Bella. I didn't mean to....leave a dent." By now he would have been crying if he could have from laughing so hard. Glaring at him I decide to do the mature thing. Walking over to him, I kick him in the shin. "Hey! That was a bit of an overreaction don't ya think?" He was leaning over rubbing his leg. At least he had stopped laughing. Ignoring him I walk back into the closet and continue to pack.

After a few minutes I hear Jasper walk in and move to stand next to me. Reaching up he rubbed the spot where the dent had been. Fighting the urge to close my eyes and lean into his touch I instead just watched his face soften as he quietly apologized. "I really am sorry Bella, I didn't think I got you that hard. It isn't dented anymore." Seeing the hurt look in his eyes I just couldn't stay angry.

"I know. Just don't go denting my forehead again, you hear?" I punctuated my statement with a light poke of my own to his chest. He nodded and dropped his hand. I instantly missed the contact. Before I could really think much more about it though Alice skipped back in.

"Oh, um, hi Jas. I was just, um, going to help Bella finish packing. I'm not interrupting anything am I?"

"No Alice, I was just leaving." His back had stiffened the moment he heard Alice's voice and had a pained look on his face as he turned to leave. As he got to the door however he stopped and turned back around. "Bella? If it is good for you I thought we could leave in an hour or two. I, um, thought maybe you would like to call your Dad first?" I could feel the large smile erupt on my face as I thought about talking to Charlie. Jasper just nodded his head and I saw his lips lift slightly in his own smile. "I will leave my phone for you then on the nightstand. I have an errand to run but I shouldn't be long. Just come find me when you are done and ready to go." With that he turned and quickly left.

Alice had already started packing all the clothes she bought me. I swear I have enough here for three lifetimes. I didn't even know why I had to take it all now, but she insisted. We would fill a suitcase then take it and sit it on the floor by the door and come back for another. When she didn't come back from one of these trips and had stopped talking I poked my head out of the closet to see where she went. She was just standing in the middle of my bedroom staring at Jasper's phone on my nightstand.

"Alice?"

"Hmm?" Her eyebrows were furrowed and she looked deep in thought, still just staring at the cell phone.

"Alice, everything alright?" Her eyes snap to mine. "It is just a phone Alice."

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, smart-ass, I know that. But it is _Jasper's_ phone."

"Uh, yes. It is. He said he would leave it so I could call my dad. Speaking of that I should do that soon, he will be getting ready for work right about now."

"But it is _Jasper's _phone." I think I might be missing something here, she is looking at me like I was an idiot.

"Yes Alice, we have established that it is, in fact, Jasper's phone. He told me he was leaving it here. You were there when he said it. Why is this such a big deal?"

"Bella, Jasper never leaves his phone behind. He doesn't even like leaving the room when it is plugged in. Whenever anyone made jokes about it he would just say that it is the solder in him to always want to have it close, just in case something happened. Said it was some need to always be prepared." Her eyes were large and showed a confusion that I was not used to seeing from her. Suddenly she broke out into a huge smile and she started bouncing about the bed. "Bella, he left the house to run an errand, he left his phone with you. Do you see what that means?" Without waiting for my answer she continued, "It means he thinks that your safety is more important then his own."

I just roll my eyes as I cross my arms in front of me. "What on earth are you talking about Alice? He just wanted me to be able to call my father."

Maybe I ought to see if I can let her visions come back like I can let Jasper in and out of my emotions. If not having them is going to cause her to come up with crap like this, it might be better to just let her see me.

She suddenly gasped, stopped bouncing, and got this far away look in her eyes. Ah, she was having a vision, that was amusing timing. Waiting until she came out of it I walked over and picked up Jasper's phone playing around with it a little. Alice had to be reading into why he left it here. It just didn't make any sense to me otherwise. Why wouldn't I be safe here? Although he was in a hurry and seemed a little nervous when he left. Great, now she has me reading into it.

"BELLA!" Dropping the phone in my surprise I whipped around to see that Alice had resumed her bouncing, not showing any reason for the outburst.

"What the hell Alice?" She stopped bouncing and looked over at me, with a huge grin plastered on her face.

"I had a vision again and while I still couldn't see you or Jasper I could see the rest of us. I know at least one or the both of you were there though because the corner was dark. But I could see everyone else!"

"Really? Are you sure this was different from before?" Did I really just...will her visions back?

She huffed and rolled her eyes at me. At least she had also stopped jumping on the bed. "Yes. Before I couldn't see anyone who was near you. It was just blackness or at best a very foggy picture. This was crystal clear, aside from the corner which was pitch black. The whole family was there, except Edward, and we were at the house in Canada. Jasper's friends, Peter and Charlotte. were there as well as three other vampires that I have never met before. We were all laughing and looked really happy. Oh, I hope nothing happens and it comes true. The one new vampire was really hot!" she finished with a giggle.

"Alice!"

"What? I'm not attached anymore, and even if I was, it's not like I can't appreciate the guy's looks."

"But you just got divorced! From a several decade long marriage I might add. Doesn't that bother you at all?" I couldn't help but think of Jasper's broken expression as he told me what happened between him and Alice that night on the roof. Alice might be one of my best friends and sister, but I still wouldn't let her just toss Jasper aside like that without saying anything. She broke his heart by divorcing him. And her timing for it couldn't be worse. She basically kicked him while he was down. The more I thought about it the angrier I got.

"Not really, Bella. Don't get me wrong, I love Jasper, always will. I just am not _in love_ with him I guess. I haven't really felt that way in quite a while if I am honest. It was a long time coming really. I tried to fight the outcome, I really did. After your party however the future just got worse and worse if I had continued to wait. I broke it off with him at the last moment I could and have us still end up as friends. Eventually." She was whispering by this point and finally just sat on the bed. Climbing up and sitting across from her I wait patiently for her to continue, not really knowing why I was so angry with her. It wasn't my place to be protective of Jasper but I still felt the need to defend him to her. Let her know just how hurt he was that she drug him along for so long thinking that nothing was wrong. Finally she spoke again, her voice a little stronger although it held a far away tone.

"I know how difficult it is for him to be around me still. I could see the pain in his eyes when I finally told him. I hated that I was going to hurt him so much, that is why I waited as long as I could, right or wrong. I just didn't want to hurt him. Jasper was there for me at a time I had nothing. He was the first thing I saw when I woke up in this form with no memories, no family, nothing. My visions of him kept me going and gave me hope. I really did think we were forever.

When my visions started showing me with someone else, wandering on my own, or once even him with someone else, I sat back and really thought about how I felt for him. Edward was the only one who knew for sure what was going on and I only talked to him about it because I couldn't hide it from him, the nosy bastard. Once I had decided though that I was no longer in love with him I was just trying to find the best time to tell him. Honestly, even if your party hadn't been such a disaster, I would have broke it off soon. It was getting harder and harder to hide my true feelings from him and really, everyone else could tell there was something going on by then." She paused looking like she wanted to say something but wasn't quite sure how. "You, you've talked to him about this?"

I just nodded my head, not really sure where she was going with this. I didn't want to tell her just what Jasper said, he told me it in confidence. I wouldn't betray his trust like that, not after what he has been through, but I was still fighting the urge to defend him, protect him.

"I really hurt him, didn't I Bella." She was barely whispering. I had almost missed her speaking, but I still caught that it wasn't really a question.

Pausing to think about how to answer I think about what she told me. Although I was still angry with her for breaking Jasper's heart, looking at it from her point of view, I could see that she was just trying to do what she thought was best for them both and that she had tried to make it work in her own way.

With a sigh I finally answer her, deciding on the truth as the best way to approach it. "Yes you did Alice. You broke his heart at a time when he really needed you." I saw the pain flash in her eyes as they glistened in the moon light. "But you know what Alice, I think that he will be ok in the end. He just needs some time. Don't push him."

She nodded her head. "I've been trying to give him space. I know that because I came to terms with it a while ago I would just need to be patient. I am just not a patient person I guess."

"Let him come to you Alice. He will let you know when he is ready to let go and just be your friend."

"Thank you Bella. For listening to be and for being there for him. He has never really had a good friend like you. I think you two will be very good for each other."

Sensing that the conversation was coming to an end, I open my arms just as Alice launches herself into them. Hugging her to me tight I try and let go of my anger towards her. It only kind of worked.

Breaking our embrace Alice dives back into packing my clothes as I find Jasper's phone that had slid under the bed. Dialing Charlie's number I take a deep breath as I listen to the rings before he finally picks up.

A half hour later I found myself fully packed, thanks to Alice, and feeling much better, thanks to Charlie. Picking up the last of my bags I took one last look around the room I had begun to think of as my own. I didn't think that we would be back this way for a long while. Maybe I would be able to sneak back in a few years to visit Charlie, but this house was going to be, for all intensive purposes, abandoned.

With a contented sigh I walk out of the room only to run right into Jasper. With a squeak of surprise I jump back and stumble, falling back towards the ground. Feeling Jasper's arms catch me I relax and start laughing. Leave it to me to be the only clumsy vampire.

As if he could read my thoughts I hear Jasper's laugh as he says, "Only you Bella." Righting me he lets go once I am steady on my feet. Then taking my hand he leads me down the hall. "I was actually on my way to find you. I have something for you before we go." Before I could respond we were in his study and he was tossing the small black thing to me. "I ran out earlier and picked it up for you. Everyone in the family has one so I just added you to the plan. I have already programed our numbers into it and the numbers I knew for Charlie and Billy Black."

"You bought me a phone, Jas?" I was suddenly happy for my conversation with Alice earlier. Maybe there was something to the whole Jasper's phone thing after all. He was looking at his feet, shuffling them on the carpet. He was looking kind of nervous. It was cute. Jasper wasn't the kind of guy to get nervous.

"I did. I wanted to make sure that you could call Charlie whenever you wanted. I, um, also wanted to make sure that if something were to happen that you could, you know, call someone. You know, just in case."

Instead of answering him right away I walk over to him. He was still refusing to look at me. Wrapping my arms around his chest I send him a wave of gratitude and whisper my thanks. Knowing how he is with his own phone I am able to take this gesture for what it was, his way of protecting me. I felt him relax a little as his arms finally reach around me, hugging me back, whispering "no problem, it was nothing."

"You were worried I would be angry you spent money on me?" It was a valid worry, I was a little upset that he spent what looked like a few hundred dollars on me. At the same time I could also recognize that this was something important to him, probably more important then even Alice let on, or knew about.

He chuckled, his chest rumbling under my cheek. "A little, yes. I remember your anger and guilt whenever Edward would even just think about spending money on you." He paused, whispering his next sentence. "I didn't want to upset you but I couldn't not get you one."

"Thank you again Jasper. And also for leaving your phone earlier so I could call Charlie. Alice was surprised when she saw it. She said you never went anywhere with out it. I really appreciate that you left it just so I could use it for a silly phone call."

"Calling your father is never a silly call Bella. The fact that you can is a big deal." I felt his chest expand as he took a deep breath. "Bella, I'm not quite ready to get into why but it is important to me that you keep this near you. Please, I would feel a lot better if you did. The thought of something happening to you and you being without a way to contact me or anyone else in the family scares me."

"No need to explain Jasper. If my doing something is important to you then it is important to me. No explanations necessary. Just know I will always be here for you if you ever want to talk about it, ok?"

"Thank you Bella. You really are something special. Now, are you finally packed and ready to hit the road?" Rolling my eyes I nod my head and start for the hall as Jasper grabs the bag full of phone accessories.

Ten minutes later we were in a giant black pickup and pulling out of the garage to start the long trip to Alaska.

~*~

Canada doesn't look much different then Washington I decided. It was just a lot of trees and a smattering of small towns, at least that was all I was seeing on this trip through. Jasper explained that we were going to be taking a longer way up to the house in Denali to avoid as much human contact as possible, especially after what happened right after we started off on this adventure.

We had been on the road for a only a few minutes, a half hour at best, when I had caught the scent of a human. She smelled just like freshly baked apple pie and I tried to get out of the car to get to her. Thankfully Rose had messed with the locks before we left and Jasper had locked me in the car. In my state the locked door confused me long enough that I was able to get my thoughts together, not rip the car door off, and hold my breath until we got out of town and could air out the car. After that Jasper warned me before getting close to town so I just held my breath from the start. I couldn't wait to get to Denali just so that I wouldn't have to worry anymore.

To say the stress was getting to me would be understating it. Between the stress of traveling, fighting my blood lust, and my lingering anger at Alice I was just waiting to blow up. Jasper had finally stopped trying to have a conversation with me about two hours ago when I snapped at him for what must have been the hundredth time since starting this drive. We have sat in silence ever since. I felt bad, I really didn't mean to be sharp and snap at him but I just couldn't help it. My emotions were all over the place and it was enough to give me a headache, which I didn't even think was possible for a vampire to get. I didn't want to think about how this was affecting Jasper. Of course those thoughts though just made the guilt spike which would piss me off more making the stress worse. It was a viscous cycle.

Suddenly the car swerved into a rough dirt road. Grabbing onto the door's arm rest I look over to see Jasper with a serious, determined, expression. After a few miles on the dirt road he stops the car, looking over at me before hitting the door locks and getting out of the car.

"Alright Bella. I am tired of this bull shit. Lets go." He took off into the woods, basically leaving me alone in the car. What the hell? He can't just leave me! What if someone is near by? All but ripping the door off the car I jump out and run off following his scent.

About two more miles into the woods I finally caught up to him. He was leaning up against a tree, knee bent, foot resting on the trunk, arms crossed. He was staring at the ground. "Just a little further in is a bear. Take your time, play with it a little before you eat." Before I had a chance to respond he pushed himself off the tree and jumped up into the branches.

"Don't I get a say in this Jasper?" I yelled up into the forest ceiling.

"No." Was his quiet response. "Now get going. If you hurry you will wake him up and he will be that much more fun."

Shaking my head I figure it would get me no where to argue. I do not want to play with the bear though. That just seems, wrong, cruel even. Quietly I stalk my way through the forest, opening my senses to find the bear. He was about 300 yards to my right. Altering my course I find a small den dug in under a large fallen tree. Pausing at the den's opening I can feel the bear's breath slowly pushing it's way past me as I hear the growl like snores. Taking a deep breath of my own I continue into the den to poke the bear.

Thinking I could just snap it's neck before he wakes up I make my way to the sleeping giant when a rock comes flying past my head and hits him square between the eyes. Turning on my heels I see Jasper standing at the den's opening tossing another stone up in the air and catching it. I see his smirk as he drops the stone, turns, and runs a few paces away.

The stench of rotten meat filled the small hole as I felt the huff of hot air blow past. Before I could turn and face the bear however he let loose a roar as he took a swipe at my back. Flying through the air I twist and land on my feet, sliding a few feet before coming to a stop a little ways outside the den. Crouching down I start to circle the angry monster as he mirrors my movements. Rearing back on his hind legs he bellows his anger, trying to intimidate me.

Taking a step closer I quickly move around to the left swiping with my hand as I go to take out his feet. He falls to his back but manages to right himself before I could pounce onto his stomach. He takes another swipe, catching my shoulder. He doesn't even scratch my skin, although he does manage to destroy the sleeve of my shirt. Now I was angry. I actually really liked this shirt! Spinning around I dodge another hit from the bear, catching his paw and bringing him with me. Letting go half way through the spin I throw the bear into the forest. Running I kick my right foot out just as I get to him catching him in the ribs just as he was standing up. We roll along the forest floor, crashing into bushes and taking out trees. We come to a stop, the bear on top of me. Smiling I arch my back and kick my legs up, reversing our positions. I quickly break the bear's neck and bite down on his throat, tearing the fur away, and drink.

I have had bear before but this one, oh, this one was fantastic. I wasn't sure if it was a different breed or if it was the fight but this was the best meal I have ever had. Knowing that the bear was already dead from the snapped neck I take my time draining him, savoring the taste of his blood flowing down my throat. Even taking my time he was still dry much to soon. Standing and looking around I see Jasper jump down from the tree tops with a smirk on his face.

"Feel better Sweetheart?" I just roll my eyes but I couldn't help but admit that I did, in fact, feel better. My emotions had leveled off and I wasn't near as angry as I had been.

He was just standing there smirking at me. He knew just how much better I was feeling. "Yes but you didn't have to provoke him like that."

He laughed. "Yes I did. You weren't going to fight him, you were just going to drink from him. Don't you shake your head at me, you know I am right. Anyway, you just draining him would have defeated the purpose of finding a cranky bear to begin with. You needed to get your aggression out and fighting a cranky ass bear was the easiest way."

I huffed. "I think you just like watching me hunt."

"Getting to watch you hunt was just an added bonus." he winked at me as I rolled my eyes. "Seriously Bella, I do enjoy watching you hunt. You have some pretty good hunting and fighting instincts. For the most part you are a very graceful, stealthy, hunter as well as clean. Like a cat, a Puma to be exact. I look forward to seeing how much better you are once your strength and speed level out. You will probably be the best hunter in the family. And with your fighting instincts I could really teach you something."

"Seriously Jasper? You sure we are talking about the same person here, Bella Swa...Cullen?"

"Yes Bella, I am talking about you. Every vampire has some kind of ability to fight, it comes with the change I guess, but when you were going at it with the bear I saw that you thought past your next move to several moves ahead. Waited for the perfect opening to strike. Do you play chess?"

I had to laugh. He really does have a military mind. I couldn't help but find it cute though. And he was the first person to say I was graceful at anything much less tell me I was good at fighting.

"No Jasper, I have never really played chess. No one I know would teach me how or they didn't know themselves."

"Well I will just have to teach you when we get to Alaska. I have a feeling you would be good at it. I would love a good challenge." His eyes were bright with excitement. I could feel my own excitement begin to grow at the idea of him teaching me to play. "Come on my little Puma, lets go back to the car and get back on the road.

I rolled my eyes at the use of his new name for me but I could tell he knew that I secretly liked it.

**AN: I am going to start leaving these at the end. That way I can talk about the chapter without fear of slipping.**

**First - Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I didn't get a chance this week to respond to many, it has been a week from hell. Know that even though I didn't write back I really do appreciate every comment that is left. The fact that this story is already up to 94 reviews has me blown away.**

**Second - This story is, as of right now, un-betaed so if you catch a mistake or see something I need to work on (like my use of tense) please tell me so I can try and watch it. Sorry for any mistakes that are made, I try and proof read several times but there is always something that is going to slip past I am sure.**

**Third and finally - I promise, they will make it to Alaska and you will find out Bella's power in the next chapter. Alice just demanded some face time in here and to add the drama Alaska will bring to this one chapter was just to much. My goal is to have Chap 7 done and posted by next Wednesday. **

**Thanks again for reading! Let me know what you think!!  
**


	7. Chapter 7 Alaska

**Chapter 7 – Alaska**

**BPOV**

The Alaska house was gorgeous. I had thought that the house in Forks was huge but it was nothing compared to this home. It sat up on the top of a small mountain and was built out of large gray stones. There were two stories and a basement that was the garage. It had a large darkly stained wrap around deck and a huge matching front door. The driveway wound around to the back where we had to drive under the deck to pull into the garage.

Getting out of the car I look around the large, mostly empty, space. They must have expanded the space into the hill at the front because the room seemed to go on forever. There had to be room for at least 25 cars under here. There were a few cars parked, Rose's BMW being the only one without a cover. The space furthest to the right was decked out to be like a shop, complete with a lift and pit, I guess to make repairs under the cars easier. The ceiling was also taller then I expected, probably 12 foot high, Emmett's Jeep will have no problems fitting in here. He would even have room to spare.

"Just leave your bags here. I can come back for them later while you are in the shower." Jasper was standing by a set of open stairs that lead to the main house. They were simple ply-board and 2x4s and looked very out of place in a Cullen house. I can't believe Esme would allow such a stairway in her home.

I must have been showing my confusion on my face because Jasper just started laughing. "Yes, Esme hates these stairs but Rose will not let her change a thing down here, even the crappy stairs. This is Rose's domain." Laughing at the mental image of Rose and Esme in each others face over something as silly as the stairs, I follow Jasper up.

The door at the top let us out into a large open kitchen and dining room. Walking off to the left where the kitchen part of the room was I pass a door to the side deck and the useless refrigerator. Where most people put upper cabinets, here there was nothing but windows overlooking the deck and with an incredible view of the vast snowy forest. Dragging my fingers along the cool dark granite counter held up by white cabinets with frosted glass doors I walk the length of the kitchen. The dark tiled floor and windows continued past an island that held a stove top and into the dining area where a huge 12 person cherry table sat.

Turning back Jasper was just leaning against the only solid wall, which was painted a bright red, with arms crossed and a small smile on his face. "It is a beautiful kitchen, it really is a shame we don't eat. I would have killed for a kitchen like this before."

A slight chuckle escapes his lips before he responds. "Honestly? I think that is why Esme makes sure to have such nice kitchens. She misses cooking and having family dinners. Now come on, let me show you the rest of the house." He pushes himself off the wall and takes my hand, leading me around the to see the rest of the house which, naturally, turned out to be just as beautiful as the kitchen was.

Jasper said this was their escape house. It was always kept up, restocked with the latest technology, and basically kept in a move in ready state. Since it was no where near a town they could stay here for as long as they liked without having to worry about not aging. And with friends so close by they visited it often.

"Alright Miss Bella, here are the guest rooms. There are two over here on this side and one on the other. This side is where Edward's room is. The other side has Carlisle and Esme's room as well as Alice's. I will just pick one from the two that are left once you pick yours."

As he opened the door to the first one I heard his gasp. It was painted a dark gray with red accents. The old wooden framed bed matched the dressers and bookcases, already filled with history books. There was a small balcony that overlooked the front yard. I could still smell the paint fumes, Esme must have planned this to be Jasper's room, in hopes he was eventually coming back to the family. He was still standing in the doorway in shock when I looked back at him. I just shook my head and went to check out the bathroom. There was no way I could take this room from him, it was perfect.

The bathroom connected it to the second guest room but was not ignored because of it. There was a huge white garden tub, complete with jets, along the wall and a large built in rain shower in the corner. The marble floors were black, matching the marble counter and double sink. The walls were covered in a light blue marble that brightened the space and gave it some personality.

Continuing on into the second guest room I was blown away by it's beauty. If I hadn't known better I would have thought it was designed just for me. The walls were a textured blue. The furniture and large four poster bed were all white. There was a beautiful jewelery box on the dresser that was made from a dark wood but that was the only decorations sitting about. The entire room looked clean but comfortable. There was a matching balcony to Jasper's room.

Speaking of Jasper I hear him finally moving through the bathroom and into the bedroom. He takes a quick look around and laughs. "Do I even need to ask if you want to see the last guest room? This room is perfect for you."

"Yeah, hope you don't mind sharing a bathroom with me. That other room was clearly designed for you."

He just nodded his head and walked back to what was now officially his room. I knew he felt the family didn't really trust him when he went to leave but to see that Esme, at least, expected him to come back and stay hopefully helps. Carlisle's lack of trust really hurt him. He might not have come out and said it but he also didn't support Jasper either. Carlisle just didn't think Jasper could make it on his own. Thinking back on it no one ever really trusted him and that really wasn't fair. Jasper is so much stronger then they all give him credit for.

Letting Jasper know that I was taking a shower I close the bathroom doors and turn on the water, letting it warm up. Temperature might not affect me anymore but that doesn't mean a long hot shower wouldn't feel relaxing. Ducking under the stream of water I just let it cascade down my body, lifting the tension that was left from the long drive.

Once I was finished and dried off I walk back out to my bedroom to see that Jasper kept his word. All my luggage was sitting on the floor by the bed just waiting to be put away. Deciding that I didn't feel like doing that just yet however I pull out some underwear and a pair of comfortable jeans. Digging for a white tank top and the light green cashmere sweater I remember packing, I get dressed and make my way out of the bedroom to find where Jasper went, throwing my hair up in a messy bun on my way.

He turned out to be sitting in the library, in front of a nice fire. He was just sitting there, eyes closed, lost in thought. Pausing at the door I wasn't quite sure if he would want me around. He had said this room was special to him while giving me the tour. Not wanting to be alone at the moment however, won out over being polite. So walking in the room I look around at all the books, eventually coming to find a copy of Romeo & Juliet. Taking the book from the shelf I make my way to the empty chair next to Jasper, who still hasn't moved, and snuggle down in the leather to try and lose myself in the story.

I realize after about ten minutes though, that unfortunately, the story is failing to capture my thoughts. My mind keeps returning to the quiet, unmoving, vampire seated next to me. Turning in the chair I pull my knees up and tuck my feet next to me so that I can look at him while pretending to read. He almost looked like he could be sleeping, he looked so peaceful and relaxed.

I could feel the smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. I felt safe with him, like I didn't have to pretend to be someone I wasn't. I had to wonder if he felt the same with me. I hope he does. He has come to mean quite a bit to me and I would like it if I was able to offer him the ability to just be himself. Thinking back to my fuzzy human memories he seemed like quite a loaner before, much like me. Quiet and introverted. Most people seemed to take in his quiet attitude and assume he was relaxed and laid back but to me, he actually seemed a lot more relaxed the last few days then I had ever seen him before. Then again I wasn't tempting him with my blood anymore so that might have something to do with it. Something was telling me though that there was more to his new attitude then that.

Before he was always on the outside of the group, slightly separated from the others. Even before Edward and I were together, testing his control by bringing my blood closer to him, he would just sit quietly at lunch and not really join in. Looking at him now though I couldn't figure out why. When he allowed himself to open up he was a great guy. Caring, funny, sweet.

I guess that was it though; _When he allowed himself to open up._ He hasn't really ever opened up to any of the Cullens, not even Alice from what I could tell. I had never seen him smile the way he did when he picked that fight with the bear. His eyes held a sparkle and a hint of mischief that made his face light up. I want to see that look again. I want to be the one to put that smile on his face.

Fully looking up at him now, losing all pretense of reading, I study his face. The moonlight filtered in, a stray beam landing on his face. His longish dirty blond hair was hanging in his eyes, his jaw clenched, showing me that his thoughts were stressed. I could see the scars on his neck but they didn't bother me. They just showed how strong he really was.

With a sudden quick intake of breath I stopped breathing altogether. It couldn't be. I just got out of a very serious relationship, a relationship that ended very, very, poorly. There was no way but there was also no denying it either. I was smiling before I realized it.

I like Jasper Whitlock.

**JPOV**

After poking the fire one last time I finally allow myself to relax back into the soft leather recliner. With a deep breath I close my eyes and lean my head back to enjoy the heat radiating from the flames. I was still wound pretty tight from the drive up here but I always took a while to decompress when things were stressed. And while the second half of the drive was much better it was still stressful.

The house was quiet allowing me a rare opportunity to just sit and think. Something Bella had said to me while on the road had me slightly unnerved. We had been talking, asking each other random questions, just trying to get to know one another. She was talking about her love of reading and what her favorite books were. She had a spark in her eyes and spoke with a passion that I hadn't expected. It made me realize that I didn't have anything like that. Sure there were things I enjoyed, like reading, but I didn't have that one hobby or activity that made me completely happy, that I could fall back on to help lift me up when I was stressed or upset.

I was a soldier. I had seen more action in both this life and my former, human, life, then I cared to remember. I was a planner and tactician. I would walk into a room and immediately survey it, find the best exits, plan for the best escape or fight. I would be constantly scanning the horizons, looking for possible threats. It was all second nature to me. Most times I did it without thinking, never really even realizing that I was doing it. That part of my brain I never allowed to be shut off, never allowed to rest.

But then I became friends with Bella.

Bella. I wasn't quite sure what to think about her. Around her I was able to be myself, the guy behind the soldier. When we were talking on the roof was the first time I could remember that I just acted without a plan, without thinking ahead. I hadn't stopped to access the potential threat in opening up to her; I had just started talking. Bella's simple presence had made me feel safe. Had made me feel like I didn't have to worry about what was going to happen next, that I could just enjoy what was happening then. I was able to really laugh and joke around. Thinking back even when she told me her story, had talked about what Edward had done to her, I felt anger but no need to start planning out how to find him, how to hurt him. I had just accepted what she told me and did my best to comfort her.

Vampires don't change easily and yet Bella had brought about a change in me without me even realizing it. I had thought that after Alice left I needed to go find out who I really was, to recapture my lost self. The last few days with Bella however taught me that I didn't need to find or recapture myself, I just needed to relax. Once I relaxed I found that I already knew exactly who I wanted to be, who I already was. It was the always on soldier that needed to go.

I smiled thinking of my easy banter with Bella. The only other person who had been able to pull me out of my shell and tease me like that was Peter. And he only managed it because of his persistence and the fact that Maria forbade me from killing him for it. Bella though, it was just natural to go back and forth, teasing and carrying on. When I called her Puma I was probably just as surprised as she was. I was never one to come up with silly little nicknames for people. At best I used a shortened version of a given name or a simple term of endearment like darlin' or sweetheart. I just never understood the need. Yet I not only called Bella Puma then but I continued to.

"Jas? Honey, are you alright?"

My eyes fly open as I sit up in the chair and look around the small library. Bella was lounging on the recliner next to me with a book in her lap. She was looking at me, the concern in her eyes mirrored in her emotions. Holy fuck, I must have been out of it to not only miss her coming in but then to miss her sitting here.

"Jasper?"

I give my head a quick shake to clear the errant thoughts running through it. "Yeah, sorry Sweetheart. Just a little lost in thought I guess. How long have you been sitting here?" I look at the fire to see that it had died down to nothing but embers.

"About an hour I guess. I almost didn't come in, I didn't want to bother you but I also didn't really want to be alone. Hope you don't mind?"

"No, not at all. You just managed to startle me is all. And let me tell you, that is no easy feat." I let out a nervous chuckle. Why in the hell was I nervous all of a sudden? This was just Bella for Christ's sake.

She rewarded my efforts with a smile however so either she didn't notice or she was nice enough not to say anything. Knowing my Puma it was the latter. Getting up I check the time, noting that we have a few more hours yet until Eleazar and Carmen, his mate, get here. Tossing a few logs onto the fire I walk around to find a book to read.

The library wasn't large but it had quite a collection of books. Esme had made sure all the floor to ceiling bookshelves were stocked with a mixture of books so that each of us could find something. Bookshelves were lining three of the four walls with the fourth being all glass, looking out to the woods, with the large stone fireplace in the center. The dark brown leather recliners in front of the fireplace were the only seating in the room. Not like we needed a lot of seats in here since no one but me ever really stayed in the room to read. Everyone else chose to find a book and leave but for me, there was just something about the dark cherry wood of the bookcases and the burgundy carpet that called to me. Out of all the different rooms in all our different houses, this one was my favorite.

Walking over to the history section I pick up one of the many civil war books and moved to sit back in my chair. Bella had gone back to her book and, although I thought I saw her sneak a look over at me a few times, her emotions showed me nothing but happiness and contentment.

Nothing more had been said between us but as time wore on Bella began to feel nervous. The closer Eleazar's visit got the more nervous she became. I tried to send her a wave of calm once, only to be treated with the icy death glare, so I just tried to ignore it and let her feel nervous. When I was reaching my breaking point and becoming nervous myself I could finally hear their approach.

"Puma, there is nothing to be nervous about. I promise. Eleazar and Carmen are great people, very much like Carlisle and Esme." She took a deep breath and nodded her head but I could still feel the nervousness and fear. "They are just about here, why don't we go down to the family room so we can greet them."

I put my book aside to get up and offer her my hand. She allowed me to help pull her out of the chair and lead her out into the hallway. I was surprised to find that I was happy when she tightened her grip on my hand instead of dropping it. Looking down at her fingers intertwined with my own I could feel my smile trying to break out. My eyes snap up to Bella's when I hear her softly clear her throat. Before I could really feel embarrassed however she smiles at me and I couldn't hold my own back any longer. I didn't quite know what was going on but I did know that Bella's hand felt warm in my own and I wasn't going to complain about holding it.

We made it to the front door just as we hear the bell. After introductions I lead us back to the living room. We all know there is only one real reason for this particular visit, and if Eleazar was able to tell Bella's power it would be instant, but that doesn't mean I can't be polite. I let Eleazar and Carmen share the loveseat while I sit on the sofa, Bella choosing to sit next to me on the side away from our guests. We share small talk for a little while about nothing in particular. I try to relax a little in their company, testing out my new opinions on myself. I was happy to find that I was more comfortable around them now then I had been before and I even managed to joke a little with Eleazar. Once Bella relaxed a little, she and Carmen got along like they had been life long friends.

When the conversation finally drifted to Bella's change she gave a much abbreviated version of the events stating that her and Edward had gotten into a fight, he lost control, and thankfully managed to stop drinking before she died. Though she left a lot out she still left no doubt that it was not a peaceful event. Our two guests were very quiet for a bit after that, reconciling what Carlisle had told them to what Bella had just said. I knew Carlisle hadn't told them much other then she was a newborn and we didn't understand her powers but it was still probably a shock. Edward was always prided on his control and he not only lost it to his blood lust but also to his anger.

After a few minutes Carmen began looking back and forth between Bella and I with curiosity before I felt her determination spike. However, I was not prepared for the question she asked. "Bella, what will you do when you see Edward again?"

I stopped breathing. The thought of Bella having to see him again had never crossed my mind. I was suddenly worried that she would forgive him. I could hear Bella's sharp intake of breath but I was quickly becoming lost in my own thoughts. He hurt her so horribly, both physically and emotionally. I knew Esme and Carlisle would forgive him, Alice and Emmett maybe after some time, Rose probably never. I knew I would never forgive him. Bella was so special, a one of a kind girl. You treasure those, not break them.

I could feel the anger building in my chest. I tried to keep the growl quiet but I know Bella sitting next to me heard it. Her eyes quickly found mine. She just looked into them for a moment before looking back to Carmen. I felt like I was hanging on a cliff, my life depending on how she answered such a simple question. It shouldn't matter to me, we were just friends, but it did and that thought scared me almost as much as what her answer might be.

"I honestly don't know Carmen. At the moment you would probably have to hide all the matches and lighters." She laughed as I exhaled my held breath. Carmen was watching me, a knowing smile on her face. I wonder if she could see my internal struggle. If she could maybe she could help explain it to me. "In time though we might be able to be civil or even friends depending on his actions from here on out. I would try for the family at least." She turned to look at me, putting her hand on my knee. Moving my own hand on top of hers I look up to see she had a genuine smile on her face. I return her smile with one of my own and give her hand a slight squeeze. She flips her hand and our fingers become intertwined once more.

Carmen's small smile grew as she looked to Eleazar. "So, honey, are you able to help this nice young lady out?"

He cleared his throat and the air immediately became tense. This is what we came up here for. "I think so but it is a bit confusing to me. Maybe if you explained what you could do it would help me understand more what I see."

My brave little Puma nodded her head and began to tell Eleazar everything she thought was part of her power. Her nerves had come back and I could feel a slight trace of fear in her so I kept my grip on her hand tight, moving my thumb in small versions of the circles she first calmed me with on the roof in Washington.

Listening to her explanation of being able to block out Edward and Alice easily, me not so easily, and her bubble thing, it really did sound like she had a shield, that is until she got to the point where she could see colors in our eyes. "Eleazar, you have a gold streak through yours and I feel like you are very happy and lucky in life. Carmen you have a lavender streak. I feel like I could trust you both, that you are like family. Everyone I have met so far after my change, aside from one person, has had colors in their eyes, either swirls or streaks. Some of the colors were the same but the feelings I get from seeing them are each different, even if it is just a marginal difference."

Only one person hasn't had a color? What could that mean. And who was it? I wonder if she will tell me. Before I could ask though she started talking. Damn, she probably knew what I was thinking. I felt her give a quick squeeze of my hand to let me know that she was, in fact, on to me.

"That is just about it. The only other thing, and this might not have anything to do with my power, is that I feel like I know things, like intuition I guess. I can't really tell what is going to happen or anything but, um, ugh. This is so hard to explain." She sat, brows furrowed as she thought of a way to explain it. Eleazar and Carmen just waited patiently for her to figure it out. I thought I might know what she meant though, Peter has something like that, although if she does have something like that I hope to hell she is less of an ass about it. Peter always tries to leave cryptic messages and just smirks at you when he 'knows' something. "An example is best I guess. When we found out the details of Edward's call to Carlisle I felt like I needed to leave. I don't know why but I just knew that I could not be at that house when Edward got there."

Eleazar was nodding his head. I hope that this all made sense to him because it sure did sound like My Puma had more then one power. Thanks to being able to shield we were going to have enough trouble with the Volturi wanting Bella for their guard. We didn't need her to be the only multi-talented vampire out there.

"Alright Miss Bella, I think that helps me out quite a bit. Let me see now if I can explain it to you. You know that my power is being able to see or rather sense another vampire's ability. What you might not realize is that includes the strength of that ability. When we first met today I was blown away. I could tell you were strong. Much, much, stronger in fact then Edward or even Alice's abilities and just as strong as Jasper's."

What? He has got to be mistaken. "I'm sorry to interrupt Eleazar but are you sure you have that right? Edward and Alice's powers are a lot stronger then mine. And even undeveloped Bella is proving to be much stronger as well." He just answered with a grin. I could feel his certainty at what he thought but I didn't understand it at all. My power wasn't strong, sure it was useful but not strong.

"No Jasper, I got it right. You don't give yourself enough credit. Edward and Alice might have more desirable talents for those who don't think about it but yours is by far more powerful. Anyone who was smart would want you on their side." I was shaking my head. I was not stronger then either of them. "Let me put it this way. The one thing that humans and vampires share above all others is that we are, at our cores, emotional beings. We are ruled by those emotions from our basic needs, such as thirst or hunger and sleep for the still living, to the complex feelings of love and hope. You are able to control emotions so it only stands to reason that therefor you are able to control us."

My jaw dropped. I could what?

"Eleazar, this can't be right. People are always blocking me or throwing off my 'forced' emotions. There is no way I would be able to really control them." There were days I couldn't even calm the family let alone control them. He has got to be wrong.

"How hard are you really trying Jasper? You use your power for good, calming those who are anxious or negating one's fear. You don't actually _want_ to force people to feel something other then what they do naturally so when you encounter resistance to your power you automatically back off. However when the situation calls for it your emotions are never blocked or thrown off. As hard as it might be think back to your past. Was your power ever refused then, when your life depended on it?"

He was right. No one, not even Maria was able to block me when I had set my mind to something. If I really think about it I had never been refused anything other then freedom but it wasn't until my actual escape that I had even wanted that. Fuck me, does this mean I was actually controlling the army?

Eleazar put up his hand to stop the thought that I had been ready to express. Closing my mouth I hold just a little tighter to Bella, still trying not to believe what is being told to me, even if my logical side said it was all true. "I didn't think so. I can see the worry in your eyes, and don't. You might have been controlling the day to day actions of those around you but you were _not_ the leader of that Army. You did nothing but survive and there is nothing wrong with that. As soon as you were given the opportunity to change your life for the better you took it. Some fatherly advice? If an opportunity presents itself that will result in you being happier or your life being better, take it. Deal with the consequences later." He looked from me to Bella and then back.

"I still don't understand how I could actually _control_ someone's actions though. Sure I could make them feel lethargic but I couldn't actually make them lay down."

"Think about it this way. We base our decisions on what we know about something and how we feel about it. If someone is given the choice, say to attack or run away, you could make them feel fear causing the option to run to be the better one or you could make them feel anger, causing them to charge. In a more day to day example, your family has a hunting trip planned. You want to stay home alone but they are badgering you to come. You make them feel wary and irritated when you are in the room, and send them relief when you leave. They make the conclusion that they could use some time away from you leaving you home for the trip."

Holy shit. I must not have moved for a while because Bella was tugging on my shirt sleeve with her free hand. Shaking my head I look over to her, seeing awe as well as concern in her eyes. I nod my head and give her a smile, sending her a wave of reassurance. I was fine I would just need time. I would have never guessed I could do this. I didn't want to be able to control others! Giving my attention back to Eleazar I nod for him to continue. I might be more powerful then I thought but I still didn't see how I beat out a fortune teller and a mind reader.

Eleazar nodded back in understanding and continued on. "Now, back to Alice and Edward and why their powers are not nearly as strong as yours. It is true that they have powers that others covet. They are easy abilities to understand, mind reading and seeing the future. They are nice powers to have around. However, both abilities very flawed and incomplete.

"Lets begin with Alice. She is limited in her visions since they are based solely on the decisions of others. Other people are unpredictable and rarely stick with their first decision, many times not ever actually making a final decision until the very last moment. This makes her visions untrustworthy. I imagine she has a lot more visions that she tells you about. She has just perfected the art of choosing the most likely future from the many she sees.

"As for Edward, he might be able to read minds but that doesn't mean he understands the person thinking those thoughts. There is a reason that we keep 99% or more of our thoughts to ourselves. It is because most of those thoughts would not be understood by anyone but ourselves. Edward however hears those things and then judges for them. Say he see's someone imagine killing another person. It is possible that the person was just stressed and indulging in a fantasy or maybe they were a writer thinking up a new story. Edward has no way of knowing this. This makes his actual knowledge of the human and vampire races limited by his own open mindedness, and, well, we all know how open he really is."

Well fuck. He is right about the both of them. It was true that Edward was quick to judge others due to their thoughts and he would let those judgments cloud his actions towards them. And Alice, I had always thought she was keeping visions from me, from the family. Eleazar's explanation made complete sense, she would pick the most likely outcome to a situation and we would fall in line behind her. But Eleazar wasn't quite finished yet. I was almost scared to find out what my Bella could do now.

"I am not saying that these things make either of them bad people. They are both loving and caring individuals with an exceptional gift. It is only when compared with your own gifts that theirs are considered weak. I am also not saying your own powers are without flaws. Jasper your power's main flaw is that it is ruled by you. If you weren't such a good person our lives could be very different. A lesser man with your abilities might force a woman to love them, could make those around him follow him blindly, obeying any order. It is also slightly limited by your range. You can only affect those within a specific radius. I say slightly only because after being bombarded by forced loyalty it would only be a matter of time before it was no longer forced and the recipient truly wanted to follow you."

"I...but...that is...good god." I couldn't get my thoughts in a row in my head much less out. I really had never thought about my power like this. It was both incredible and scary as hell. Everyone just let me have a moment to try to come to grips with what Eleazar had just revealed. When he next spoke he was whispering but he left no room to doubt him.

"Jasper. I have have met a lot of vampires in my life and I have never come across someone with a power as strong as yours. Until today."

My eyes shoot to Bella's. She was looking at me, the fear evident in her eyes. She didn't want a strong power anymore then I did. I let go of her hand and put my arm around her shoulder, pulling her into my side.

Eleazar took a deep breath before beginning. "This might be a bit hard to explain but this is how I see it. Bella, like I said earlier, aside from Jasper, I have yet to find a power as strong as yours. It is the power of protection. It is like a shield but, more. It obviously has shield like aspects, such as your bubble, but unlike a simple shield you can do more. This is why it seems that you have multiple abilities when in fact it is just different aspects of one. You are able to block others from entering your mind and can protect yourself with your bubble. I think that the colors you are seeing in all our eyes are actually your way of seeing our true character so that you know who to trust, who is good so to speak. Your knowing things is just your intuition, which your ability has supported and increased. It is possible that more aspects will pop up as you grow and develop it but I think that this is it.

"Basically the short version is that you can protect yourself, and possibly others, from both mental and physical attacks."

Wow. Protection. That is a powerful ability on its own and the fact that Bella was able to block Edward when she was human, well, that would certainly mean that she would be incredibly powerful now. Giving her shoulders a squeeze I lean down to whisper to her, "You doing ok, Puma?"

She was quiet for a bit longer. I just held her tight to my side, trying to be there for her, trying to be whatever she needed me to be. I had no doubt that his would be difficult for her to take. She was never one to want the spotlight or power. After about five minutes she looked up at me. She had cut her emotions off but I could clearly see the war of them in her eyes. She was fighting back the fear, anxiety, and worry. With a deep breath she closed her eyes for a moment and when she opened them I saw the steeled determination in them. She let her emotions free and I felt her excitement and conviction wash over me. The fear was still there but she was doing everything she could to not let it win. That's my brave little Puma.

Shifting her gaze back to Eleazar she finally speaks. "I think I understand Eleazar. Thank you. It will just take a while to get used to I think. This wasn't really what I was expecting to hear. Then again, I don't know what I was expecting but it wasn't this, that is for sure."

Eleazar chuckles, "I don't think either of you were expecting what I have had to say today." Ha! That is an understatement. I wasn't expecting anything having to do with myself, we were here for Bella. He looks back to me before continuing. "Just so you know, this conversation is just between us. There was a reason I never disclosed this information to you before Jasper. What you choose to tell your family is up to you. I wouldn't blame you for keeping it quiet though."

"Thank you Eleazar. That would be greatly appreciated. I don't think I want everyone to know just what my power can do if I can help it." I can't imagine how this will all go over. Eleazar had met a lot of vampires having worked with the Volturi and he said earlier he had never met someone with such a powerful ability until Bella. Go figure, the two most powerful vampires out there, that we know about anyway, and neither of us could give a rat's ass.

Bella's nervousness and fear was creeping back up as she began to speak. Nope, she didn't want this either. "Eleazar? You were talking earlier about the flaws of our power. What is mine? The way you described it my power seemed, well, invincible, for lack of a better word."

Eleazar was smiling. "I am not positive Bella but you are not invincible. My feeling is that you can't be hurt physically by either a power or by hand but emotionally you could be destroyed. Based on what I know of you from both this meeting as well as what Carlisle and Esme have told me you are, and don't take this the wrong way, please, you are a rather emotional person to begin with. If an attacker were to get you flustered and distracted they could sneak in a physical attack or they could go after loved ones to try and force you to do as they wished. Also, from what I can tell of your power you are only fully able to protect yourself and your mat...ahem." His eyes shot to Carmen who gave him a very slight shake of her head. If I hadn't been paying attention I would have missed it. What weren't they telling us? It sounded like he was going to say she could also protect her mate, why wouldn't he want her to know...oh fuck me.

_Bella couldn't block me but could block everyone else with ease._

_I wasn't thrown by her shield like Emmett was, even though I was the bigger threat._

_Our powers are equal in strength and complimentary in nature. _

_Her vulnerability is her emotions, I can control those. _

_My own vulnerability is myself, she can protect me._

Eleazar was still talking but I wasn't listening anymore. I was to busy adding up what I knew added with the fact that I do actually _like_ Bella and it was obvious. I was Bella's mate.

"Jasper! Are you listening to me?" I blinked a few times. Bella was standing in front of me, hands on her hips. I hadn't even noticed that she had gotten up.

"Um, Sorry?" It came out more like a question but I couldn't be worried about that now. I was still fighting to be pulled from my thoughts. Everything made so much more sense now. My need to be around her, my need to protect her, keep her safe, see her smile. The warmth I felt when she held my hand, the fact that she made me feel safe and that I could be myself around her.

Hearing the air move I shift to the right quickly, effectively dodging Bella's hand as she tried to smack the back of my head. "What the hell was that for?" I didn't think I had done anything to deserve that.

"Well I have only tried to tell you three times now that I need to hunt." Shit.

"Oh."

"Yeah, Oh. I was asking if you were coming. You don't have to since Eleazar and Carmen offered to take me but if you are this spaced out maybe you need to as well. You are normally much more with it." She was trying to look annoyed but was having trouble fighting her smile.

I laughed. "Yeah, yeah. I get it, Puma. I spaced and missed the last bit of the conversation. I will come with." The smile she gave into lit up her whole face. I could feel myself relax even more just seeing it. I would make it my life's work to not just put another one of those smiles on her but to keep it there. She reached out and took my hand. I let her pull me up and lead me out onto the back deck to where Eleazar and Carmen stood waiting. They both looked at me with smiles that matched the one that had been on Esme and Alice's faces as we left Forks. As they began running to the woods I was left wondering if Bella knew. Was I the last person to figure it out?

I was also trying to figure out just what in the hell I was going to do now that I did know.

* * *

**AN: **

**First, a huge thanks to Jasper's Darlins for the review on their blog. When I first started this story I never expected it to make it to their site. For some awesome Jasper recommendations visit their blog at:**

**http:// jaspersdarlins (dot) blogspot (dot) com**

**Second, sorry this is chapter is being posted a little late. I know I told everyone I would have it up on Wednesday but thanks to a nasty cold and a rough week at work it took a little longer to get ready. **

**I will try my best to have the next chapter ready for you sometime next week but thanks to the upcoming holidays I don't know how much free time I will have. But I will do my best!**

**Hope you like it, I tried to go for a different angle regarding their powers so please let me know what you think!**


	8. Chapter 8 Snowballs and Phone Calls

_Previously:_

_I laughed. "Yeah, yeah. I get it, Puma. I spaced and missed the last bit of the conversation. I will come with." The smile she gave into lit up her whole face. I could feel myself relax even more just seeing it. I would make it my life's work to not just put another one of those smiles on her but to keep it there. She reached out and took my hand. I let her pull me up and lead me out onto the back deck to where Eleazar and Carmen stood waiting. They both looked at me with smiles that matched the one that had been on Esme and Alice's faces as we left Forks. As they began running to the woods I was left wondering if Bella knew. Was I the last person to figure it out?_

_I was also trying to figure out just what in the hell I was going to do now that I did know._

**Chapter 8 – Snowballs and Phone Calls.**

**JPOV**

We were sitting in the living room again just chatting and talking about nonsense after having come home from hunting. Eleazar and Carmen both wanted to stay until we heard from Carlisle about Edward's visit. They were worried for our family since hearing about Edward's actions toward Bella.

Bella and I had each gone different ways when hunting for once. I wasn't so worried about her hunting alone out here, there would be no humans around for her to run into, so we decided to just take some time to ourselves. I was glad she had suggested it. I really needed some time to process everything that had been discussed. Between my power being nothing like what I thought it was, Bella being just as powerful, and my sudden realization that Eleazar thought she was my mate, I needed to seriously decompress.

Ah, my Bella. I still wasn't sure what to do about her. I was able to come to grips with how Eleazar saw my power rather easily once given the time to think on it. It all made to much sense to not be true. I would be happy never to try it out but I would trust Eleazar. Bella though, she was more difficult to wrap my head around. The more I thought about it the more I could see how my feelings towards her grew. Even if I didn't know that at least Eleazar thought us to be mates I would be falling for her. How could you not really? She was beautiful, her long chestnut cherry hair that had just enough of a curl to be bouncy, her big expressive eyes that, while no longer brown, were still just as gorgeous, and just her body in general was, well, stunning. She was beyond beautiful as a human but I will admit, she takes my breath away now. And that wasn't even considering how she was on the inside. Her personality and sweet, caring, selfless, nature just made her even more desirable. I won't even get started on how her intellect and sense of humor got to me. She was, in short, an amazing woman in every way.

Breaking my gaze from Bella before I had a problem to hide I look back to Eleazar, who was just smiling at me. He winked before getting up to walk over to Carmen and Bella. I roll my eyes and sit back on the sofa, checking my phone again, just in case. I knew that with the four of us sitting here waiting for it to ring we wouldn't miss it but I just couldn't stop checking it.

As if she was reading my thoughts Bella walks over and sits next to me, placing her hand on my knee. "They will call when they can. I'm sure everything is fine." Her voice betrayed her worries however. Looking up into her eyes I could see that they mirrored the anxiety laced in her voice. Wishing she hadn't been hiding her emotions from me I reach out taking her hand, lacing our fingers together and give a light squeeze. She gives me a small smile and settles down in the sofa, resting her temple on my shoulder, keeping our hands together.

Closing my eyes I feel the tension in my body flow out, against my will. Just her touch was enough to calm me down and allow me to relax. With a deep breath I suddenly knew what it was I needed to be doing when it came to Bella.

Absolutely nothing.

Or, rather, nothing different. I would treat her no different then if I hadn't had my revelation and just let things develop between us, if they were meant to, naturally. If I were to try and build my feelings for her based on the assumption that we were mates I could very well end up in another situation like Alice left me in, and I couldn't go through that again. I had assumed that Alice was my mate. I never forced myself to love her, I loved her very much, but that love was built on the knowledge that we were meant to be forever and not on our actual relationship.

I was now feeling like a cliché, if I only knew then what I know now. I couldn't say I would change anything since it did lead me here but I do regret letting Alice take charge of me so much and not standing up for myself to her. She told me we were mates and that I would love her; I went along with it and believed her. While I did love her, we were not mates. I finally found something that Alice got wrong. It made what Eleazar said earlier that much more real. About how she probably saw many endings and just went with what was most probable.

Shaking my head to clear my thoughts, I did not want to delve into that line of thinking right now, I tear myself from Bella's side and walk out to the deck. The tension in the house was growing the longer we went without word from Washington. It was getting harder to relax, even with Bella at my side, the longer we were in there. We needed a distraction, something to break the tension until that damn phone call came through.

Looking out over the cleared back yard I got an idea. Running down the stairs and across the driveway I scoop up a fist full of snow. Making it into a ball I slowly creep back up the stairs until I could see in the windows. Eleazar and Carmen were sitting in the loveseat together reading, Bella was still in her seat on the sofa just looking out into space. Quietly I enter through the side door in the kitchen and make my way to the living room. I could see Bella's profile from the doorway as I launch the snowball at her. She must not have seen me coming since I hit her square in the side of her head. Her expression was so adorable, a mix between fury and humor, and I doubled over in laughter, Eleazar quickly following once he realized what I did.

Bella slowly stood up as Carmen looked to me with a smirk. "You might want to run Jasper."

Shit.

I bolt back to the kitchen and out the side door as Bella runs to the door from the living room. We reach the deck at the same time, facing off. Bella tried to keep the angry sneer on her face but her eyes were dancing with mischief. Neither of us said anything as we crouched in front of each other, waiting to see who would make the first move.

When she made no indication that she would break I, as fast as I could, turned and jumped from the side of the deck, landing in the middle of the drive. Without looking to see if she would follow I took off through the back yard, scooping up another handful of snow as I went.

Risking being caught I turn to find where Bella was. She was a few steps behind me. Twisting my upper body I launch the snowball but she dodges, throwing one of her own right back. She was to fast for me since I had missed that she had even had a snowball made and I only managed to turn around so that she hit my back. She was right behind me by now so I tried to zigzag around the yard. She was still faster then me so I knew that she was either holding back for the fun of the game or she wanted me to get cocky before she struck.

Running into the woods I was hoping that I could lose her in the trees and get the advantage back. We were staying close to the house, running between the forest and the yard. I had finally given her the slip by jumping from tree top to tree top and then sitting quietly for a minute. Bella had finally figured out that she had lost me and was stopped just in front of the tree I was in. She was cocking her head to the side listening for any sound that I might make.

Suddenly the wind shifted and blew my scent right to her. She immediately spun and her eyes shot right to my hiding spot. Quickly jumping down from my perch I tried to run to the house. She knew exactly what I was going to do though and ran around to head me off. We were in the middle of the yard when she caught up to me, taking me down with a tackle to my side. We skidded to a halt with Bella on top of me, straddling my stomach. I tried to wiggle out from under her before I could embarrass myself, I really was enjoying the tackle and this position a little to much, but before I could get free Bella grabbed my wrists and pinned them to my side.

That move was really not helping my problem. If I thought she was beautiful before, god, that was nothing compared to how hot she looked now. What the hell was going on with me? I figure out I was falling for this girl and suddenly I couldn't seem to control my thoughts or my body's reaction to her. I apparently didn't need to worry about that though.

Her soft, full, lips were locked onto mine, her eyes looking into my own, with a mix of anticipation and worry. It took me only a second to recover from my surprise and kiss her back. Her hands slid from my wrists, freeing me, as her eyes slowly closed. I took advantage and rolled us over so that our positions were reversed, me now hovering over her. Her hands went to my neck and into my hair, pulling me closer to her. My eyes closed as our lips moved together slowly, getting a feeling for each other, the world around us fading away as we got lost in the kiss.

I was running my tongue along her bottom lip, silently asking her if I could deepen the kiss, when her tongue darted out to meet mine. After playing and tasting each other she finally allowed me entrance to her mouth. I had never been more grateful for not having to breathe then I was at that moment. Kissing Bella was like nothing I had ever experienced. I never wanted to stop.

Bella suddenly released her emotions to me, whether on purpose or not I didn't know, but I also didn't care. The love, lust, and pure happiness she was feeling at that moment swirled around me. Leaning down onto my left elbow my right hand moves to her hip. I was quickly losing what little control I had on myself and while I didn't want to stop we needed to. I didn't want to take her here in the snow on the back lawn. I wanted to treat her right, I knew she didn't have any experience in this.

Slowly backing off on the kiss I finally break away. Peppering her lips and cheek with a few light pecks I move my head to rest on her shoulder. I had to bite back the words I wanted to say, for fear of scaring her with them. That kiss broke what little threads I had left tying me to my past. I couldn't fight it or deny it any longer. I would do anything for her, I would protect her. She was my world, my reason for living.

I was in love with Bella.

**BPOV**

We stayed laying in the snow for what felt like hours although it was probably only a few minutes. We were both breathing heavy, trying to catch our unneeded breath. Jasper was fully laying on me at this point with his head on my shoulder, eyes closed. He had kept most of his weight off of me until now and I was surprised to find that I enjoyed his weight pressing down on my body. Running my fingers through his hair I try to enjoy this moment. I wasn't quite sure what would happen next, how Jasper would react now that I had kissed him. Part of me was worried but another part was happy that, even if he told me he wasn't interested, I at least got to experience a real kiss with him. Continuing to run my fingers through his soft locks I could feel him slowly relaxing against me.

I could feel my goofy grin from the kiss on my face. The chase around the yard was a lot of fun and had me all worked up. Watching his toned body run was a sight I want to see again. And again. And again.

His eyes were bright with laughter and mischief, the stress of our situation lifting from his face. He was a beautiful man but when he smiled and allowed himself to let go of some of that weight he carries in his heart he truly shines. At one point it took all I had to concentrate on catching him.

I really hadn't thought through the tackle. I just did it. Same when I held him down, not letting him go free. I don't know who was more surprised by the next event, him or me. I had never planned on kissing him but at that moment it just felt right. As soon as he began to kiss me in return I felt my body melt. I knew that there was no going back from this. This simple kiss would change everything. I just wasn't sure if it would be a positive change or a negative one. I mentally crossed my fingers that it would be positive.

I felt Jasper turn his head into the crook of my neck as his hands snaked around my lower back, hugging me close to him. Moving the hand that had been running through his hair to his back I softly rub up and down his spine. Just as I hear him take a deep breath to get ready to say something his phone starts ringing.

Pushing up off of me I whine internally at the loss of contact. Jasper reaches in his pocket for his phone as he extends his other hand to me to help me up. Accepting his help I stand and let go of his hand. He frowns a small frown at me and takes it back, interlocking our fingers. Watching me for my reaction I give him a smile and step closer to him. His frown is instantly replaced with a smile as he finally answers the phone.

"Alice!"

"_Jasper, you two have to leave. I can't explain now. Just please, listen to me. You can't stay there. Leave now and just drive. Don't decide where you go until at least tomorrow morning, keep changing your mind. It should be ok by then. I'll meet you where ever you end up. Don't call, our phones aren't safe. Love you Jas, Bella."_ She hung up.

Jasper looks up to me, his frown back, as he drops my hand and reaches up around my shoulders pulling me into his side instead. We walk back to the house like that, my concerns from my impulsive kiss forgotten as I process what Alice asked of us. Just before we got to the door Jasper stopped.

"What do you think Bella?" I had a feeling that his question had several meanings. I knew we would need to talk about the kiss and what it meant for us but being the chicken I am I answer his other meaning directly, making him read into it for his other answer.

"We listen and let the road take us where it wants." Watching his face I see the corners of his lips creep up in a half smile. It seems like we are both just as unsure about where we stand together as the other. At least it is an even playing field for me this time. I stretch up and give him a quick peck to his cheek. The half smile grew into a full one and he gave a quick nod of his head as we walk into the living room.

~*~

We had been driving for two days. I was ready to get out of the fucking truck. We had finally discussed where to go and decided on the house in Montana. It was just as out of the way as the house in Alaska but was smaller having only 4 bedrooms instead of the 6 or so that the Alaska house had.

When we told Eleazar and Carmen what Alice had said they offered us a truck they had. If the phones were not safe to use it was possible that something had been put in Carlisle's car. Either a tracking device or a bug we thought. We accepted their offer after Jasper talked Eleazar into accepting payment for it. While they argued about it though, Carmen and I had come up with a plan to get us out quicker. She ran to get the truck while I packed up Jasper's stuff. I had never unpacked my own so all I really needed to get together was my shampoo and soap.

By the time that Jasper and Eleazar came to an agreement the truck was there and packed. I just smirked at Jasper as he mumbled his apologies for taking so long arguing with Eleazar. We stopped at the first decent sized town we came to and exchanged phones. I held my breath and closed my eyes as Jasper went into the store. It was risky and Jasper paid the guy inside five hundred bucks just to bump us to the front of the line and get us out first but we made it through without me killing anyone. Jasper was proud of me, I was angry that it was an issue to begin with. Thankfully Jasper sensed it was a subject to steer clear of and didn't press or call me ridiculous.

We had stopped twice to hunt. I was getting better at not getting so messy and didn't need quite as much blood to quench my thirst but every 20 hours or so I still needed something. We were quickly learning that I turned into a bitch to rival Rose when I was thirsty and tried to head it off before it got that bad.

Now though I just wanted to be at the house and out of the truck. I was enjoying talking with Jasper, even if we did stick to safe topics, but I getting stir crazy having had to be in here for so long. I was thinking Jasper was feeling the same way. We were starting to snap at each other a little more and the time between conversations were getting longer and longer the silence stretching on.

Finally he pulled off the main highway and onto a gravel path. After about ten miles of gravel we pulled off again to a dirt path that quickly just turned into a faint trail between bushes. Ten more miles of that and we finally broke to the large clearing where the cabin was sitting. Suddenly Jasper slammed on the brakes coming to an almost instant stop. He was glaring at the cabin, I could almost see the gears going in his brain. Something was wrong.

I stared at the quiet scene in front of me trying to see what had Jasper upset. I couldn't find it though. It was a cute one story log cabin. There was a large front porch, complete with wooden rocking chairs, and the rear of the house backed up almost into the woods. There was a large four bay detached garage to the left. The front lawn was expansive, the dirt path of the drive cutting two tire tracks through the snow.

"Everything ok Jasper?" He didn't answer, just continued to glare at the house. He slowly put his window down while creeping the truck forward. We were about halfway there when I smelled it.

Vampire. And it was less then 5 minutes old.

* * *

**AN: Ack! Who could it be? Don't worry, Chapter 9 is about 3 pages in so it should be up before Christmas. Still would like to know your guesses though!  
**

**First and most importantly, I would like to apologize to everyone who reviewed. I didn't respond to a single one. I tried a few times but my cold morphed into a sinus infection and the meds my Dr gave me zapped my brain. The review I wrote out had something about pink elephants and gophers so I deleted it. It is probably a good thing i didn't respond. **

**Just know that I read them all, loved getting them, thank you all for the get better soon wishes and if you asked a question I will try to get back with an answer this weekend. I will also try and respond to all reviews from now on.  
**

**Now, please let me know what you thought of this chpter! I was excited, their first kiss! Hopefully it didn't disappoint. I had a hard time writing that part. **


	9. Chapter 9 From Strangers to Family

_Previously:_

_I stared at the quiet scene in front of me trying to see what had Jasper upset. I couldn't find it though. It was a cute one story log cabin. There was a large front porch, complete with wooden rocking chairs, and the rear of the house backed up almost into the woods. There was a large four bay detached garage to the left. The front lawn was expansive, the dirt path of the drive cutting two tire tracks through the snow._

"_Everything ok Jasper?" He didn't answer, just continued to glare at the house. He slowly put his window down while creeping the truck forward. We were about halfway there when I smelled it. _

_Vampire. And it was less then 5 minutes old._

**Chapter 9 -From Strangers to Family  
**

**BPOV**

I watched as Jasper's eyes swept across the quiet, snow filled scene before us. He slowly brought the truck to a stop and tilted his head to the right, apparently listening for something. I was nervous. Who would be here? Looking around it didn't seem as if anyone had been here in ages. Jasper even said that since the house was so small no-one ever wanted to come here unless it was just one couple wanting to get away. Even then there were so many other, better places to visit that this poor, cute little home was basically ignored and eventually forgotten about. I wonder if they would let me live here for a while once things calmed down.

"Bella?" Jasper broke me from my daydreams and turned to look at me. "Your senses are stronger then mine. Can you hear or smell anything?" The look in his eyes was calculating but held a hint of hope. Allowing his calm demeanor to ease my own anxiety I closed my eyes and concentrated.

"I can only hear the forest. There is no sound coming from the cabin or the area around it. I can smell the fresh snow, the trees of the forest. I can smell you, of course, and the truck, but that's really…wait. There is a faint hint of roses, tobacco and…fresh cotton? And...and…there is something else off but I am having a hard time placing it." It was something familiar but not something you smell everyday. God! What is it? I should know what it is.

"Could the last scent be ink?" Opening my eyes I was surprised to see Jasper with a slight smile on his face.

Taking another taste of the air I found that Jasper was right. It was ink, old time, fountain pen type ink. How could I have missed that? I nod my head and Jasper's small smile turns to a grin as he pushes the gas and heads to the house.

My anxiety spikes again as we get closer and closer. "Jasper? Who is it? What is going on?"

Pulling the truck to park in front of the cabin instead of the garage, he turns and looks at me, amusement dancing in his eyes. "You remember me talking to you during your change about my past?" I just nod my head. "Well the two vampires that are currently hiding out back in the forest are Peter and Charlotte. Don't ask me why they are here because I have no clue. Peter just knows stuff and has a tendency to put himself in the middle of it."

"So they won't hurt us?" I couldn't help but be nervous. There was nothing telling me to run or that it was a trap. My intuition was actually telling me everything will be fine. But knowing all this still didn't stop my head from overreacting. I reached over and grabbed Jasper's hand as he turned fully in his seat to face me. Bringing his hand up to cup my cheek he looked directly into my eyes.

"They won't hurt us. I promise." I could feel the sincerity he projected and I knew he was telling me the truth. Then I felt something I wasn't expecting, his protectiveness. "Even if it had turned out to be someone else, someone who would hurt us, I wouldn't let them near you Bella. You are safe with me. I wont let anyone hurt you."

Any anxiety I had had left I felt melt away at his words. "Now, my little Puma, lets go inside and see

what kind of trouble Peter has gotten himself into over the last decade."

Hopping out of the truck I met Jasper around front and we walked up the short stairs to the front porch. As we opened the door a small piece of paper floated to the ground just outside the dark entrance. I picked it up and read it aloud.

**Jasper & Bella**

**The yellow room in back is ours. Keep out!**

Jasper started laughing and shaking his head. "That's just like him; coming here uninvited and claiming first pick of the bedrooms. Come on, Puma, lets go get our stuff and get ourselves settled." Turning he went back to the truck and started unloading our suitcases. He actually had a few this time since the plan was to stay here until I was able to be around humans again.

Placing our bags inside the door I looked around the great room. This was so unlike the other houses that I almost thought we had the wrong place. Maybe it just needed to be cleaned up a little. There were still drop cloths and plastic on all the furniture and there was dust and dirt everywhere. I could see the potential of this room, however. It ran the length of the house and was open to the roof. In the far left-hand corner was a small kitchen, an island separating it from the rest of the living space. The dining room table was small and round with only four chairs but it fit the corner between the kitchen and the front wall perfectly. There was a stone fireplace, framed by large windows, along the back wall and a small door in the right-hand corner that looked as if it led to the back of the property.

Taking the time to explore the rest of the house I found the bedroom that Peter had claimed as his and a room that looked like it could have been Edward's on the right side of the first floor. The basement held a small family room, an office and what was probably Rose's bedroom.

Of the two remaining rooms – two because I will not stay in Edward's, so his doesn't count – Rose's was the best. "If it is alright with you, Jas, I will take this one. I can't see you being very comfortable in here, anyway."

He poked his head in from the office and after looking around just shook his head. "Yeah, you can have this room. Maybe we can get some paint and freshen it up for you. I think I will take what must have been Carlisle's office. It will take some dusting but should work fine for me. The sofa is actually still pretty comfortable. For now, though, maybe start cleaning up what you can in here and we can start taking stock of this place to see what needs to be done to bring it up to Cullen standards. Don't worry, I already have the TV ordered." He winked as he left the room, leaving me behind, laughing at him. Men and their technology.

I spent the next few hours cleaning up the bedroom, unpacking my suitcases, and making a list of some of the simple things we would need, like a vacuum cleaner, duster, sheets, washer and dryer; you know, the things you take for granted in a home.

When I had done as much for my new bedroom as I could I walked upstairs to see what Jasper had been up to. I had heard him wander up there about an hour before. I was about halfway up the stairs when I heard the shattering of glass and the sound of snapping wood.

"JASPER!" Running the rest of the way up the stairs and out into the great room I found Jasper and

another vampire rolling on the floor, the wooden floorboards cracking and splintering. I could feel the anger rising up in me as I threw my shield around him. The unknown vampire was thrown back through the broken window where he had entered. Jasper was up and in a crouch as soon as the other vampire was free of him.

Deep laughter came from outside before we heard the loud crack of a vampire being hit by another.

"What in the HELL were you thinking?!? What is wrong with you? He could have, no, scratch that, he WOULD have killed you without even thinking about it! Jasper? I'm sorry, he ran in before I could stop him."

I looked up at Jasper, ignoring the woman as she continued to scream outside. He was standing now and while he didn't look happy he was no longer in defensive mode. He was reaching out and touching the shield I had put up around him. Running over to him I pulled the shield away. His hand still in the air, where the thin force field had been, he moved over and took me in his arms.

I took a breath and inhaled his scent, allowing it to calm my frazzled nerves. I hadn't realized just how angry and upset I had gotten seeing the stranger go after my Jasper. My arms snaked around his waist and I pulled him as close to myself as I could. He stepped to the side just a little, putting himself between me and the broken wall.

On the way here we had avoided the one conversation we should probably really have had, the one about us. At the time I just couldn't bring myself to start it, worrying that he wouldn't feel the same towards me as I did towards him. Now, though, being held in his arms, I really wished we had. Clinging onto him I took a few more breaths, calming myself further, before loosening my hold and looking up at his face. If we had talked then maybe I would know that he didn't mind that I held onto him like this, I would know why I felt so safe with him, I would know what that look in his eyes meant.

I could feel him shaking slightly in my arms. I watched as his eyes drifted closed and he pulled me back, into his chest. There was the light pressure of a small kiss to the top of my head before I felt him rest his cheek in the same spot, his arms tightening even more around me.

I heard the yelling that I had been ignoring stop suddenly. I threw my shield around us as Jasper loosened his hold on me, trailing his left hand down my right arm and interlocking our fingers. He turned, keeping me slightly behind him but not standing in front of me entirely either.

Looking out at the pair of vampires in the back yard, the male looking guilty and the female glaring at him, I was suddenly hit with the realization that not only had I been able to protect Jasper but that he had let me, without so much as one word. He didn't try to send me away when I went to him, he didn't yell at me for getting in the middle of his fight or even for helping him. In fact he pulled me closer, like he needed me to be there.

This was something that Edward would never have allowed. He would have yelled at me, would have chastised me for trying to help, and would have tried to send me away so he could handle it. He never would have let me stand with him to face whoever was out there, even if he knew who they were, as I suspected Jasper did in this situation.

I had to fight to hold back my laughter. That didn't stop Jasper from feeling the sudden wave of amusement from me though. He was looking back at me with an eyebrow raised in silent question. I just shook my head. How could I explain that I found it highly amusing that Edward was always so worried about protecting me, making sure I was safe, when here I was with the power, the ability to protect others? Sure, I can't protect them from everything, I can only protect myself and my mate from physical attacks, according to Eleazar...

Wait…

Eleazar said that he thought I would only be able to project my physical shield to protect myself and my mate. I had not only just protected Jasper from a physical attack, but I was able to project my shield to where he was. Just as Jasper was turning to look at me fully I tried my best to hide the confusion and whirlwind of other emotions that I was going through. I knew that I liked Jasper, hell if I was honest with myself I would admit that I was falling for him, but could he really be my mate?

I shook my head to try and clear my thoughts. I needed to concentrate on what was going on around me. This was not the time to think about this. The two crimson eyed vampires were walking through the hole in the wall and I still did not know who they were or why they attacked Jasper, who was just staring at them with a hard look in his eyes. I felt him squeeze my hand just a little, the simple gesture reassuring me.

The strangers stopped just inside the room. The male looked like he could have been Jasper's older brother. He was the same height, his hair the same color although cut short. He was also a bit stockier and his face a bit rounder then Jasper. The woman beside him was petite in both height and build. She was probably only a bit taller then Alice and had long, straight blonde hair that was blowing in the breeze brought in by the giant hole in our wall.

"You are so going to be fixing this, asshole." Jasper broke through my assessment of them. I could hear the amusement in his voice but his face was set in a slight sneer. The guy's eyes shot up from the floor to meet Jasper's as the woman cleared her throat. "What? Don't give me that look, Char. He was the one who not only came through the window but then fucking attacked me!" She just met his stare, giving it right back to him, as her eyes darted to me and then back to him. "Oh."

I was even more confused now then when this whole thing started. This was Peter and Charlotte? Why would Peter have attacked Jasper, though? I heard Jasper clear his throat as he gave my hand another slight squeeze. I let him feel some of my confusion and saw him nod his head slightly in response. I was not going to be dropping my shield until I knew exactly what was going on. I didn't quite know just how I was doing it, anyway, so I wasn't going to chance not being able to call it up again.

"Puma, these are my good friends, Peter and Charlotte. Peter, Charlotte, this is my, ahem, this is Bella Cullen."

I tried to give them a small smile. Charlotte took a small step forward, towards us. "Bella, it is so nice to meet you. I hope that my idiot of a husband didn't scare you too badly." She shot a look back to Peter who was quietly looking at the ground, but I caught the smirk on his face. He might be acting sorry but he wasn't. "I don't know what he was thinking, attacking Jasper like that. He knew you were here."

I dropped Jasper's hand and, finally, my shield. As I walked slowly up to Charlotte I could feel Jasper's eyes on me but he let me go without so much as a breath. Smiling as I got close to her I reach over and give her a light hug. "Don't worry about it. Everything ended up fine and really, these floors needed to be replaced anyway." Breaking our hug I looked back to Jasper who was smiling at me with bright eyes; I couldn't place the emotion hidden there. Looking back at Charlotte I could see the hope there as she smiled a huge smile at me. It was as if an instant friendship had been born. The bright teal in her eyes told me that she would not only be very important to me as a friend, but also as a sister.

Suddenly I was scooped up from behind in a tight hug. Knowing it was just Peter I fought with my instinct to shield myself and let him swing me around.

"Peter!" Jasper was growling. "Put her down. Now." I was on my feet by the time Jasper had been finished speaking and before I could even worry about my balance he was beside me. Peter had backed up a few paces and was holding his hands in the air. "What the hell is your issue today, Peter? Why did you not only attack me but break apart the entire wall to do it?"

Peter shrugged off the question. "I just wanted to make an entrance. So, Bella dear, what got you stuck babysitting our Major here?" Jasper's growl was getting louder as Peter spoke. I had the feeling that Peter was doing everything he could just to get Jasper riled up and I couldn't help the smile that broke out at that thought.

"I think it was the other way around actually. He is running around babysitting me."

Jasper just shrugged and pulled me over to the sofa. "Not like you are all that difficult to look after. We just need to keep you away from the humans for a while yet."

"Having trouble sticking to the animals are you? Char, we lost another one to the darkside." Peter was shaking his head in mock shame but Charlotte had started laughing.

"She's a newborn you idiot!"

"What?" He looked truly shocked.

"Yeah, just a few weeks old now. What, you all consider me a newborn until I hit a year old right?"

"For the most part. Your super strength and speed will last about that long but really it depends on how well you take to the change. You are doing exceedingly well. You managed to fool old Peter here, and that is not easy." Jasper was probably enjoying that a little to much. Peter was still sitting there with his mouth hanging open. Reaching over I close it for him.

"Unless you like the taste of fly you might not want to leave that open." I was rewarded with laughter from Jasper and Charlotte. Peter however narrowed his eyes. I crossed my arms and lifted my eyebrow, I wasn't buying it. His lips twitched before he gave in and laughed with the others.

"I like you Bella. We are going to have a lot of fun. I can see it now." Jasper groaned at that, which Peter ignored, instead continuing to talk to me. "Now dear Bella, what is your story? "

I knew it was coming but that didn't mean I was looking forward to getting into it all again. Do they even know who I am? "How much do you know already?"

Charlotte looked down at her lap as she answered. "Well, nothing really. We haven't spoken to Jasper in a little over ten years. We haven't seen him for almost thirty."

Wow. That was a long time. I realize I must have been quiet for a little longer then I thought when I felt Jasper's hand rest on my leg and a wave of concern from him. I shook my head and turn to smile at him. Well, the beginning was the place to start it seemed. "I moved to Forks, Washington last year where..."

"Forks? Seriously? Who names their town after silverware?"

I had to choke back my laughter at Peter's opinion. It was a silly name for a town but if I didn't get this all out at once I wouldn't get it out at all. "I don't know. Now if you want to know what happened then no more interruptions. Do it again and I won't finish, got it?" I tried to give him a stern look. I guess it worked because Peter just nodded and mimed locking his mouth. I caught a proud smile on Jasper's face before he looked down, hiding from my view.

With a deep breath I launched into my story since arriving in Forks. I still gave the cliff notes version but went into a little more detail then I had with the family. Something told me that not only could I trust these two but also that they would benefit from knowing.

By the time that I had finished the anger in Peter's eyes matched Jasper's. Charlotte launched herself over the coffee table between us and attached herself to my neck in a fierce hug. I lost it and began sobbing into her shoulder. I felt Jasper's hand on my back, rubbing softly, to help me calm down. I was angry with myself for breaking down. I thought I was over what happened but the compassion in Charlotte's hug told me it was ok to let go. I didn't have to be strong all the time.

I felt the couch dip as Peter sat down next to me. He lightly moved Charlotte away so that he could give me his own hug. After a few moments I calmed down enough to talk again. "Sorry about that guys. Don't know what got into me."

Jasper and Peter both went to speak, Peter beating Jasper by only half a second. "Don't ever apologize for that Bella. Ever. You have nothing to be sorry for. What that ass did to you was unacceptable and the fact that you are not only here but aren't royally screwed up because of it speaks volumes about your inner strength."

I closed my eyes and took a breath before giving a quick nod and responding. Peter was right, I had nothing to be sorry for, it was ok to be upset every now and again. "Thank you."

We were all quiet for a moment, squished on the couch. Finally Jasper spoke up. "Now that you Bella's story, what the fuck are you guys doing here?!?"

Peter laughed and moved back to the sofa across from us, Charlotte following. "I knew you would need my help and so we left Mexico and drove up here. We were headed to Alaska but about halfway there I decided it would be better to come here instead. We only beat you here by a few hours."

Jasper was smiling, his amusement reaching his eyes. I wanted that look to stay on his face. He really didn't smile enough. "And why did you feel the need to attack me? And don't try to charm your way out of fixing that hole in the wall."

"Like I said. I wanted to make a entrance. First impressions are important, I wanted to make a good one on Miss Bella here."

We all broke out into more laughs, after I informed Peter that he actually did not make a good first impression. We relaxed and talked some more about noting real important, Jasper, Peter, and Charlotte mainly catching up on the past years. By the time that we broke so I could go hunting, Peter and Charlotte had wormed their way into my heart and became like another family to me. I had gone from one rather small and broken human family to two very full vampire ones, The Cullens and The Whitlocks.

~*~

The sun was beginning to rise as I stood on the front porch and watched it begin to peek up over the horizon. Jasper had left early this morning to travel the several hours into town to pick up some things for the house. He probably wouldn't be back until this afternoon. Peter and Charlotte were currently in their bedroom where I was not about to interrupt. We had been at this home in Montana for three days now with no word from our family. I was really beginning to worry and being away from Jasper was just making it worse.

I was finally allowing myself to think about everything I had been putting off thinking about. I ran through everything that Eleazar had told us about my power and couldn't believe that I hadn't caught on earlier to the fact that he thought Jasper was my mate. I liked to think of myself as an observant person, someone who picked up on little hints, but this one had gone right over my head. I was blaming the whole 'I have a super powerful ability' bomb he dropped for distracting me. Looking back on my rather short vampire life, however, it wasn't just Eleazar and Carmen who thought that something might be happening between us. Really thinking about the things that Alice and Esme had told me, I could tell that they thought the same.

I knew that I was falling for Jasper. How could you not? Beyond even the physical attraction, because, really, he was just downright gorgeous, he was a perfect mixture of strength and sensitivity. He has protected me since the moment he found me but at the same time has allowed me to find my own way, be it right or wrong. That was something that endeared him to me regardless of whether or not we ended up together.

The more I pondered the subject of Jasper, though, the more I was forced to think about my relationship with Edward and the fact that he really hadn't been a good boyfriend. He completely took over my life and controlled everything he was able. Where he should have encouraged me to try new things, he held be back because I might get hurt. He constantly told me I needed to have human experiences but then kept me away from my human friends. His endeavors to convince me that I was beautiful and worthy were almost the only good thing he had done for me.

The truth of it, though, was that as much as Edward hadn't been a good boyfriend, I hadn't been a very good girlfriend. I did nothing but complain to him and doubt his feelings. I gave in to him more times than not and, while most of the time it really didn't matter to me what we did, there were times where I had ignored what I wanted in favor of his ideas. I relied on him far more than what was healthy and that had put on him a pressure that he never deserved. It made me wonder that perhaps if I had stood up for myself from the beginning that, when things began to get bad, we would both have been far better prepared to handle it.

It was amazing how much I have changed since, well, my change. I expected the physical changes but the emotional ones were a surprise. The memories I had managed to hold onto were a bit fuzzy but I could remember feeling unworthy of his attention and that I wasn't good enough. It was sad but vampire me had to agree, though not for the same reasons as the human me.

For what it was worth, I was able to see now that I always had been pretty and that I had been the only one holding myself back. I had allowed my fears to take over my life and rule me. I now understood that the only truth in my theory that I hadn't been good enough for the Cullens to befriend and take in was that it is impossible to be good enough for others when you are never good enough for yourself.

I had always blamed my mother for forcing me to grow up too fast, and maybe she did mess up some things, but she also taught me to follow my heart, that everyone deserved to be happy regardless of their situation, and that everyone had it in them to be happy. That was a lesson I had forgotten.

I blamed not being popular on my looks when the truth was that I had never let anyone in. I had hidden behind my long hair and books and had secluded myself from the world around me. I had been so lost in my own head that I hadn't been able to see just how much the people around me truly cared. My mother, my father, the Cullens, even Angela and Mike from school. Once I met Edward no-one but him had mattered. I truly wondered now why they had put up with me. I could only hope that it was because they could see through the walls I had unknowingly built around myself.

Knowing now that those walls were there I was able to think back upon the past few weeks to when they had begun to come down. The first cracks started to appear when I refused to accept Edward's words. Granted, it was for the wrong reasons; had he managed to leave me in the woods I was sure that I would have fallen apart. But that was when the foundation first cracked all the same. Then, during my change I accepted that I wasn't going to be able to change my situation, but I could still change how I would react to it. It took me a few days to come to terms with everything but, by the time I was sitting on the roof with Jasper, I had finally allowed myself to fully open up to someone. I had listened while he let me past some of his own walls and, later, when I told him what happened with Edward I wasn't able to censor it. It was the first time I had ever said everything that came into my mind and allowed myself to feel every emotion that passed through me. And it had felt great.

I was stronger now then I had ever been before, and not just physically. Deep down I knew that I would now be able to handle whatever it was that life decided to toss at me. I would be strong when I needed to be, able to hold up those whom I loved and who loved me. I might still have my insecure moments but who on this earth doesn't? The difference now is that I would not let those simple insecurities take over and keep me from doing whatever it is I want to do.

Taking a deep breath, I was surprised to find that the sun was high up in the sky. I turned and almost jumped in surprise at finding Peter leaning on the door watching me. He gave me a wide smile as he walked over to me.

"Well, Little Bella, you figure out what you needed to?" I wasn't quite sure what he was talking about; what was it that I was supposed to figure out? He just continued to smile at me as I stayed silent, never breaking our eye contact. Finally he just nodded his head. "Stay strong, Bella. He is going to need that strength." With a final nod he turned and walked back inside.

I remembered Jasper saying that Peter just kind of knew what was going on, and that he loved being all cryptic about it, but he hadn't quite gotten across to me just how annoying it was. As I walked inside I was suddenly drenched as a bucket of water was dumped on my head. He had also failed to stress just how much Peter liked practical jokes. I suddenly couldn't wait for Jasper to get back so I wouldn't have to deal with him alone. Or plan, alone, how to get back at him.

* * *

**AN: Hope everyone had a wonderful Holiday!! Sorry this is late being posted but after some writers block and then some changes it just took a while to finish.**

**I have a beta now! I feel so official now. Thank you Sinvisigoth for helping me out here, your help is invaluable!!**

**Let me know what you all think! **

**Have a fun and safe New Years!!  
**


	10. Chapter 10 Official

_Previously:_

_Taking a deep breath, I was surprised to find that the sun was high up in the sky. I turned and almost jumped in surprise at finding Peter leaning on the door watching me. He gave me a wide smile as he walked over to me._

"_Well, Little Bella, you figure out what you needed to?" I wasn't quite sure what he was talking about; what was it that I was supposed to figure out? He just continued to smile at me as I stayed silent, never breaking our eye contact. Finally he just nodded his head. "Stay strong, Bella. He is going to need that strength." With a final nod he turned and walked back inside._

_I remembered Jasper saying that Peter just kind of knew what was going on, and that he loved being all cryptic about it, but he hadn't quite gotten across to me just how annoying it was. As I walked inside I was suddenly drenched as a bucket of water was dumped on my head. He had also failed to stress just how much Peter liked practical jokes. I suddenly couldn't wait for Jasper to get back so I wouldn't have to deal with him alone. Or plan, alone, how to get back at him._

**Chapter 10 - Official**

**JPOV**

Thank god I was almost home. I hadn't realized just how much it would suck to be away from Bella, even for just a short while. I had never felt like this when Alice and I were apart. Sure it sucked, but the pull that I had, the need to be next to her, just wasn't there like it was with Bella. If this was what being away from your mate felt like, I _almost_ felt bad for teasing Emmett so much for whining whenever he was away from Rose. Almost.

Pulling down the drive I watched as Bella came out to meet me. I parked the truck in front of the house, deciding it would be easier to unload from there rather than from the garage. Hopping out of the cab I opened my arms in just enough time to catch Bella as she threw herself into me, hugging me tight. Tightening my own arms around her I pressed my lips to the top of her head in a small kiss. God, I missed her so much.

"Welcome home, Jasper. Did you pick up everything?" She loosened her grip and leaned back just enough so that I could see her face. I watched as she slowly reached up and tucked a bit of my hair behind my ear. I leaned into her touch before I could stop myself.

"As much as I could. I did, however, get a computer so that we could order everything else. Bella?" Taking a step back out of her arms I look down at her. "Why are you all wet?"

Her eyes narrowed and a quiet growl escaped. "Fucking Peter."

I couldn't have kept back the laughter if I had wanted to. She turned her glare on me as she poked me, hard, in my chest. "It would not be in your best interests to keep laughing."

I managed to cap the laughter but I couldn't wipe away my grin. The fact that Peter liked Bella meant so much to me. He and Charlotte had never really cared for Alice, although they didn't really dislike her either. "Welcome to Family Whitlock. He only pulls that kind of crap on people he really likes, so feel loved."

"Yeah, well, he has a strange way of showing he cares."

"That's just Peter. Now, help me get this crap inside?" I didn't really need help, I just wanted to be close to her.

Her face lit up at my simple request and I could feel gratitude and love coming from her. It was the first time I had felt such pure love from her and I was so taken aback by it that I didn't even stop to wonder why the hell she was thankful for me asking for her help. In a daze we carried the bags and boxes inside, sitting them around the living room.

We had just made the last trip when Charlotte came in through the back door. "Bella? Do you have a second? I would like to talk to you about something." Charlotte's eyes flashed to mine for the barest of moments as she spoke to Bella. Great, she wanted to talk about me. Why couldn't she have done that while I was gone? I had figured that was why Peter rigged it so I was the one to go to town in the first place.

Bella turned and looked at me and I could see the questions in her eyes. Although I really didn't want her to go I wasn't going to ask her to stay. It's not as if I needed her here to set up this stuff. Really, I had just gotten used to having her all to myself over the last week, ever since she found me on the roof that night. Picking up one of the bags of computer equipment, I started sorting through it instead of watching her leave, deciding to have my own little pity party in my head.

"Jas? Is it ok?"

Bella was standing in front of me as I looked up. I tried to figure out what she was talking about but came up blank and I was pretty sure I hadn't missed part of the conversation this time. "Is what ok?"

"Um...that I go with Charlotte?"

"Why are you asking me? You don't need my permission to go." I snapped back. I watched the anger flare in her eyes as she cut off her emotions from me. I really hadn't meant to snap, I just didn't want her to leave yet; I had just gotten home. I sent her a wave of guilt and sorrow to try and apologize.

"I just wasn't sure, what with you being in charge of me and all." My apology didn't work, she was still angry.

"Bella, I am not 'in charge' of you. I just want to help you. All I meant was that you are your own person and if you want to go with Char then go. You don't need to ask me if it's ok. Just let me know when you do leave so that I don't worry and I will do the same. Ok? That was all I meant. I'm sorry it came out so...angry."

I waited as she just stood there looking at me. After a few minutes I tore my eyes from hers and looked at the ground. I really did feel bad for snapping at her. I felt her hand as she took my chin, moving me so that I was forced to look at her. Her eyes had softened and she no longer looked angry.

"How's this? When I get back you and I will go off and shop for furniture and such, just the two of us?" She let me go as I nodded my head. "Good. Now, get to work on this computer crap. We can't shop if you don't put it all together!" She smiled at me as I rolled my eyes. Before I could respond further however I felt her lips brush against mine in a soft, chaste kiss and then she was out the door. I watched as she and Charlotte disappeared, giggling, into the forest.

Smiling to myself I got to work on hooking up the computers, waiting for Peter to come forward. If Charlotte had taken Bella out to 'talk', I could only assume that Peter was supposed to 'talk' to me. After waiting for a solid ten minutes, however, I grew impatient.

"Alright, Peter. I don't know what you are waiting for, but let's just get this over with shall we?"

"Fine. What's taking you so long?" He walked out of his bedroom and flung himself onto the decrepit sofa.

"What is taking me so long for what?"

"Bella, you jackass. I would have figured that you two would have been going at it like rabbits by now." I dropped the cables I had in my hands and just stared at Peter. What the hell was he talking about? This shit takes time. Or, at least, that was what I was telling myself. The fact that we have yet to really _talk _about us, or the kiss in Alaska, means nothing. We just need some time to get used to it.

Peter rolled his eyes and shook his head at me. "You are an idiot sometimes. Do you like her?"

"That would be an understatement." Damnit. That wasn't supposed to be aloud.

"Then I ask again, what is taking you so long?"

"Look, Peter, it's not that simple…"

"Sure it is. You love her, she loves you; really there isn't anything complicated about it."

"Of course it's complicated. The last guy she fell in love with just killed her, and that's not even going into the crap he did and said to her _before_ he finally bit her. And me, I just got my heart broken by the first person outside of Maria's army I ever trusted. In over a hundred years too, I might add. I can't go through that kind of shit again Peter. Hell, the only reason I am doing half as well as I am is because of Bella. I would probably still be up on the roof in Forks if it wasn't for her."

"Alright, when you put things that way, sure it sounds a bit...fucked up. But, trust me, you don't have to worry about all that with her. Jasper, she is your other half. You two were meant to find each other. Fate and all that shit."

"I don't know Peter. I believed for so long that Alice was my fate. I'm not sure that I believe in fate any more. I figured out that she was my mate before I figured out what I felt for her, just like with Alice. I can't be wrong again; I wouldn't make it through it a second time."

I had slumped down on the chair across from him, giving up on the pretense of running cables. Why was I suddenly second guessing everything? Just an hour ago I was all about being with Bella. I hate these talks with Peter. I always end up more confused then when we started. I heard him give an exaggerated sigh. I knew what was coming next; it was always the same when I started acting like this.

"What the hell are you talking about? I swear, how you managed to live this long I don't know. Do you even have a brain in that thick skull of yours? I am going to have to explain it all to you, aren't I? Of course Alice was your fate. She was just part of it and wasn't the _mate_ fate had in store for you. Fate is rather flighty and fickle. You never know just what it has in store for you or where it will take you. Think about it. Meeting Alice brought you to the Cullens, who in turn brought you to Bella. Bella falling for Edward brought her to the family and, in turn, you."

"If we were meant to be together then why didn't we feel the attraction right away? Why did I try to kill her?"

"You didn't kill her, though. Something stopped you before it got that far. Sure, it could have turned out differently, but it didn't and my belief is that if it had gone further something else would have stopped you. But, in the long run, could haves don't matter, only what actually happened does. As far as why you weren't attracted to her before is concerned, did you ever stop to think that maybe she needed to be a vampire in order for that bond to be there? Could you have fallen in love and been with a human?"

As much as I didn't want to listen to logic at the moment, he had a point. With my control, or lack thereof, there was no way that I could have been with a human. I would have killed her. Really, Edward was the only one who had enough control to try, and even then he had his breaking point.

"Jasper, listen to me. You feel that pull? The tugging deep in your chest that is almost painful?" He waited until I acknowledged that I did feel it. "I feel it too, with Charlotte. It is a physical sign of the bond between mates. You two need each other. Just as she has helped you heal from the pain that Alice caused, you have helped her heal from the pain Edward caused her. You were right when you told her she was worth it all those months ago. Think about it, and I mean really think, is she is worth the risk of heartache when you could just as easily get bliss? You admit to loving her, I can see it in your eyes that you do. Now all you have to do is pull your head out of your ass and do something about it.

"She is strong, Jasper, just like you. It is a different kind of strength but the two of you together? Well, that will just be a sight to see." He got up and walked away from me, leaving me to sit here. He was right. I loved her, more then I have ever loved anyone before and she was worth the risk. Getting up, I went over to knock on Peter's door but he opened it before I had the chance.

"They will be back in a half hour, so Char and I will go for a hunt then. Don't fuck this up, Whitlock." He winked at me, then shut the door in my face.

I bit back the laugh that tried to escape. "Asshole know-it-all." I barely said it but I knew when I heard chuckles from the other side of the door that he had heard me. Picking up the cables I got back to work on the computers and thought about how I wanted to say things to Bella when she got back.

I was just finishing cleaning up the mess when Bella and Charlotte came back inside. Before I could even say hello to them Peter was already halfway out the door, dragging a somewhat confused Charlotte with him. "Be back in the morning Whitlock! Have fun!" He wiggled his eyebrows at me and then they were gone.

"What the hell was all that about?" Bella asked, looking confused.

"He said something earlier about needing to hunt. I guess he just wanted to get going sooner rather than later?" It came out more as a question and I cursed myself for being nervous. This was Bella. I was able to pour my heart out to her just weeks ago, yet now I got nervous just being in the same room as her. No. I needed to get a grip and remember what Peter said. She was worth it. Whatever she says, it was worth the possible heartache to find out how she feels. And hell, she had kissed me a few times now so there really shouldn't have been anything to worry about. _Yet, why am I still nervous? Ugh! I just need to get this over with._

"Hey, Bella? I was hoping that, maybe, we could talk for a bit?"

I watched as she pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. The urge to sweep her into her arms and kiss the hell out of her became so strong that it took all I had not to act on it and pull that lip from between her teeth just to slip it between my own. I vaguely registered that she nodded her head as she sat on the chair across from me. Sliding down into the sofa I tried to remember what I had worked up in my head earlier.

She sat there, waiting for me to start talking, but every time I tried the words got stuck. She still had her emotions blocked from me but I could see the worry in her eyes. I tried to send her some reassurance but if she felt it she made no sign. Why did this have to be so hard?

I dropped my eyes to the floor, hoping that if I wasn't looking at her then it would be easier. I was wrong. The truth was that, while I knew she was worth it, I was still scared to lose her, scared that if she knew how I felt she would turn me down and stay away from me. I, Major Jasper Whitlock, the vampire who was still feared in the South, was scared.

"Bella, I…" I took a deep breath, just spit it out already! "I…I got all the computers set up if you want to look for new furniture." Chicken shit.

I snuck a quick glance up at Bella and I could tell that she knew I just ducked out of something. She had made no move towards the computers, said nothing. Her eyes closed as she took deep, calming breaths. I looked back to the ground, picking out and counting the different colors of thread used to make the rug, wishing that she would let me feel her so that I could know what to say. A few minutes had passed this way when she finally broke the silence.

"You can tell me Jasper, whatever it is." She had pulled that lip between her teeth again and while her eyes held a small amount of hope, they were also full of worry. I had to stop being stupid and just be me. This worrying and pussyfooting around was not me.

I took one last deep breath and looked up into her eyes before I opened my mouth, launching into what I had planned to say from the beginning. "Bella, I love you." Fuck. That wasn't what I was going to say! "Er, I mean…um…fuck." My eyes closed and with my elbows propped up on my knees my head fell into my hands. I am doing nothing right today. Nothing.

I felt more then heard Bella getting up and moving to kneel in front of me. I felt her small, delicate, hands wrap around my wrists, tugging them lightly, to get me to let go of my head. I wanted to stay hidden however and pushed the heel of my palm into my closed eyes. I didn't want to scare her, hell I had only just admitted it to myself, I really hadn't been ready to say it aloud.

"Jasper? Jasper, honey, look at me. Please." I couldn't deny her anything when she asked like that, her quiet voice begging me to listen. She should never sound like that. I slowly lowered my hands from my eyes and lifted my head just enough so that I could see her. She let go of my wrists and one hand took mine while the other went to my chin to lift my head so I was facing her completely. She softly ran her fingers across my cheek and tucked my hair behind my ear.

I reached up with my free hand and took hers, lowering it back to my lap. "I'm sorry Bella. I didn't mean for it to come out that way." I whispered to her. "I guess I just got nervous and…"

"Jasper…" I kept talking, not letting her interrupt.

"I had this all planned out, what I was going to say…"

"Jasper."

"And then I was so nervous…"

"JASPER!"

"It just kind of came out and…"

I heard her let out a sigh before her lips touched mine. I froze for only a second before responding, moving my lips in time with hers. Closing my eyes I got lost in the feel of her. Letting go of her hands I move mine around to her back, pulling her closer to me. She moved hers to my neck, one fisting in the hair at the back of my head. Tilting my head I deepen our kiss, running my tongue across her lower lip. She opens her mouth, her own tongue darting out and fighting me for dominance. I let my hands trail down her back and ass to the top of her thighs. Gripping tightly I lift her up into my lap. She comes willingly, straddling me, never breaking our kiss.

It was by far the best kiss I had ever had. I felt her pull lightly on my hair and I couldn't stop the moan that came from deep within me. I felt her smile and took advantage of her distraction to take over and explore her mouth. She allowed this for only a moment before pulling harder on the back of my head, causing both my head to tilt back and another moan to come unbidden from my throat.

She broke the kiss, moving her mouth to pepper smaller kisses along my jaw to my ear. I pulled her tighter to my chest as she nipped my ear. I heard her take in a breath before her quiet whisper, "You going to be quiet for a moment and listen to me now?"

I nodded my head, not trusting myself to speak just yet.

"Good. Because I wanted to tell you that I love you too, Jas."

A breath I hadn't realized I was holding was let out as my head fell forward onto Bella's shoulder. She let go of my hair and moved her arms to hug around my neck as mine tightened around her waist. I knew our talk wasn't over but I didn't want to move from this hug, didn't want this moment to be over. Being in Bella's arms felt so right, so perfect. I never wanted to be anywhere else.

I couldn't believe it, she loved me too. How lucky could I possibly be?

We sat there on the couch without speaking for what seemed like hours, while in reality it was only minutes. I felt Bella start to pull away and let her sit back on my knees with my hands resting on her hips. I couldn't let go just yet.

She had a small smile on her face as she looked at me. Her eyes a muddy color, their red slowly being replaced with the distinctive gold of the animal drinkers. As I looked into her eyes I realized that I could feel her again. The love she was sending out at me matched what I felt for her. I felt no fear or nervousness from her, just love and contentment.

Drinking in her emotions, I allowed them to calm my own before beginning to speak. "Well, it seems like my hard prepared speech is kind of pointless now doesn't it?"

She giggled and arched an eyebrow at me. "Is that a complaint?"

"Hell no. Just an observation."

"Good, because I like how it worked out. You are cute when you ramble on, although the not listening to me did get annoying."

When I couldn't think of a good response quick enough I just stick my tongue out at her causing her to giggle more. It was a sound that was quickly becoming my favorite.

"So, my little Puma, does this make us official now?"

"I believe it does, Major. Before we celebrate, though, I want to get some stuff out. I know that I probably don't have to say it but I want to start things off with you clean and clear. I am over Edward fully. It hasn't been that long but, thanks in part to you, it feels like forever ago. I feel so strongly for you that it scares me sometimes, the raw power of it. It was like as soon as I admitted it to myself it took over me, wouldn't let me think of anything else. I love you, Jas, and will for the rest of time."

I couldn't help the smile that crept on my face. I knew she was over him, but it was nice to hear it from her own lips. It also helped to know that the strength of this bond was scaring her too. "Thank you, Bella. Just like I'm sure you know I am over Alice completely, I want you to know that I am in this with you one hundred percent. I really do think you are my other half, Bella. A part of me will always love Alice, as I am sure a part of you will always love Edward. They were our paths to each other. Without them I wouldn't have found you; I wouldn't have found my soul. Whatever the future brings, I am here for you, Bella. And just so you don't feel bad, the speed at which I fell for you honestly scared the shit out of me. Hence the stumble and kind of blurting out of words earlier."

"You did kind of just throw that out there. But the stumble after was worth seeing. For me anyway. I'm sure you felt awkward as hell."

"Yes, thank you for pointing that out. Can we please not tell that part of this story when we tell the others?" She threw her head back in laughter but was shaking her head as well. Damn, I have the feeling she will never let me forget that moment. "Fine. Be that way."

"I'm sorry Jasper. Alright, I'm not really sorry, per se, but still. I just can't pass up the opportunity to tell the family, or Peter and Char, how much you let things get to you. You, Mr. Stoic, let your nerves get to you. I'm telling you, we need to mark the calendar or something."

"Alright, alright! Enough, you have made your point. Just so you know, though, I am going to deny it. Now, subject change. You ready to shop for some furniture from this decade? I am having a hard time believing that our Esme picked out this sofa. Her taste is so timeless. This living room set? Not so much."

"Alright, Jas, I'll drop it. For now. Just be ready for when Peter gets back. I might not know him that well yet, but I have a feeling that he will be a lot worse then anything I could ever dream up."

I groaned at the mere thought of him knowing how I had let everything get to me. This would not be fun. For me, anyway.

Bella went to get up but I held her where she was. Leaning forward I gave her a quick kiss. "It will be nice to do that whenever I want now." She smiled and ducked her head. If she had still been human she probably would be blushing. "Come on, Sweetheart, lets go shopping."

It was around midnight when we finally got finished picking out new furniture. There was a lot of ugly stuff for sale out there. I think we ended up laughing at the choices more than actually looking at what we liked. Just as I was inputting a delivery address, I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I had a text from Peter.

**Found Alice, will be home in 20.**

What the hell? I look up to Bella, who was reading the message over my shoulder. She just looks up at me and I could feel her anxiety and fear. My own was just as bad. I had been doing what I could not to worry for my family and not being able to contact then had been hard.

Closing the laptop I placed it on the table and reached up for Bella's hand, pulling her around the sofa and into my lap. We sat quietly together until we heard them running towards the house, three sets of feet. Bella stood up, reaching her hand out to me. Taking it I allow her to help me up before shifting our hold so that our fingers were laced together. We moved together to the door out back to wait for them on the deck.

I heard them slow just before I saw the three of them walk out from the cover of the trees. Alice paused, looking between Bella and I, before she ran at full speed to us, enveloping us both in a hug. How she managed to get the both of us in her tiny arms I have no idea but it didn't matter. She and Bella were sobbing and talking over each other as I gave a squeeze to Alice. She may have broken my heart but I had missed her energetic presence and I knew that we were still going to be close friends.

Backing up I let the girls have their moment and greeted Peter and Charlotte as they walked onto the deck. "Hey. Where did you guys..."

"We'll get to that later. So...you pull your head out of your ass yet? You two were standing awful close when we got here."

"You could say that." He just stared at me. He has to try and know everything. Shaking my head at him I continue, "That is all you are getting from me. Just know that whatever Bella tells you is a lie." I looked over to Bella as I said that, only to see a flash of mischief run through her eyes as Alice squeals.

"I knew it! I knew it the moment you left your phone with her, Jas." She was jumping around Bella who looked at her like she was an annoying puppy who just would not settle down.

I was laughing at the mental picture that thought gave me when I heard Peter, "You left your phone behind with her? Damn dude, you got it worse then I thought."

I just shook my head, walked over to Bella, grabbed her hand, and went inside, trusting that the others would follow. I was happy to laugh and joke with everyone but I wanted to know what happened back in Forks.

As everyone settled down I looked over at my ex-wife who was sitting herself on the floor. "Alright Alice, what happened in Forks?"

* * *

**AN: I am very sorry yet again for the delay in posting. Unfortunately it seems like work isn't slowing down however so it might be a while before I can get back to the weekly postings. **

**Thanks again to my wonderful beta Sinvisigoth!! I really can't thank you enough!**

**And also thank you to everyone who has reviewed, favorited, or alerted this story! I am really happy that you are all enjoying it so much.**

**Oh and before I forget, just a reminder that I still don't own it.  
**


	11. Chapter 11 Anger and Shock

_Previously:_

_I just shook my head, walked over to Bella, grabbed her hand, and went inside, trusting that the others would follow. I was happy to laugh and joke with everyone but I wanted to know what happened back in Forks._

_As everyone settled down I looked over at my ex-wife who was sitting herself on the floor. "Alright Alice, what happened in Forks?"_

**Chapter 11 – Anger and Shock  
**

**BPOV**

It was the longest twenty minutes of my life. Or, at least, that's what it felt like. I would have thought that with the speed and randomness of the thoughts that were flying through my head, time would have sailed by without my even having noticed it, but no. That wasn't my luck. Instead I was very aware of every second that ticked by, my thoughts drifting from family member to family member, the conversation with Jasper, the fact that I had declared my love to him (something I had NOT planned on doing), and Alice's imminent arrival.

Worry and concern laced just about every moment and I was very happy to be in Jasper's lap. His hand was absentmindedly rubbing up and down my back as we sat there silently, each lost in our own heads, and waited.

I never did care for waiting.

All waiting ever did was work to make me more upset. Maybe it was the insecure teenage girl in me but the more down time I had the worse my nerves became. Now on top of that I have the fact that I am a new born vampire and I just couldn't stop the downward spiral of my thoughts. Something deep inside me told me that this visit from Alice would bring nothing good other then just us having some news. By the time we finally heard the steps of the three vampires returning to the house I was convinced that Edward had killed everyone and Alice was there to take Jasper away from me.

I knew I was being irrational, but the thoughts just wouldn't stop coming at me. It was like being in a tornado and I was powerless to control where my mind went. I could feel the calm and love that Jasper was sending to me but I couldn't keep a hold of it. It felt like every time I tried to grab a hold of it the feelings would run through my fingers and away from me. I knew that he was trying to let me work through everything on my own, and I appreciated it, but I felt like I was drowning. The only thing that was keeping me from running away and avoiding what I _'knew'_ was coming was Jasper's physical presence beside me. He anchored me to the present, kept me from running away from the 'what ifs' and 'maybes' that were plaguing my mind.

Watching as Alice ran towards us, managing to get her tiny arms around us both, I couldn't stop the sobs that broke out. I had reached the breaking point of emotions and as I felt myself fall into the black depths of my mind I felt the surge of strength and love sent from Jasper. This time when I tried to grab the emotions they held firm and I was able to keep from sinking. Alice was jumping around me and for as happy as I was that she was here I could do without the hyper child act. It was just too much in such a short period of time.

I could hear Jasper trying to joke around with everyone but it sounded forced to me. No-one else seemed to notice. I heard him tell Peter that anything I would tell him would be a lie and I tried to put on a smile to play along. I think it worked but Jasper knew better. As he grabbed my hand he gave it a tight squeeze while leading us into the living room to talk. The rest of the group followed, the jovial mood from just a moment ago having fallen away.

"Alight Alice, what happened in Forks?" The worry was obvious in Jasper's voice as he spoke. I knew how much it was hurting him that he couldn't be with his family as they faced whatever it was Edward was bringing down on them.

Alice took a deep breath and looked around the room, not meeting anyone's stare. After a few minutes Jasper and Peter were both starting to show their impatience but she finally dropped her eyes to the floor and began speaking.

"Edward showed up about a day after you left. He knocked on the door and before anyone could stop them, Rose and Emmett had attacked him. They didn't hold back although they didn't take off his head or burn him either. He fought back some of the harder hits and when they started trying to take off his fingers, slowly, he managed to take a swing at Em, but he just sat back and took the rest. It took Carlisle, Esme, and I to get them to stop."

I let out the breath that I hadn't realized I was holding and tried to calm down. I didn't forgive Edward but I didn't want him hurt either. This made me feel oddly guilty, like I should want him to be in pain; I should be happy that my brother and sister took up for me when I wasn't there to do it myself. But I didn't feel that way. I wanted to know _why_ he acted the way he did and then I wanted him gone. Not killed, just not in my life.

"Once all parts were accounted for - Em had tried to keep a finger and then an ear from him - Emmett and Rose were sent hunting. The rest of us sat and waited in the living room. Edward said nothing as we sat there, he only had a cold expression on his face. But his eyes were flashing emotions faster then I was able to catch them. I had never wanted your power more Jasper." She smiled up at him, meeting his eyes for the first time since entering the house. Jasper however just sat quietly and waited for her to continue.

"Once Emmett and Rose returned, and promised not to attack again, Carlisle verbally went after Edward. I have never seen Carlisle so upset as he was at that moment. He was disappointed in Edward, hell, we all were. No-one could understand what had happened, why he treated you the way that he did. Edward said nothing as Carlisle went off. Again, he just sat there and took it, looking at the ground the entire time. Once Carlisle wound down Edward finally looked up and spoke. 'I don't know what you are expecting me to say. I know that what I did was inexcusable, and you all have a right to your anger, but please, let me see Bella.' When we told him that you were no longer in the area the mask slipped from his face and anger was all that was left."

Anger? What right did he have to be angry?

"He demanded to know where you went; he said that his business was with you and not the family. He wanted to know why we were trying to hide you from him and that it was useless to try. Someone eventually slipped in their attempts to shield their thoughts, however, and he was able to hear that you went to Alaska. As soon as he did he stood and tried to leave. Emmett reached him first and managed to put him in a hold but before anyone could say or do anything else we heard the sound of two vampires running up the drive. Edward slumped down in Emmett's hold and cursed causing the rest of us to pause. Edward _doesn't_ cuss. Ever. Carlisle looked to me but they were there before I could tell him who it was.

"Jane and Felix, guards from the Volturi, slowed to a human run speed when they came to the house but didn't stop to knock. They just walked right in and stopped in front of Edward and Emmett.

"Jane said 'You should know better then to try and run from us Eddie.' as she released her power into Edward. He screamed and Emmett dropped him to the floor, unable to keep holding him through his thrashing around. She said, 'did you think you would be able to hide from Aro? Silly boy, after all this time you still haven't learned.'

"Felix stepped up and put his hand on Jane's shoulder and whispered something in her ear. She cut off her power, but Edward just stayed curled up on the floor. Felix walked back to the doorway and leaned against it. As Jane began speaking to Edward again. The two guards never once so much as looked at the rest of us; we might as well not have even been there."

Alice's eyes had drifted back to the floor in front of her and had a slightly glazed over look to them, like she was separating herself from the story. The rest of us had stopped breathing by this point, out of shock. I knew who the Volturi were but Edward had told me that he had never been there nor met any of them. Jasper's hand had found it's way into mine and we were both holding onto each other with all the strength we had. Somewhere in the back of my mind I hoped that my extra strength wasn't hurting him but he wasn't saying anything so I let the thought go.

"Jane continued talking to Edward, shooting small random shocks through his body as she spoke. 'Edward, you took a favor from Aro and as payment you were given a job to do. All he wanted was a shield, a simple shield. How do you think he felt when he found out you found one and tried to hide her from us. Not only that but this shield knew about us, our secret, and didn't care. She even wanted to become one of us. Yet you hid her from Aro, how do you think that would make him feel?' She shot a larger jolt of her pain through Edward. 'ANSWER ME!' she yelled at him.

"His voice cracked as he spoke through the pain, 'Why do you think I came back? I was trying to fix it.' but Jane wasn't listening. Felix had to step in again before she stopped shocking him."

"But, when she stopped this time she seemed to realize the rest of us were there. She glanced around the room at each of us before commenting. 'So sad. I guess you all will have to pay for his mistakes. None of you are allowed to leave, if you try we will kill you.' She swept a small sliver of pain through each of us, not enough to cause more then just a whimper, but enough for us to know what she was capable of. As if seeing what she did to Edward wasn't enough."

Alice's voice broke as she finished speaking. Her eyes had drifted closed and she was taking deep breaths. I could see Jasper concentrating on Alice as I felt a bit of calm from him leak out into the room. He must be trying to help her calm down. Looking over to Peter and Charlotte I could see matching blank expressions; they were trying to mask what they felt. They may not have been part of the Cullen family but, from what Jasper had told me, they were considered very close friends. Peter caught me looking and tried to give me a reassuring smile, but I could see, in his dark red eyes with their playful light blue swirl, the worry and fear he felt.

I was having trouble deciding what was worse, the made up scenario in my head or what actually occurred, but the story wasn't over yet. I knew that it could get a lot worse than it already was. It hurt me to see Alice here like this. I tried not to worry about what was coming next, she would tell us in a moment, but it was hard. I tried to steel myself with strength and confidence to help support Jasper and Alice both but I didn't know if it worked. Jasper gave my hand a squeeze as best he could through our already strong grip and glanced over to give me a small smile so I knew that he felt what I was trying to do.

About ten minutes passed before I heard Alice's deep breath and small, measured words. "Felix and Jane let all of us but Edward have full access to the house, just so long as we didn't attempt to leave. Jane explained her power's limits, if we had tried to jump from a window and run she would be able to drop us before we were far enough away. They locked Edward in the basement since they couldn't trust him not to run. Again. He has apparently been running from them since your Birthday Bella. I guess they figured that even if he broke through the door, the noise would give them enough notice to catch him before he got far.

"It was the next day when Felix approached me and asked me to go hunting with him. He would allow me to hunt from the forest on the way to or from Port Angeles but I had to promise to behave. Before we left I overheard Jane telling him that the backup was about a day away and then they would be free to follow Edward up to Alaska to collect Bella. She also said not to lose me but that if I did slip by him she had her way of tracking me. It took me half the hunting trip but I finally worked it out that somehow they were able to track our cell phones.

"On the return trip I was able to get far enough away from Felix to make that quick phone call to you, telling you to leave Alaska. I didn't know if they could listen to our conversations but it was worth the risk. I was hoping that we would be able to get away from the Guard before the backup got there but I wasn't sure how, so that's why I asked that you not make a decision on where you were going. I knew that I couldn't see you but I didn't want to take chances with Edward in the house. I can't hide my visions from him while I am getting them.

"We got back to the house without incident and Felix took each of the other members of the family hunting, one on one. Jane wasn't happy about it but Felix stood his ground with her that we needed to hunt. She finally gave in and sulked around the house while he was gone. It was while he was on the last trip out with Esme that we took our chance and ran. Jane was in the garage when we took off out the back door to find Esme. I was the last one out and was the only one within range of her power when she found us. I yelled for everyone else to keep running as she dropped me to the ground with the full force of her power. She tried to run after everyone else but they had to much of a head start.

"She never let up on her power as I thrashed on the ground. I don't know how long we were there for. I couldn't focus, everything was blurry, and aside from my screams, sounds were muffled and far away. Suddenly everything stopped. The pain faded from my body but my sight was black and there was no sound, not even from my own breaths.

"This seemed to go on forever. I couldn't tell if we were still outside or if someone had moved me. I knew my eyes were open but all I saw was blackness. Even my memories were black and mute. It was as if all sensory from my brain was cut off. I was starting to go crazy, I was so scared, when slowly my senses started to come back. Things were still a bit blurry and muffled but I was able to hear and see my thoughts again. I heard a voice from behind me, he told me to run, that this was my chance, that, that I should just run, so I did.

"I stumbled and I fell until my vision fully cleared. I knew I was in the woods, although I didn't know where. I later figured out that I was in northern Canada. But I listened to that voice and I ran. I ran for a few days before I ventured near a town. I broke into someone's house and took a quick shower, then went and bought a phone. I tried to call everyone but they must have listened to me because my calls all went right to voice mail.

"I looked at everyone's future and after a bit I finally found Carlisle and Esme leaving Alaska with The Denalis. Emmett and Rose were somewhere in the Midwest. Both groups were trying not to make any decisions to avoid my sight, not knowing if I was still near Edward or not. He was still locked in our basement, the guard having no plans to let him out soon, but he was trying to find a quiet way to dig himself out.

"I tried countless times to try and find you guys. I was at the end of my rope and took a shot in the dark by looking into Peter and Charlotte's future but it finally worked. I saw him break through a wall and attack a black spot. I kept watching until they decided to go hunting a few towns away and I was able to start making my way there. We ran into each other on the way and they brought me back here."

With a final deep breath Alice opened her eyes and looked at each of us. I couldn't decide if I was happy that no-one had been hurt, or pissed off because of everything that Edward had done, to me and the family. Looking into the faces around me, however, I could see they were facing the same argument. And yet, something still wasn't sitting right with me. I tried to look into my mind to see if I could figure out what it was but I got no further than the feeling that we were missing something. Something had been left out of her story.

Peter was the first to break the silence. "Do you know what Jane meant when she said that Aro had given Edward a job to do, that all he wanted was a shield?"

Alice shook her head as she spoke. "Not for sure. What I told you was the extent of the conversation. From what I can piece together, though, Aro did something as a favor to Edward at some point and as payment he was to find someone whose gift was a shield." She looked up to me. "Apparently Aro somehow found out that he might have found someone with said gift and not only didn't bring her to Italy to be turned and join the guard but also tried to hide both her and himself."

I could feel the anger building up inside me. Not only was everything Edward ever said to me a lie but he was planning on just passing me off to some guy in Italy, like I was some kind of trinket. A bauble to be collected on a tall shelf only to be dusted before family comes to visit for the holiday. I felt my arms begin to shake as I thought about it. The audacity of these…these _people; _to even think I would want to be a part of their guard in the first place! Edward was going to pass me off to them and just be on his way, payment paid and accepted.

I felt it as my eyes slid closed. My entire body was shaking with repressed rage. I could feel Jasper as he moved in front of me, cupping my face in his hands, speaking soft words and sending me as many calming emotions as he could think of. I couldn't concentrate on his words, though; his touch felt so far away, his power just sliding off my skin before it could affect me. I was powerless to stop the anger, rage, pure hate, that was flowing through my body. And I no longer wanted to.

Edward had broken me for the last time. I would no longer allow him to have any hold over me whatsoever. He was dead to me and if he ever crossed my path he would be dead to the world once I was finished with him. I felt more then heard the growl begin in my chest. I would make it slow and painful, take away the things he loved most first, like his beloved piano or music collection. Or maybe I would just systematically tear him apart. I would take every bone from his body, would dissemble him like a surgeon would.

I could feel my hands clenching and releasing at my sides. I was quickly losing control of my body and fear began to grow. The quiet growl that had been rumbling in my chest broke free as I struggled to stop this reaction. I felt it as my head shook back and forth, as I fought with myself. I felt the venom pool and press behind my eyes as tears welled up but were unable to fall.

Suddenly it felt like I had hit a brick wall, stopping my breath and all of my movements. My eyes flew open and I was met with the topaz and blue eyes of Jasper. They were hard and determined but I could see the love and concern just under the surface. He said nothing, just continued to stare, our gaze locked on one another. His eyes pulled me from the hole that I had fallen into within my own mind and I slowly began to breath again. I felt it as the tension in my muscles slowly released as I calmed down. I refused to break our eye contact for fear that the anger would come and take me away again. I had always been led by my emotions, they were just never so strong before to just take over my entire being.

As the minutes passed more and more tension fled my body and finally I broke our stare and fell into his chest with a quiet sob. He held me tight and rubbed his hands up and down my back, whispering quietly. I was angry, yes, but I was not a violent person. The anger that had been inside me scared me. I couldn't help but wonder if I was a bad person at the heart of me. What if that was how I always was, and I just repressed it? I didn't want to be like that.

"Bella? Sweetheart, look at me." Jasper's sentence was spoken softly but it carried the weight of a command. With a deep breath I pushed myself away from his chest to look at him. His arms released me but his hands caught my shoulders and held them. "It's ok, Bella. Nothing is wrong with you, I promise. Being a vampire your emotions are stronger and deeper than they were as a human. It is easy to let one take you over like that. You are still learning control, and while you came out with far more then any other newborn, some things do take some getting used to."

I nodded my head, feeling a little better, although I could tell that it would take me a while to actually let it go and fully relax. Speaking of letting it go, "How did you pull me out Jas? It felt like I hit a brick wall but we are still in the living room and nothing new is broken."

A smile crept on his face as he ducked his head to hide it. I reached up and placing two fingers under his chin I lifted his face so I could look into his eyes. He had a proud look in them but was trying to hide it. I leaned in and whispered softly, "don't hide your smile from me Jasper."

Leaning back I watched as he let go and released his full smile at me. I found myself mirroring it through the little bit of worry and fear I still had left. I felt the cushion dip next to me and looked over to find a rather excited looking Peter.

"Dude, hurry up and answer her! I want to know too. I have never seen you pull something like that. It was like you completely stopped her mid freak-out!"

With a shake of his head he let out a small chuckle. "Have you ever jumped in a river or lake that turned out to be a lot colder then what you thought?" I looked over to Peter as we both nodded our heads that we had. "Well all I did was take that feeling you get when you first enter ice cold water, that shock to your system that takes away your breath, and basically threw it at Bella. I didn't know if it would work, I wasn't sure if that kind of 'shock' would really be considered an emotion or not but nothing else I was throwing out there was working so I figured it didn't hurt to try."

"Wow. Quick thinking, Major. Think of the shit you could do with that. I bet it would knock humans to their knees! There was this small bank in town that we could..."

"PETER! You will NOT try to rope Jasper into robbing that bank with you!" Charlotte yelled from the other side of the room.

Jasper met my eyes as we both lost it in a fit of laughter. It was a great tension breaker and allowed us all to recover from the stress of hearing Alice's story. Once we all calmed down from the laughter we took a break and just sat and talked about nothing. I showed Charlotte and Alice the furniture that Jasper and I picked out and they helped me pick out new paint and hardwood floors to go with it. After a short time however I noticed that Alice had wandered off alone and was just sitting by herself on the deck. Stepping through the hole that Peter had yet to fix, I sat next to her.

"Everything ok, Alice?"

"Hmm? Oh, sorry, Bella. Yes, everything is fine. I think I might have to leave soon, though. I have to try and find the rest of the family. You are planning on staying here?"

She was still staring off into the woods intently, never once looking over to me as she spoke. "I think. You will come back when you find them?" She nodded her head and stood up. Something felt off, the feeling that I was missing something important almost overwhelmed me. She finally took her eyes off the woods and looked at me. The light I was used to seeing in her expressions was dimmed. She pulled me close for a hug and I felt her shake with a silent sob before she quietly whispered that she would call when she could and left to say goodbye to the others.

I stayed on the deck and looked back to the forest to try and see what she was looking at. Nothing stood out though. I was startled when a pair of strong arms wrapped around my waist and I felt a light kiss on my neck.

"You doing ok, Puma?"

I relaxed back into his arms as I thought about his question. "As well as I can be Jas. It was a lot to take in and something tells me we are missing something important in the story." I felt him nod his head behind me in agreement.

We heard Alice as she closed the front door and started running down the drive with our hopes of seeing the rest of the family soon. Peter and Charlotte came out and joined us as we watched the sun set behind the trees.

Once full darkness had fallen around us Jasper slowly stood up, placing his hands on my hips. "Come on Bella, lets go for a hunt. You should need it after a day like today. I know I do." I nodded my head as he took my hand, leading me down the short stairs and we took off together into the woods.

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**AN: Sorry this chapter took so long but I wanted to make sure that it was right and it just would not cooperate.**** Hopefully it was worth the wait!  
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**Special thanks to Sinvisgoth, my super awesome beta. Your help has been invaluable!**

**Also, Flights of Fate was a featured review over on the blog Altered Lions and Sacrificial Lambs. I want to thank them for their honest reviews, I just about cried (the good kind) when I saw that they not only read my story but reviewed it as well. If you have a moment, and are not on a work computer (take their MA warning to heart!), go visit them at alsltwilight (dot) blogspot (dot) com.**

**As always, let me know what you thought!  
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